All telephone numbers in America begin with the digits 555.

Most dogs are immortal.

If being chased through town, you can usually take cover in
a passing St. Patrick's Day parade - at any time of the
year.

All beds have special L-shaped cover sheets which reach up
to the armpit level on a woman but only to waist level on
the man lying beside her.

All grocery shopping bags contain at least one stick of
French Bread.

It's easy for anyone to land a plane providing there is
someone in the control tower to talk you down.

Once applied, lipstick will never rub off - even while scuba
diving.

The ventilation system of any building is the perfect hiding
place. No-one will ever think of looking for you in there
and you can travel to any other part of the building you
want without difficulty.

If you need to reload your gun, you will always have more
ammunition -even if you haven't been carrying any before
now.

You're very likely to survive any battle in any war unless
you make the mistake of showing someone a picture of your
sweetheart back home.

Should you wish to pass yourself off as a German officer, it
will not be necessary to speak the language. A bad German
accent will do.

If your town is threatened by an imminent natural disaster
or killer beast, the mayor's first concern will be the
tourist trade or his forthcoming art exhibition.

The Eiffel Tower can be seen from any window in Paris.

A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious
beating but will wince when a woman tries to clean his
wounds.

If a large pane of glass is visible, someone will be thrown
through it before long.

When paying for a taxi, don't look at your wallet as you
take out a bill-just grab one at random and hand it over. It
will always be the exact fare.

Interbreeding is genetically possible with any creature from
else- where in the universe.

Kitchens don't have light switches. When entering a kitchen
at night, you should open the fridge door and use that light
instead.

If staying in a haunted house, women should investigate any
strange noises in their most revealing underwear.

Word processors never display a cursor on screen but will
always say :Enter Password Now.

Mothers routinely cook eggs, bacon and waffles for their
family every morning even though their husband and children
never have time to eat it.

Cars that crash will almost always burst into flames.

A single match will be sufficient to light up a room the
size of RFK Stadium.

Although in the 20th century it is possible to fire weapons
at an object out of our visual range, people of the 23rd
century will have lost this technology.

Any person waking from a nightmare will sit bolt upright and
pant.

It is not necessary to say hello or goodbye when beginning
or ending phone conversations.

Even when driving down a perfectly straight road it is
necessary to turn the steering wheel vigorously from left to
right every few moments.

All bombs are fitted with electronic timing devices with
large red readouts so you know exactly when they're going to
go off.

It is always possible to park directly outside the building
you are visiting.

A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended
from duty.

If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone you
bump into will know all the steps.

Most laptop computers are powerful enough to override the
communication systems of any invading alien civilization.

It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight
involving martial arts - your enemies will wait patiently to
attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening
manner until you have knocked out their predecessors.

When a person is knocked unconscious by a blow to the head,
they will never suffer a concussion or brain damage.

No-one involved in a car chase, hijacking, explosion,
volcanic eruption or alien invasion will ever go into shock.

Police Departments give their officers personality tests to
make sure they are deliberately assigned a partner who is
their total opposite.

When they are alone, all foreigners prefer to speak English
to each other.

You can always find a chainsaw when you need one.

Any lock can be picked by a credit card or a paper clip in
seconds -unless it's the door to a burning building with a
child trapped inside.

An electric fence, powerful enough to kill a dinosaur will
cause no lasting damage to an eight year old child.

Television news bulletins usually contain a story that
affects you personally at the precise moment you turn on the
tv.

Judy Michaels
 

Anybody else know things that are not real but happen in the
movies?

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