An amazing Machine
-------------------

A man complained to his friend, "My elbow really hurts, I guess I should
see a doctor".

His friend offered, "Don't do that!!! There's a computer at the drug
store
that can diagnose anything, quicker and cheaper than a doctor. Simply
put in a sample of your urine and the computer will diagnose your
problem and tells you what you can do about it. It only costs $10.00"

The man figured he had nothing to loose, so he filled a jar with a urine
sample and went to the drug store.
Finding the computer, he poured in the sample and deposited the $10.00.
The
computer started making some noises and the various lights started
flashing. After a brief pause, out popped a small slip of paper on which
was printed:

You have tennis elbow.

Soak your arm in warm water.

Avoid heavy labor.

It will be better in two weeks.

Late that evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was and
how it would change medical science forever, he began to wonder if this
machine could be fooled. He
decided to give it a try.

He mixed together some tap water, a stool sample from his dog and urine
samples from his wife and daughter. To top it off, he masturbated into
the concoction. He went to the drug store, located the machine, poured
in the sample and deposited the $10.00. The machine again made the usual
noise and printed out the following analysis:

>Your tap water is too hard
>
>Get a water softener.
>
>Your dog has worms
>
>Give him vitamins.
>
>Your daughter's on drugs,
>
>Put her in rehab.
>
>Your wife's pregnant
>
>It ain't yours---get a lawyer.
>
>And if you don't stop jerking off,
>
>Your tennis elbow will never get better.