What Men Say and What They Mean
  
It is just orange juice, try it.--3 more shots, and she'll have her legs around my head. 

She's kind of cute--I want to bang her till I am blue 

I don't know if I like her--She won't blow me 

I need you--My hand is tired 

I had her--I had (wet dreams about) her all week 

You're the only girl I've ever cared about--You are the only girl who has not rejected me 

I want you back--...for tonight anyway 

We've been through so much together--If it was not for you, I never would 
		have lost my virginity 

I miss you so much--I am so horny that my roommate is starting to look good 

No, I do not want to dance right now--Shoot! She'll know that I have a hard-on 

I am different from all the other guys--I am not circumsized 

I really want to get to know you better--...so I can tell my friends about it 

How do I compare with all your other boyfriends?--Is my penis really that small? 

    "I'm hungry" = I'm hungry.
    
    "I'm tired" = I'm tired.
    
    "I've gotta pee" = Get out of the way.
    
    "I've gotta GO" = Get out of the way and stay away until it clears
    
    "Can I call you sometime?" = I'd eventually like to have sex with you.
    
    "Do you want to go to a movie?" = I'd eventually like to have sex with you.
    
    "Can I take you out to dinner?" = I'd eventually like to have sex with you.
    
    "Can I get your coat?" = I'd eventually like to have sex with you.
    
    "Let me get your door." = I'd eventually like to have sex with you.
    
    "May I have this dance?" = I'd eventually like to have sex with you.
    
    "Nice dress!" = Nice Tits !
    
    "You look tense, let me give you a massage." = I want to fondle you.
    
    "What's wrong?" = I don't see why are you making such a big deal out of this.
    
    "What's wrong?" = What meaningless self-inflicted psychological trauma are you 
		going through now?
    
    "What's wrong?" = I guess sex tonight is out of the question.
    
    "I'm bored." = Do you want to have sex?
    
    "I love you." = Let's have sex now.
    
    "I love you too." = Okay, I said it...we'd better have sex now!
    
    "Good morning." = That was great sex......let's have more!
    
    "See you later." = That was great sex.......let's have more!
    
    "Yes, I like the way you cut your hair." = I liked it better before.
    
    "Yes, I like the way you cut your hair." = $50 and it doesn't look
    		that much different!
    
    "Yes, I like the way you cut your hair." =For $50 they should have
    		GIVEN you hair!
    
    "Let's talk."= I am trying to impress you by showing that I am a
    		deep person and maybe then you'd like to have sex with me.
    
    "Will you marry me?" = I want to make it illegal for you to have sex
    		with other guys.
    
    "Will you marry me?" = I might as well get tax benefits for going
   		through these "talks"
    
    While shopping:
    
    "Yes, that one's nice" = Why do you ask when you aren't going to
    		listen anyway?
    
    "That one looks great on you" = Pick any freakin' dress and let's go home!
    
    "I like that one better." = Pick any freakin' dress and let's go home!
    
    "Uh huh" = Pick any freakin' dress and let's go home!
    
    "Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz" = Pick any freakin' dress and let's go home!
    
    "I don't think that blouse and that skirt go well together." = I am gay.
    
    "It makes you look fat" = I'm really stupid!
   
About Men and Women | University and College | Adults | Little Johnny and Co. | Computers | Engineers
Heaven and Hell | Lists | Miscellaneous
Jokes Main List

Last modified

1