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Table of Contents
Buddy & Me Fiona and Sebastian Chris,Deanna,Fiona, Sebastian
Deanna's First Ticket Facts about your Automobile Al's Lighter Side
Pauline's Poetry Corner My Favorite Homesites Chat downloads
All About Me Please Send me an Email Sign my Guest Book
Meet My Cat (Chessa) Meet My Other Cats My Mission Statement
Pandora's Box Just me Fish Stories
Mary's Home Away From Home



ME

The following covers my birth, my earlier years, and my mature years. I pull no punches, I tell my good parts and my not so good parts. I give my heritage, which I am very proud of, and my legacy, some of which I am not proud of. My proudest moments are those of teaching and I tell how I feel about this subject. I beg a little, Instructor for sale! Please buy me! Last, but not least, I puff out my hood and brag.

I have my original paint job with some greying on top, also has original parts. Parts are no worst for wear. Sheetmetal has no rust. However, electronic ignition does. Must see to appreciate. This model is a hybrid. The motor is German, the body is Hungarian, with miscellaneous small parts from Ireland and Poland. This model is one of a kind, a classic, if you will. Highly educated. Spent earlier years in Pennsylvania. In those years I was rode hard and put away wet! Went to high school, Junior High school, and elementary school in Pennsylvania. Model was not highly motivated during the early years of education. However, this model did real well during the college years. I received an AAB at Kent State University and a BS degree at Lake Erie College. Last, but not least, I received an MBA at Tampa College.

Has full head of hair. However, grill work is detachable (sometimes referred to as dentures). Looks good. Model has never really been delightful to look at, although, just, ask its female creator and she will tell you just how handsome this model really is. Model comes with it's own spare tire, which changes in size from time to time. Presently the spare tire is rather small, However, the spare has never been used.

Some of my defects are found within. My tires are size 14. I have problems with my cooling system and sometimes run rather hot. A few places on my exterior are beginning to peel. Also, my spark plugs don't seem to spark all the time and sometimes spark when I don't want them too. Other then the afore-mentioned, this model is in good shape.

This model has add on accessories and is very adept on using its accessories. The model comes with a computer road-map, WordPerfect, Microsoft Word, Lotus 1-23, dBASE III PLUS, Basic, Cobal, Fortran, and HTML programing, and various others. Knows Windows 95 and Windows 3.1, DOS, and CPM. Also, this model has the capability to teach other models how to use computers. It is well attuned to computers and able to show other models how to use computers in their work.

I like to think of myself as a roadster, however, I really am a four door sedan. I am a real pavement pounder, a workaholic if you will. I can go from zero to sixty in that many years. I come with a 10 year money back guarantee. If I don't outperform any model, return me within those 10 years and get your money back. I also come with a limited lifetime performance replacement warranty. Should I ever fail to perform to your satisfaction, for your life or 10 years, whichever comes first, I will be replaced with a newer model absolutely free.

I have a room, that's so cozy and neat, where all of my friends can come and meet! It's wallpapered with sunshine and smiles, Laughter and chatter, that always beguiles!! Thoughts and ideas, that go round and round, Without ever touching, on solid ground! Please enter my room and browse around.
Pauline Banning W3-909-Nove-97-D7





Fascinating Facts About Your Automobile

1906 Model F Buick

  • As of 1972, there were fewer than 2,000 automobiles in the entire country of Albania.

  • For every 50 miles driven in an Automobile, a person has a one-in-a-million chance of being killed in a motoring accident.

  • Most American automobile horns beep in the key of F.

  • In 1924 a Ford Automobile cost $265.

  • The high roofs of London taxicabs were originally designed to keep gentlemen from knocking off their top hats as they entered and left the vehicles.

  • The price of the average American automobile doubled during the ten-year period between 1968 and 1978.

  • In 1950 the United States had 70 percent of all the automobiles, buses, and trucks in the entire world.

  • In 1905 the Bosco Company of Akron, Ohio, marketed a "collapsible Rubber Automobile Driver." The figure, deflated and kept under the seat when not in use, was a kind of dummy intended to scare theives away when the car was parked.

  • The first automobile race ever seen in the United States was held in Chicago in 1895. The track ran from Chicago to Evanston. The winner was J. Frank Duryea, whose average speed was seven and a half miles per hour.

  • In 1906 a car known as the Autocar was manufactured in the United States with a new invention--headlights(they burned kerosene). The Autocar, however, lacked another important accessory--the steering wheel. The driver directed the vehicle by means of a sticklike shaft situated to the right of the driver's seat.

  • The Buick, the first automobile manufacture by the General Motors Corporation, was actually built by a man named David Buick. Buick, a plumber, by trade, also invented a process whereby porcelain could be annealed onto iron, hence making possible the production of the while porcelain bathtub.

**David Louis, "2201 Fascinating Facts" (New York: Greenwich House, 1983), pp. 208-210.




PANDORA'S BOX

The Fate of Baby the Pony
Come into Deanna's basement
Honesty is important
Grass or Children
Points to Ponder
Inventions
A winter scene
The difference between the sexes
The creation
A Letter From God
A Poem about Happiness
The Power of a Smile
Procrastinator's Creed
Must reading for computer people
Sorry, Officer.
Application to Join The Maffa
What is a Grandmother?
Symptoms of Inner Peace
Caffeine Addict's Quiz
Twenty Keys To A Happy Life
Ranching Days
Life In An Igloo
Email! How high can you go?
Information Please?
Faceless Friends
A Lovely Prayer









Al's Lighter Side

Blinking jokes are
New Years Resolutions
How to get a good night's sleep
What kids say about marriage
Ain't it the truth
How to tell if you drank too much coffee
How can you tell if you drank too much
How I know Computers are Females
Childrens gratitude to bus driver
Points to Ponder
Pastor's visit
Forgot to Breath
Why certain things happen in Cartoons
Heavenly HMO
More funny sayings
Shortest books in the world
How Do you know your are giving birth to Septuples
Bumper Stickers
College habits to leave at college
Just Don't Start Something
A prayer for a good meal
Idiots are everywhere
How to tell if you are addicted to the net
Thank you form from McDonnell Douglas
How can you tell if your in the Medical Field
Headlines for the year
Husband's fishing trip
Having computer problems
How to drive other drivers crazy
Funny messages to put on your answering machine
Question from First time skydiver
To skip or not to skip
Church Bulletin Bloopers
Bad Puns
What makes stock rise or fall?
Laws
Excuse Me
Eulogy for Pop-N-Fresh
Tickets, Please
Shipwrecked
A Jerk Like you
So that's how they do it!
Murphy's Law Of Computing


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My collection of cats


Pauline's Poetry Corner






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