This was a responce to a question a friend asked me "Why do you believe in God?". I think my responce kind of says the bulk of what I'd want to say right now in my life, so you can read that. :) [Note: "right now in my life" equates to February 2002. Faith is a constantly evolving thing, at least for me, so I don't know that I'd necessarily abide by this now. But I also know I may not keep updating it every time I have a major (or subtle) shift.]
Why do I believe in God? Good question, and thanks for asking it, I think I should have to answer this at least for myself. :)
While I mull this over, here's one for you: Do you think that your agnostic beleifs are coloring your view of Christianity? What about other religions? Why? And as a side note, where you raised in a Christian setting?
*time passes*
I suppose there are a few reasons I believe in God (or a Deity, use whatever name you like; I sometimes like to use Big Bertha).
First, I was raised to believe in God. But then, I was raised to be Baptist and I've pretty much tossed most of those belief structures. :-P So I guess that's not quite a good enough reason.
I have had personal experiences that I can't describe any other way than as a higher power. sometimes it really feels like another presence that is separate from me, yet at the same time a part of me (this is confusing). things have happened in my life that to me appear to be of a Divine or other worldly source. Sometimes it's been a sudden help when I didn't think there could be any (like the time I drove my car into a ditch backing out of a driveway on a hill), sometimes it's been an answer to a question or a request (the stopping of the wind for a time so I could do some candlework), sometimes it's been just the full experience of a ceremony or ritual or intensly religous/spiritual moment. Sometimes meditation.
I guess the best I can say is personal experience. At the same time, I know that my experiences are not like any others. I'm sure that Matthew experiences God in a different manner than I do (there may be similarities, but there are enough differences to make it unique). When I started studying Wicca I came across and interesting analogy. God is like a diamond with many many facets. Depending on the facet you look through you see a different angle of God, a different view. But you're still looking at the same God. to take this a step further, I would say that sometimes people look through a facet the wrong way and get not just a different view of God, but sometimes a skewed view (example: hate groups saying they are acting out "God's will"; that's a bunch of bull shit, they're acting out their own hate with validation they don't understand). Another example: I heard someone once suggest that Hitler had been the recipient of a Divine idea: the cleansing of the human race. The problem was he misinterpreted it and thought it was a cleansing of the Aryan race (whoops...).
I liked your analogy the other day equating God with truth with everything that is. When I was working out of my long held Baptist beliefs one of the things I struggled with was how could all religions have merit, not just Christianity, and along with that, what about Hell? I had a really hard time with both of these concepts. What I finally came to understand was that every religious path, or lack of religious path, has elements of truth in it and a different way of relating to the spiritual (or not relating, as the case may be). (also, I relized that Hell is part human construct, and part something that happens while we're alive, not when we die, but if you want that one explained, ask and i'll send in a different email) One Christian sect that I REALLY like is the Unity Church, which I've become an active member of here in Cookeville. Their only requirement is that you uphold Christ's greatest teachings: to love God and to love each other. Then to act within those principles of love. The expression, the form, is irrelevent. There's a lot of focus on personal growth and awareness, which also really appeals to me. But no doctrine. If you'd like to give it a try sometime, you're more than welcome to join me and Matthew (services are 11 on Sundays). Or if not, that's fine, too. :)
Hmm...I feel like I've tangeted a large bit. Well, I have. I guess I feel like along with saying why I believe in God, it's good for me to go through and describe what I believe as well. I haven't had to spell it out in a while, and I think it's good to revisit periodically. :) Who knows? Perhaps a few years from now I'll have yet another view (it has changed several times in the last three years).
thanks for the questions. Let me know if you have any responces to the questions I've been posing. :)