Quotes

 

"Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake whole relationships."
Sharon Stone

"Honesty is the key to a relationship. If you can fake that, you're in."
Courtney Cox, Monica on "Friends"

"I read somewhere that 77 per cent of all the mentally ill live in poverty.
Actually, I'm more intrigued by the 23 per cent who are apparently doing quite well for themselves."
Jerry Garcia (Grateful Dead)

"Clinton lied. A man might forget where he parks or where he lives, but he never forgets oral sex, no matter how bad it was."
Barbara Bush (Former US First Lady)

"Ah, yes, divorce..., from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet".
Robin Williams

"Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place."
Billy Crystal

"Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and just give her a house."
Rod Stewart

"On the one hand, we'll never experience childbirth. On the other hand, we can open all our own jars."
Bruce Willis (on the difference between men and women)

"My girlfriend always laughs during sex - no matter what she's reading."
Steve Jobs (founder of Apple Computers)

"Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men.
Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps."
Tiger Woods

"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch."
Jack Nicholson

"According to a new survey, women say they feel more comfortable undressing in front of men
than they do undressing in front of other women.
They say that women are too judgmental, whereas, of course, men are just grateful.
Robert De Niro

"When the sun comes up, I have morals again."
Elizabeth Taylor

AND THE NUMBER ONE QUOTE IS

"See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time."
Robin Williams

 


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