Great Gift Ideas.




    Having trouble picking out the right gift for that special person?  Well, here are some things that I found that are great for anyone on your gift giving list.



The Princess Diana Angel

    How wonderful your will tree look with a winged vision of Princess Diana on top.  Winner of the 1997 "Missed Exploitation of the Year" award.  The perfect gift for any obsessed fan of Diana.  It looks perfect on your tree, or next to your velvet painting of Elvis.


 HERPES

The Gift that Keeps on Giving.



First American Mortgage Rip-Off Financing.

    Are you struggling with debt?  Do you own a house?  Are you wholly incapable of paying your bills?  If you you probably qualify for the First American Mortgage Rip-Off Financing loan.  You can consolidate all of your bills into one low payment so you can buy more and fall further into debt.  Once you're unable to pay back money to us, we'll foreclose on your house and toss you into the gutter.

    Our famous sports figure spokesman urges you, "Get our mortgage and consume you feeble minded dolt!  I'm famous, do as I say!"



The Secrets of Spontaneous Human Combustion
 

    The Secrets of Spontanious Human Combustion is hailed as one of the most enlightening self help series that you can buy.  The Secrets of Spontanious Human Combustion is a great gift for anyone at the office: the overworked secretary, disgruntled mailroom clerk, or ambitious young executive; now they can decrease competition for promotions without all of the hassles of a messy police investigation.

    The Secrets of Spontanious Human Combustion is also terrific for vacations: no more lines at the airport, car rental center, and nothing clears off a beach faster than a fat old guy in speedos bursting into flames.

    And kids love The Secrets of Spontanious Human Combustion too!  An over anxious vice principal is no problem for a child who knows spontaneous human combustion.  And just think how easily your teen will be able to get into a top notch college if everyone else taking the S.A.T. go up like kindling right before your eyes.

    The Secrets of Spontanious Human Combustion is a must have for everyone on your gift giving list.  Spontaneous human combustion is great for any situation:

    The Secrets of Spontanious Human Combustion is a three video set, just 5 easy payments of $59.99 plus shipping and handling.  Everyone should know The Secrets of Spontanious Human Combustion, and now you can.
 

Back to Apocalypse.

1