Pauvre, pauvre de moi
Ma thérapie n'a pas réussi
J'ai battu le thérapeute, et causé une émeute
Et je ne sais toujours pas qui je suis.

Pauvre, pauvre de moi
J'ai raté tous les ateliers
Je ne sais pas qui je suis
Peut-être une dernière thérapie.

Pauvre, pauvre de moi
Je dois me libérer de la peur
J'ai marché sur la braise et sauté d'une falaise
Mais je trouve pas mon enfant intérieur.

Pauvre, pauvre de moi
Je dois trouver mon âme soeur
Les soirées célibataires, je suis accompagné de ma mère
Mais les femmes me font toujours peur.

Pauvre, pauvre de moi
J'ai raté tous les ateliers
Je ne sais pas qui je suis
Peut-être une dernière thérapie.

Pauvre, pauvre de moi
Le suicide est contre la loi
Il n'y a qu'un espoir, dans ce grand trou noir
Me plaindre c'est ma plus grande joie.

Poor me, poor me, oh poor me
I ache when I meditate
I don't know who am I, I can't find my third eye,
Maybe it's something I ate.

Poor me, poor me, oh poor me
My mother says I look sick
There must be some stuff, In my aura's too rough
Or my magnetic shoes are too thick.

Chorus:

   Poor me, poor me oh poor me
   My therapy is in a rut
   Enlightenment isn't my luck, Not yet
   Maybe one more group, And I'll get
   Unstuck, unstuck,
   Maybe, one more therapy.
   Maybe, one more therapy.

Poor me, poor me oh poor me
I’ve tried therapies of all kinds
I beat my therapist, Because he said that I missed
But I still can’t find my inner child

Poor me, poor me, oh poor me
My girlfriend is teaching me tantra
We lie on our sides, and come with our eyes
And instead of orgasms, we've mantras.

Chorus

Poor me, poor me, oh poor me
I failed all my therapy groups
I screamed at my dad, ‘Cause he said I was bad
And he still calls me nincompoop.

Poor me, poor me, oh poor me,
My bullet proof vest weighs a ton
It's so hard to dance
In my cast iron pants
Oh when will I ever have fun?

Chorus

Poor me, poor me, oh poor me
For which guru shall I vote
If I find the right master, I’ll get enlightened much faster
I’m worried that I’ll miss the boat.

Poor me, poor me oh poor me
If I try suicide I'll be jailed
There's only one thing, that relieves my suffering
I love, how I love to complain.