THE WAR OF TOOTHPASTE It started off rather innocently at first, I awoke from my slumber with a gnawing thirst. To the bathroom I darted with haste, to discover a conflict had arisen between my toothpaste.The Crest was building bunkers out of cotton balls, the Rembrant was on the window sill, repelling down the walls. The Colgate was regrouping behind the toilet bowl, the Pollident let out a cry of rage and surged towards its goal.
Then as a witness, I claim this to be true, all those which were white joined those which were blue. The cinnamon flavored teamed with the ones that were red, the multi-colored turned on each other and soon lay dead.
The two opposing forces fought on 'till dawn, and when the dust settled, all my toothpaste was gone. The battle had tried to prove a point, but at a deadly cost, the war was over with nothing gained and everything lost.
I drank my glass of water with a tear in my eye, then buried the dead while saying a silent good-bye. After that day I never looked at toothpaste the same, I stuck to one brand and made sure it was tame.
- K. Scromeda Copyright 1997
Poem #13 I want to see death in the eyes of a twelve year old boy I want to see unborn babies ripped from their junkie mother's womb I want to laugh at the war veteran begging in the street I want to laugh as I watch him drink his own urine to survive I need to see eight year old girls in lingerie or naked with a bullwhip between their thighs I want to see an old man being beaten by a group of kids simply for being old Taking pleasure in other's sorrow is a skill I've learned over many years I took a night class on it in fact Raping The Natural World 101 it was called We used paper and pencils from clear-cut tropical rain forests We went on poaching field trips and big game safari We dissected the endangered condor and ate its heart with a sprinkle of MSG Garbage burning and industrial waste was my major and when I graduated there was already a job at McDonalds waiting for me I want to see the tear on a newborn's face as its mother places it in a dumpster and goes off to join Corporate America - K. Scromeda - Copyright 1998
Ordinary People Freaky Freddy was a real swingin' cat Killed his mother with a baseball bat Kept her body hidden in the freezer He tried so hard but nothing would please her Prozak Patty was a real sad chick Burned off her hair with a disposable Bic Carved up her face with a buther's knife Then drove to the boarder to start a new life Necrophile Nathan preferred the company of dead Piles of skulls and bones made the perfect bed Living flesh never really yanked his chain He didn't like his subjects to feel any pain Big Sadist Sammy was the opposite way Idulged in acts of torture every other day Felt there was something missing from his life So he went on a quest to find himself a wife Now Patty met Sammy down in Mexico South She was using some scissors to cut up her mouth When Sammy saw Patty it was love at first sight He asked her to marry him and she said 'I just might' Poor old Freddy isn't as freaky anymore It seems the Sheriff found the hole in the floor The piles of dead bodies weren't all that groovin' 'Look,' said the sheriff, 'something's a movin'' Just then Nathan popped up a greated his guests 'Excuse me boys, but please pardon the mess' It seems he'd been living there for quite some time He claimed their juices made 'mighty fine wine' In the end everyone got their fix Patty ran off with some guy from channel six Sammy found joy in obscure religion Freddy and Nathan are in the joint learning nuclear fission - k. scromeda - Copyright 1997
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