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March 25, 2000 |
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I awoke today after getting little sleep. Well, technically not little for me really, but little for most people. I think I got about five or six hours of sleep, which is normally enough for me to function on, but not really enough for me to have a nice day.
"Ring… Ring…"Actually, I shouldn't complain. I knew I would have to wake up in a relatively short time. I had plans to spend the day with Lucas, my little brother of sorts… and I did ask him to call.
We had plans to meet for lunch and then just hang out, after that it was pretty open ended. We typically manage to pass the time just fine. He arrived on time. I haven't seen him for some time, since Christmas as a matter of fact. He handed me my Christmas present, he and Dalia get me a set of towels embroidered with a red dragons. Very Cool! I handed him a set of the new Magic: The Gathering preconstructed decks for the Nemesis expansion set. Since I know that he likes the game, every time a new set is released I get him a set.
He wanted to drive. We headed to meet the man. For those of you who are unfamiliar with meeting the man, you have not been to Dixie's Barbecue. Dixie's is a place where they serve barbecue. Not just run of the mill barbecue, it's exceptional barbecue. I'm not kidding, it is simply the best I've had. The propietor, Gene Porter, walks around during business hours with this pot with this reddish-orange paste like spicy sauce and asks, "Who wants to meet the man?". The "man" that he so fondly refers to is the hot sauce. No kidding! To say that this sauce is extraordinarily hot is a vast understatement. The best way to describe this sauce is probably culinary self-mutilation. It is probably one of the most painful experiences that I have had in my life, excluding a kidney stone. Now, I've met the man… more than once, as a matter of fact.
Note: I have a simple approach to eating spicy food. Hot, as in spicy hot, is simply a dimension in taste, like sweetness or saltiness. Too much of one particular flavor is going to detract from the overall appeal of the particular dish. I'll eat spicy food as long as the spiciness contributes to the taste, when it no longer does, I have no particular need to continue to add more heat. I have nothing to prove to myself or anyone else about my manhood. I don't need to eat exceptionally spicy food to prove anything. I suppose that I've outgrown that.I had the Dixie's Special and Lucas had the 520 Special. Lucas met the man; I didn't. I suppose that either he really likes his food spicy, or he still has something to prove; I won't speculate. As for the quality of the food, I cannot overstate that Dixie's has exceptional barbecue, and if you're in town, I highly recommend it.
We talk about a number of things from how his studies are going to what he has been up to lately. I found out during last week's dinner with Trudy that his friend's father passed away. It seems that I've been surrounded by bad news lately. I wanted to know how he was feeling about the whole thing, whether it is a matter of dealing this this man's death or how his friend is dealing with his father's death. I was torn between dwelling in talking to him about the subject and not saying much about it in the case where it didn't really affect him as much. I wanted to be there if he needed me. I suppose I always tell him that, but either he doesn't do this, or he copes with life well.
My father died when I was young. I was also a psychology minor in college. I suppose I'm a little familiar with death. There's a grieving process to go through. It took years to get through some of the residual grieving for my father, and possibly still some more to get through. All I can hope for is that maybe I can provide some comfort, maybe make some sense out of the madness.
I tell him about Pam and what I've been up to, catch up with all that we have been going through over the last few months. At this point, it is a matter of either of us having time to do things. He and I both have busy schedules; we get together when we can.
We went back to my office to play cards… Magic: The Gathering to be specific. Jim is in his office; he came in to work on fixing more bugs. Jim and Lucas are also friends. We stopped by his office to greet him. As for Lucas and I playing cards, it is something we typically do. We chat about things during the game naturally, so it is better than seeing a movie, or watching a sport event, or something where we have to sit quietly or separate. He was boasting that he would be defeating me quite sounding all week, which is, of course, optimistic at very best. Not to say that I'm that good of a player, because I'm not. Historically, however, I've been consistently a better player than he is, I think it is a matter of being both a little more attentive and a fair bit more experienced.
I did end up winning most of the games, of course. Six games to one. After that he wanted to take a break from playing cards and I suggested that we play table tennis.
I'm fairly good at table tennis, not an exceptional player by any stretch of the imagination, but I certainly won't embarrass myself. Naturally, Lucas was boasting that he would defeat me soundly at table tennis as well, despite the fact that he has only played it once in his life.
It's funny. I called Pam on the walk to the next building, where the table sits. Apparently her car won't start since her battery was dead. Maybe she should consider driving a little more requently. [Just a suggestion, Dear…] I have a battery charger and offered to charge her battery. We'd work out the details a little later. Lucas noted that it sounds strange to hear me use terms of endearment with anyone, which I thought was incredibly amusing.
Oh, he lost, of course. I've been developing my topspin game over the course of the past few weeks. He did quite a bit to help me with the consistency of my topspin shot since he instinctively returned it in a good position to return it as such. He really is quite a good player, if you consider that it is his second time playing. He still lost however, similar ratio as the cards. After a while, I stopped tracking my wins. I know that most of you won't believe this, but table tennis can be a fairly good cardio workout. Lucas, a football and swimming athlete, took a break for a few minutes because he was winded.
Dalia called during one of our games, on my cell phone. Apparently, she just got one of his interim report cards and wanted to discuss it with him. I suppose that I can see both of their points, I think I'm precisely between them in age. In a strange sense, I'm both a goofball and fairly straight-laced, so I also identified with both of them. Most of the time, I try not to give advice, just to listen. I suppose that's what I'm good at.
We eventually headed back to my office, which incidentally he suggested I clean up. On the way back, Lucas suggested that Pam and I should double date with he and his girlfriend. Not that I would object, it would actually amuse me quite a bit.
He dropped me off at my place shortly after that. I asked him to call me, at very least occasionally, to let me know how he is doing. He nodded. To be fair, I'm suppose I'm just as guilty about not calling him. He drives off, heading in the wrong direction. He's got a phone; he can call me if he gets lost.
I call Pam shortly after I get home. I think about the number of things that I would need in order to charge the battery. Most of them were at home, but a number of them were at the office. I also noted that she enjoys drinking Gatorade, so I bring a large can of the Gatorade drink mix so she won't be hauling it from the grocery store as frequently. Well, and a number of other things…
Although I had hoped to be a little early, I turned out to get there right about the time I originally speculated. I figured that since it was going to potentially take some time to charge the battery, and it may only take a few minutes to set up, we should try to set that up before dinner.
I went down to her parking spot to examine her car. Sure enough, her battery was dead. I looked around the little parking garage, but found no electrical outlet. I needed an electrical outlet to plug the charger in. So it turns out that we would have to remove the battery from her car, carry it to her balcony (since they recommend a well ventilated place), and charge it there… and that can wait until after dinner.
We went back upstairs to get dinner. I went to wash up. She served dinner. The salad was a delightful mixture of what I speculate is romaine lettuce, some slices of grapefruit, and olives. She served them with lightly toasted bread spread with goat cheese. Very nice. She has a player that holds precisely three CD's and I am obsessive about music; from what I could tell, she had Savage Garden, Sarah McLachlan, Luis Miguel discs.
Appetizers consisted of chicken skewers with a delightful peanut sauce, with a side of peanut sauce and a small side of pickled cucumbers for taste. This is about the time when I realized that some of the chairs on her dining set had arm rests and others didn't. Doesn't that seem a bit strange? It turns out that the chairs on the end have armrests, the other do not. You learn something new everyday. We also briefly talked about which is the best, as in most efficient, way to take the chicken off the skewer. I think we decided that the cleanest way was to twist the meat off the skewer.
The entrée was sweet and sour pork. It was very good. It was Thai style, so the pork was sliced and not deep fried the way it often is with Chinese cuisine. It had thin slices of carrots and slivers of other vegetables… and chunks of pineapple. Yep, warm pineapple. I've had a number of discussions about warm fruit, not to say that I dislike it really… I just think it is a bit strange.
Shortly after dinner, we wandered back down to the garage to remove the battery from her car. I first unbolted the battery terminals. While I unbolted the two fasteners, she looked at me quizzically asked if I knew what I was doing. [Oh, yes… Thank you for that vote of confidence.] I just looked over with a very dry look; she smiled in amusement. I removed the battery a few short minutes after and carried it upstairs. We started charging it at about 10pm.
We had some time to kill before the battery would be fully charged, about 1am or so. I held her for a while. She likes being held closely, while she drifts off to sleep. I normally don't sleep until a few hours later; I'm not what you would call a day person. I also continue to run until I'm exhausted and fall asleep when my mind and body forces me. As she sleeps and I hold her, my mind drifts and wanders. I'm not used to being passive. I feel a little guilty about the many things that I feel I'm neglecting. I think of the way Jim comes in on a Saturday to catch up on fixing bugs or the way Trudy stays up late on Saturday even after dinner with us working on a presentation for work. I know how much she treasures the quiet comfortable time with me. I'm torn between being there for her, and the guilt of losing hours of my time while I lay there holding her. We talked about it briefly. I don't think there are any immediate or easy solutions.
March 25, 2000