A young man wanted to purchase a gift for his new sweetheart's birthday, and as they had not been dating very long, after careful consideration, he decided a pair of gloves would strike the right note.....romantic, but not too personal. Accompanied by his sweetheart's younger sister, he went to Norstrom and bought a pair of white gloves. The sister purchased a pair of panties for herself. During the wrapping, the clerk mixed up the items and the sister got the pair of gloves and the sweetheart got the panties. Without checking the contents, the young man sealed the package and sent it to his sweetheart with the following note:
"I chose these because I noticed that you are not in the habit of wearing any when we go out in the evening. If it had not been for your sister, I would have chosen the long ones with the buttons, but she wears short ones that are easier to remove. These are a delicate shade, but the lady I bought them from showed me the pair she had been wearing for the past three weeks and they are hardly soiled. I had her try yours on for me and she looked really smart."
"I wish I was there to put them on for you the first time, as no doubt other hands will come in contact with them before I have a chance to see you again."
"When you take them off, remember to blow in them before putting them away, as they will naturally be a little damp from wearing. Just think how many times I will kiss them during the coming year. I hope you will wear them for me on Friday night. All my love."
"P.S. The latest style is to wear them folded down with a little of the fur
showing." |
"Questions and Answers"
It is truly astonishing what happens in Bible Stories when they are retold
by child-scholars around the world......
In the first of the Bible, Guinessis, God got tired of creating the world,
so He took the Sabbath off. Adam and Eve were created from an apple tree.
Noah's wife was called Joan of Ark. Noah built an ark, which the animals
came onto in pears. Lot's wife was a pillar of salt by day, but a ball of fire at night.
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The Jews were a proud people and throughout history they had trouble with
the unsympathetic Genitals. Samson was a strongman who let himself be led
astray by a Jezebel like Delilah. Samson slayed the Philistines with the
axe of the apostles.
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Moses led the Hebrews to the Red Sea, where they made unleavened bread,
which is bread made without any ingredients. The Egyptians were all drowned
in the dessert. Afterwards, Moses went up to Mount Cyanide to get the Ten
Amendments. The First Commandment was when Eve told Adam to eat the apple.
The Fifth Commandment is to humor thy father and mother. The Seventh
Commandment is thou shalt not admit adultery.
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A patient called last night to check on an account. She explained that she had picked up a condition at the public pool. I asked her what and she said "Everytime I sneeze, I have an orgasm." I asked her what she was doing for it. Her reply "Sniffing Pepper."