What He Hopes... and Is Afraid You're Thinking About Sex

During Kissing/Light Petting:
What he hopes you're thinking: "Oh, I can't resist: I'm powerless before your seductive ways!"

What he's afraid you're thinking: "Garlic breath--ewwww!"

While Undressing:
What he hopes you're thinking: "My God, look at the size of that!"

What he's afraid you're thinking: "My God, look at the size of that!"

During Foreplay/Oral Sex:
What he hopes you're thinking: "I could worship at the alter of your impressive manhood for hours."

What he's afraid you're thinking: "If he doesn't warn me before he comes,I'm going to kill him."

At Penetration:
What he hopes you're thinking: "You stallion, you're splitting me in half!"

What he's afraid you're thinking: "Is it in yet?"

During Your Orgasm:
What he hopes you're thinking: "Yes, (his name here), yes!"

What he's afraid you're thinking: "I deserve an Academy Award for this performance."

What he's even more afraid you're thinking: "Yes, (other guy's name here),yes!"

During Postcoital Bliss:
What he hopes you're thinking: "Now I know what an earthquake feels like."

What he's afraid you're thinking: "Maybe I should let my lesbian friend Sue take me to that females-only dance club after all."