grass
The Green, Green Grass of Home
by Erma Bombeck, written November 1971
When Mike was 2, he wanted a sandbox, and his
father said:
"There goes the yard. We'll have kids over here
day and
night, and they'll throw sand into the flower
beds, and cats
will make a mess in it, and it'll kill the grass
for sure."
And Mike's mother said, "It'll come back."
When Mike was 5, he wanted a jungle gym set with
swings that
would take his breath away and bars to take him
to the summit,
and his father said: "Good grief, I've seen those
things in
back yards, and do you know what they look like?
Mud holes in
a pasture. Kids digging their gym shoes in the
ground. It'll kill
the
grass."
And Mike's mother said, "It'll come back."
Between breaths, when Daddy was blowing up the
plastic swimming
pool, he warned: "You know what they're going
to do to this
place? They're going to condemn it and use it
for a missile site.
I hope you know what you're doing. They'll track
water everywhere
and have a million water fights, and you won't
be able to take
out the garbage without stepping in mud up to
your neck. When we
take this down, we'll have the only brown lawn
on the block."
"It'll come back," Mike's mother said.
When Mike was 12, he volunteered his yard for
a campout. As they
hoisted the tents and drove in the spikes, his
father stood at the
window and observed, "Why don't I just put the
grass seed out in
cereal bowls for the birds and save myself the
trouble of spreading
it around? You know for a fact that those tents
and all those big
feet are going to trample down every single blade
of grass, don't
you. Don't bother to answer. I know what you're
going to say.
'It'll come back.'"
The basketball hoop on the side of the garage
attracted more crowds
than the Olympics. And a small patch of lawn
that started out with
a barren spot the size of a garbage can lid soon
drew to encompass
the entire side yard.
Just when it looked as if the new seed might
take root, the winter
came and the sled runners beat it into ridges.
Mike's father shook
his head and said, "I never asked for much in
this life - only a
patch of grass."
And his wife smiled and said, "It'll come back."
The lawn this fall was beautiful. It was green
and alive and
rolled out like a sponge carpet along the drive
where gym shoes had
trod ... along the garage where bicycles used
to fall ... and
around the flower beds where little boys used
to dig with
iced-tea spoons.
But Mike's father never saw it. He anxiously
looked beyond the
yard and asked with a catch in his voice, "he
will come back, won't
he?"
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