Long long ago, in a land far away,

There lived a man name Mike—

Or ‘Twinkle Toes’, they say.

He had a huge fondness for bowling and sluffing.

The people that knew him were sure he was fluffing!

He barely had money,

But he had a nice car,

And his personality, like demons, he kept in a jar.

One day, at the office, his boss told him, “Twink!

I really must say it! At your job you just STINK!

You are uneducated, you’re a waste, you’re a slob-

So be GONE with you, Twink! Go and find a new job.”

So Twink did some thinking, ‘How can I survive?’

‘WHY! I'll scam the ladies, with my charm and a bribe’.

Yes, Twink did some thinking !

He was fast on his feet,

‘Ohhh! Scamming the ladies will be a REAL treat!’

So faster than lightening he put his 'plan' in motion-

‘These ladies are EASY! HEY!! I have a new notion!’

To his computer he flew, like a Superman, with not a care in the world.

'OH Yes! this will work- a great place to find a new target..er..uh.. girl!'

The computer was on, now, 'How do I work this kuntrapshun??'

He finally got logged on, and put his plan into action.

‘Ahhh! Yes! This is it! what a wonderful plan!

They will never find out that my life is a scam!

I need a sugar momma, I need lots of MONEY!

I will call them sweet names, like snookums, and bunny!

I'm a tad lazy, so let's let someone else work!

I'll be just fine, if they don't find out

I’m a jerk!’

At first, it seemed, the ladies all fell for his act.

He would take them for granted -stab them in the back.

He called them all names, and made them feel little-

His belligerent attitude, it was astounding; his heart- it was brittle.

Until, as fate would have it, he tried to scam the wrong gal.

She had two wise sisters, and one smart gal pal.

They dispelled his cockamamie stories, his lies and his plans,

They told his new gal-friend he was a ‘small man’.

Yet Twink weaved his web around her-

She fell for his crap!

You should have seen him! OH GAWD! What a sap!

While his day was coming, Twink had time to milk off her money,

And this was a sad fact, cuz she was a real honey!

While she was working, he had a jolly good time!

But HIM WORK? Are you KIDDING? Oh MY! What a crime!

So instead, he squeezed the teats of the old money bag,

He squeezed them and squeezed them till they started to sag!

He scuba’d –

Parachuted -

And swam in the pool-

He dined out a lot when he was rid of his ‘gal-fool’.

He tinkered and dawdled, and found his new FAME!

Why he even had time to bowl a few frames!

He went to the circus,

He caught a peepshow –

There was NO DOUBT about it, this guy was a HO!

It took time to convince her, but it finally did work.

Her gal-friends finally convinced her that Twink was a jerk!

His gal-pal was extremely HOT under the collar!

This scum would do ANYTHING for a dollar!

She collected her thoughts, and made a plan of her own!

This jerk of a man would find a NEW HOME!

The moral of this story is quite clear to see –

You can’t fool us all, Twink!

Go piss up a TREE!

THE END!

Take me HOME

Disclaimer:

All Flintstone pictures are property of Hanna Barbara, and other artwork the property of page owner.

Please note that this page may have been designed under the inspiration of a past experience,

and the pictures and overall story line *may* or *may not* resemble the actual character in this story, but rest assured, every precaution was taken to give you the gist.