>  > 1.  Save all manner of bacon grease. You will be instructed
>  >     later how to use it.
>  >
>  > 2.  Just because you can drive on snow and ice does not mean
>  >     we can.  Stay home the two days of the year it snows.
>  >
>  > 3.  If you do run your car into a ditch, don't panic.  Four
>  >     men in the cab of a four wheel drive with a 12-pack of
>  >     beer and a tow chain will be along shortly.  Don't try
>  >     to help them.  Just stay out of their way.  This is what
>  >     they live for.
>  >
>  > 4.  Don't be surprised to find movie rentals and bait in the
>  >     same store.
>  >
>  > 5.  Remember: "Y'all" is singular.  "All y'all" is plural.
>  >     "All y'all's" is plural possessive.
>  >
>  > 6.  Get used to hearing, "You ain't from around here, are you?"
>  >
>  > 7.  Don't be worried that you don't understand anyone.  They
>  >     don't understand you either.
>  >
>  > 8.  Northerners can be identified by the spit on the inside
>  >     of their car's windshield that comes from yelling at other
>  >     drivers.
>  >
>  > 9.  If you are yelling at the person driving 15 mph in a 55
>  >     mph zone, directly in the middle of the road, remember,
>  >     many folks learned to drive on a model of vehicle known
>  >     as John Deere, and this is the proper speed and lane
>  >     position for the vehicle.
>  >
>  > 10. If you hear a Southerner exclaim, "Hey, y'all, watch this!"
>  >     Stay out of his way.  These are likely the last words he
>  >     will ever say.
>