thoughts of the day

random

...............

I used to feel so broken, but now I just feel sick. I am alot stronger without having to rely on Him and without having to be afraid of the dark and the things that were (never) in the dark. I used to feel so weak because I didn't have to carry my own weight, and now I am. I am doing things, I am leading and starting and I am in charge of myself and the welfare of those who rely on me. Now I have the commanding personality that He had. I walk into the room and they all look at me. They all see me. Perhaps this scares my would-be friends off. Perhaps my self-centered writing frightens my would-be friends off.

Bells / Fake breasts / Students fornicating in the halls / Nudity / FUCK JESUS / Boys / Boys' Pain / Blond / They all want to be blond / Publish this when I die? / Bleed / Lipgloss / Commentary / Glitter / Wet / Illusions.

Poet
Beauty
Loss

I AM.
I am a strange kid.

You look familiar. Did we date, once? Did we spend the night together? Did I leave you while you slept? Are you a musician? Did we share a room at allstate? Did you put my hand under your skirt during the bus ride home? Are you lonely? I'm lonely. What's that? Oh, we've never met? Well, hello. This is who I am. Want to spend the night together?

STOP

eight-sided figure
red paint
metal
on a pole.
the epitome of
The Machine's control
over everything.
"Obey," it should
say. "Obey and let us pass. Put
yourself second
only to us." they
ask us to kill each other for them.
They ask use
to kill
each
other.

I am the boy from your nightmares. I am the boy who used to sing. I don't sing anymore.

It completes me to talk to myself in my head.

fallen

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