One Day at Camelot

King Arthur was getting ready to go on a Quest.  
He was worried about leaving Queen Guinevere alone will all those
horney knights of the Round Table.  So he went to Merlin for some
advice. After explaining his predicament to Merlin, the wizard looked
thoughtful and said to come back in a week and he'd see if he could
come up with something. A week later King Arthur was back in Merlin's
laboratory where the good wizard was showing him his latest invention.
 It was a chastity belt... except it had a rather large hole in the
most obvious place.  "This is no good, Merlin!" the king exclaimed,
"Look at this opening.  How is this supposed to protect m'lady, the
Queen?"

"Ah, sire, just observe."  said Merlin as he searched his cluttered
work bench until he found what he was looking for.  He then selected
his most worn out wand, one that he was going to discard anyway.  He
then inserted it in the gaping aperture of the chastity belt whereupon
a small guillotine blade came down and cut it neatly in two.

"Merlin, you are a genius!" said the greatful monarch, "Now I can
leave, knowing that my Queen is fully protected."

After putting Guinevere in the device, King Arthur then set out upon
his Quest.  Several years passed until he returned to Camelot.
Immediately he assembled all his knights in the courtyard and had them
drop their trousers for an informal 'short arm' inspection.  Sure
enough!  Each and every one of them was either amputated or damaged in
some way.  All of them except Sir Galahadhis .

"Sir Galahadhis ", exclaimed King Arthur, "The one and only true
knight!  Only you among all the nobles have been true to me.  What is
it in my power to grant you?  Name it and it is yours!"

But Sir Galahadhis was speechless....