during your initial consultation he tries to sell you Amway.
he tells you that his last good case was a "Budweiser".
the prosecutors see who your lawyer is, they high-five each other.
he picks the jury by playing "duck-duck-goose".
a prison guard is shaving your head.
every couple of minutes he yells, "I call Jack Daniels to the stand!" and proceeds to drink a shot.
he places a large "No Refunds" sign on the defense table.
just before he says "Your Honor", he makes those little quotation marks in the air with his fingers.
the sign in front of his law office reads "Practicing Law Since 2:25 PM.
whenever his objection is overruled, he tells the judge, "Whatever".
he giggles every time he hears the word "briefs".
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