July
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are we not men? Devo, Jocko Homo.
I've promised to go shopping for clothes with my mother. I am not amused. Not only am I forced to do this as I'm running OUT of clothes (If you'd seen my warderobe, you would understand that this isn't one of those 'I have nothing to wear out of my 500 clothing articles' statements.), but also because ... I promised mom. 8(
i know what you do cause i do it too Devo, Peek-A-Boo. |
Blargh. I really, really don't want to go shopping. I'm sure it's fun if you can actually walk in somewhere, choose something and it'll fit perfectly, but since that is not the case then ... it's agony. I'm always forced to resort to the plus size sections at one point or another. Have you people NOTICED how frumpy and ugly plus size clothes are? Maybe it's just Sweden. Ugly patterns, pathetic colour combinations, ugly UGLY UGLY. I guess it doesn't help that I'm a really picky shopper either. I don't approve of a lot of colours, it has to be just big enough to be almost too big, even for me, and forget a pattern more prominent than something barely visable to the human eye in normal day light. People can be so blahy too. It's getting old to always hear "I can't believe you're wearing BLACK it's so hot!". Many times I've thought to myself "Oh how neat it'd be to be this walking colour explosion", but then as soon as I reach the store, my face gets frowny, and I discard thing sat a one second glance, ESPECIALLY if it's colourful ... no. I can't bring myself to buy anything red, or something bright yellow, or .. unless it's under wear or socks. Pathetic.
Kafka sticks dandelions in your hair (Kafka = Jessica) |
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"Peek-a-boo,
Boo-ka-pee, Michael Flanders, The Ostrich. (Told to me by Dylan. 8) |
Tiny, teeny, wimpy entry today. Why? MY WRISTWATCH stopped! Here I was, humming and smiling, getting ready to spend the next 45 minutes on this diary, when all of a sudden my friend Magnus shows up to tell me they're closing. "What? It's only 6.15, you don't close until 7!" ... "It's 6.57 ..." *cry* Ah well.
Went shopping yesterday. Found a pair of black pants. Oh golly. As we were going to drive home, we get into the car and ... the battery's dead. 2 hours later, my cousin shows up to drive us home ...
One nice fact though ... as I was randomly looking for more PJ Harvey images for my gallery, I stumbled upon a nice bunch - put up by someone I knew a few years back. What a shocker! I quickly e-mailed, and yes, I got his permission to put them up - yey! And then he e-mails to tell me he has some Tori pics I can use too ..
Rar. Time to go. rar. 8( |
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Sandman's comin'
Sandman's comin'
You and the swan will float upon
Sandman's comin' Elvis Presley, Cotton Candy Land
I mentioned yesterday that an old friend promised me Tori pics he'd taken at this years Roskilde festival. Well ...
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Yeyyy. Today's the first day of 3 wonderful Crazy Farmers Days in my town. Crazy Farmers Days is an annual three day fair that's been taking place here since ..o I dunno, at least since the turn of the century. It's gotten its name from the time when there were more farmers around here ... they'd all get into town to attend the fair, get unbelievably drunk - hence 'crazy'. As I left the library for a while to call Maria, who's finally back from her vacation, I saw the upper half of the ferriswheel behind one of our supermarkets rotating. For some unexplicable reason, this made me really giddy, even though I'd never get up in one of those little ferriswheel baskets myself. Too squeamish about hights, unless they're on an aeroplane altitude. It really has lost its charm though. When I was a child, this fair was the biggest thing all summer. I'd run around on my own and stay out ridiculously late even as a wee 10 year old - the atmosphere was just so harmless, and the smell of warm popcorn, spillt beer and sweat of too many people trying to navigate in far too narrow streets so wonderful. I still stay out every night until they close, even though now it's more a tired ritual, than a cause of the actual thrill and excitement of the whole thing. It feels so strange to walk around as the streets empty out, and one ride after another is shut down. One doesn't have to be right smack in the middle of it to feel it, though. I live on a hill that's about 5-7 minutes walk from the town center where the fair is located. Every year, the music from the rides, their flickering yellow and red and green lights, and voices from various people trying to make their particular ride sound more tempting than the others can be heard and seen from our balcony. It's like looking into one of those little glass balls you shake to get the stuff inside to snow down on whatevers been depicted in there when it's calm and untouched. I think I'll buy some cotton candy tonight after all. Who cares if it's really too sweet and sticky? |
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we live on a mountain
it's become a habit
I go through all this
I go through all this
it's real early morning
and when it lands
I go through all this Bjork, Hyper-Ballad
I had cotton candy and cherries and ice cream last night. Jeeeah. |
Whoa.It's amazing. Everytime I return from Maria's, I'm deeply in love with Bjork. It's just something that happens to me there. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that I always make her show me new things she's gotten on video or tape with Bjork ... it just triggers my head so that I usualy walk home trying to fend off evil spirits in the woods by singing happy things.It's just SOMETHING about watching dussins of clips of a tired Bjork, a giggly Bjork, an angry Bjork, a bored Bjork, a Bjork suddenly throwing her head back in the middle of a song to let out a sound like a cross between a dolphin and a horse that just sucks me in and makes me want to run around and shout 'BJORK! BJORK! BJORK!'. Although I must admitt ... watching just 3 minutes of a strange black and white arty movie she appeared in when she was 20 almost made me yawn my lungs out. I'm such a hypocrite. :=)
 Bjork - by The Amazing Lunargirl
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My New Sunglasses.
Bakom mina solglasögon Translation:
Behind my sun glasses,
Docenterna, Sun glasses
I can't get over Björk. She's just TOO CUTE!
 Cute Bjork. I remember I even tried to look Björkish during CuSeeMe with Jessica last week ... heh.
 Not Björk. Evidently. Rar.
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I bought the sun glasses shown in the sidebar yesterday, on the closing day of the Crazy farmers days. Combine the pink glass with my orange/red hair - I was bound to get some funny looks. I didn't really mean to buy them - I was trying to locate my mother so I could get the extra money I needed to buy this Depeche Mode t-shirt I had spotted somewhere along the fair but since it seemed impossible - I caved in. They work too, this way I won't get a headache when I'm in sunlight, PLUS I can see through them if I scamper indoors for a while, so i won't have to take them on and off and on and off and ... lovely. I love my new sun glasses. And my new Depeche Mode T shirt. 8)
It's funny how I expected this weekend to be unusualy dull. I hadn't heard from Ninnie, nor Maria, so I just figured neither was home or free to go have fun at the fair with me. Instead, I ended up going to the fair friday nigth with Maria and her boyfriend, and then to their place where we watched the new released Leon - the professional with 23 EXTRA MINUTES - I nearly died, and later - Bjorkmania. Saturday I only went to town to spod - that evening I watched Taxi Driver on tv, and pretending there wasn't a big feast thing going on 10 minutes away. Yesterday, I end up spending 5 hours at the fair, first with Monica, who encouraged me to buy these sunglasses, and later Ninnie, whom I unsuspectedly stumbled upon as she was looking for .. ME! And to think - not ONE unwelcome comeone all weekend long. By far, this has been the most successful Crazy Farmers Days festivity I can remember. Yey.
Yes. Everything turns slightly pinkish when looking through those glasses. Lovely. When one takes them off later on - everything is slightly green. Hehehe. Warped sense of reality, anyone?
Someone is using my online name, alanis, at another telnet talker (Resort). I'd be fine with it, if only the person didn't insist on writing info about herself in her character file amounting to things like 'I have no selfasteem' etc etc. Ah well. |
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i live by the ocean
this is where i'm staying Bjork, The Anchor Song
 © Sven Nordqvist For some unknown reason I promised Ninnie she and I'd go swimming when she can get away from work in some week or two. The above image is a pretty accurate view on how it'll seem. Heheh. I haven't even had a bathing suit since I was 12. Heh.
I'm sure you've noticed it by now. I always seem to forget to change either the date, or even the actual day that these entries have been written on. On many occasions, I've returned online on monday, only to find the entry I left saturday has been sited as "Friday", or in some instance, "Thursday". Sorry 8( |
A few years back, when I was still in High School, this girl was in my class. She even had my name. She was the tiniest girl I ever saw, and her voice matched her body in every sense. A lot of people would really get on her case about it, like make rude comments in class about how they couldn't hear her, or just snicker behind her back. Once even a teacher made some rude remark, all disguised as "giving a helpful tip". Sometimes it would get on my nerves too, but she was a friend, albeit not a very close one. Instead I tried to boost her confidence some when she had to give a speech or so by smiling and nodding, to show at least SOMEone was paying attention. One day she was at my place, and we were talking. Suddenly she says "I wish I was you, sometimes, Jennie. You're always so positive, and funny, and you always have a billion stories and things to say." I just starred at her for a moment, and then lapsed into telling her why I thought she was perfect just the way she was. It really shook me up. I spent all those years in school wishing every now and then that I'd be this and that person when things in my life were all screwed up and ... here's this person telling ME they'd like to be ... me. Insane. Today she suddenly walked into this library. She's -so- changed! It's wonderful to see. She walked up to me, and started talking, and everything about her is just DIFFERENT. She moved away a year ago to go to school. I could barely get a word in, because she just had all these sentences and stories and smiles to give out. Most of all - her _voice_. It's grown all big and strong, just how I always imagined it'd be when given a chance. Wah I'm so happy :)
Maria sprained her ankle, so I'm visiting her today so she'll get some company. Argh. Something tells me this Bjorkmania'll last longer than usual this time. Heheheh. |
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is that all there is? PJ Harvey/John Parish, Is that all there is? I'm working so much on my PJ Harvey Page, dammit. I have this ridiculous childish vision of making it an amazing site that everyone will love and see as one of the more ultimate PJ sites around, but then again ... I'm the one creating it, and sadly enough - I'm not THAT good. I'm trying. And I _am_ putting up a small realaudio archive, even though Dylan's spent all morning scaring me with copyright laws and making me read all sorts of legal pages. I think I can get it to work - I mean, I don't mean anything more by the archive than wanting it to make people want to buy MORE of her cds. Dammit. I want EVERYONE to give PJ more money yes. I'm a nice fan. I do think so. Nyah nyah.
 My Friend Debbie (Kerowyn) I can't believe I know all these women who are just plain gorgeous. This is one - Debbie. Deeeebbbieeeeee. rar. And there's always that Jessica. So pretty, these people. *shruuuug* :)
 Frida Kahlo © Lucienne Bloch And then there's always Frida Kahlo. |
Bjork: |
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flying
floating
singing PJ Harvey, Ecstacy
Ghod. In my quest to make the yummiest PJ Harvey page, I've ended up with 18 sections to create/complete. Ah well. It's not -really- like I had anything else planned for what's left of this summer, right?
Me and my brother forced my mother to watch The Full Monty with us this morning. We all laughed like hyenas, especially at the last scenes. If you haven't seen it ... Ghod, get out from under that rock and rent it! Hooray for British Comedy!
I've spent two nights at Maria's in a row this week. Somehow, it's going to be really nice to not have to walk for 50 minutes in the midst of wacky night to get home ridiculosuly late (4 am, 2 am...), all hungry and over tired. It's gunna be so nice to go home to my place tonight and just be lazy and eat my food. :) |
BLEEEEEEEAH!!!It's really hard to write entries sometimes. (This is one of those times, can't you tell?) It's so easy for people to just say "Well, you can always skip today, you know? No one is forcing you ..." when I spend 20 minutes whining to them that I have no inspiration to write anything that day. Hmm. It's like this. I've never kept anything I can think of for as long and regularly as I have this diary. Every time I've tried in the past to keep an irl diary, or exercise on a regular basis or WHATEVER, it's all ended once I allowed myself to "skip a day". I feel that as long as I can get online and put up an entry, I DID something that day, even if it's just a short inane entry about nothing. It's not really a "Gotta post every day my public wants it", because it has nothing to do with you people reading it at all, even though it does matter to me in a positive way. When I put up an entry, I really feel like I have accomplished something. I find personal value in it every time I start to click at random around my archive and see the changes I've gone through. In the midst of maybe a few weeks of just bubbly entries about what I saw on tv and what my latest obsession is, I think I manage to squeeze in entries where I sometimes catch myself by surprise when I read it later and go "WOW ... I think something clicked there". This diary 'forces' me sometimes to reevaluate emotions and memories and standpoints, it makes me sit before posting and think "Why has this memory affected me so much today?", and even if all the chitter chatter going on in my brain isn't represented a lot in the entry I end up writing, I know I've benefited from having had those internal discussions.
Wow. Hehehe, amazing. I managed to put up something for an entry after all. Yey! I think I'll celebrate by allowing myself to use my bummblegum scented pink lip balm. It suits my sunglasses oh so well. 8) |
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