If they can put one man on the moon, why not all of them?
Equality is a myth - woman are better!
All the women moaning about finding a husband have obviously never had one.
The average man is proof that women can take a joke!
Q: What do you call a man who's lost 95% of his brain?
A: A widower!
Q. What's the fastest way to a man's heart?
A. Through his chest with a sharp knife!
Q. Why are men and parking spaces alike?
A. Because all the good ones are gone and the only ones left are disabled.
Q. Why are men like public toilets?
A. Because all the good ones are engaged and the only ones left are full of shit.
Q. What have men and floor tiles got in common?
A. If you lay them properly the first time, you can walk all
over them for life.
Q. How can you tell if a man is happy?
A. Who cares?
Q. What is the difference between a man and a catfish?
A. One is a bottom-feeding scum-sucker and the other is a fish.
Q. Why do men want to marry virgins?
A. They can't stand criticism.
Q. What are two reasons why men don't mind their own business?
A. 1. No mind. 2. No business.
Q. Did you hear about the banker who's a great lover?
A. He knows first-hand the penalty for early withdrawal.
Q. Why are men like laxatives?
A. They irritate the shit out of you.
Q. Why do men name their penises?
A. Because they want to be on a first-name basis with
the person who makes all their decisions.
Q. Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive,
caring, and good-looking?
A. Because those men already have boyfriends.
Q. Why do men like masturbation?
A. Its sex with someone they love.
Q. What's the difference between a porcupine and a BMW?
A. The porcupine has pricks on the outside.
Q. What is a man's view of safe sex?
A. A padded headboard.
Q. Why were men given larger brains than dogs?
A. So they wouldn't hump women's legs at cocktail parties.
Q. Why do men love computers?
A. No matter what mood they're in, they can still get a floppy in.
Q. What's the difference between a clitoris and a pub?
A. 9 out of 10 men can find a pub!
Q. What's the difference between a woman and a computer??
A. A woman would never accept a 3 1/2 inch floppy!!
...and a computer can't turn a 3.5" floppy into a hard drive
in a matter of seconds...
January 13, 1998