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August 17, 2000 |
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I received a rather strange e-mail today. It was in one of the accounts that I don't use very frequently, so I had a fair amount of SPAM mail. Okay, for you people who spam, even if I were interested in your product, I would never follow the link in your mail. I don't do this for the principle. I'm funny that way. Antiways, I was sorting through my array of mail when I ran into this one:
From: random-person@aol.comOkay, ordinarily I simply ignore mis-sent e-mail. However, I got visions of this young woman, who incidentally does not know how to spell "til", waiting for a reply from her love interest and rapidly approach panic as the days go by and her mail remains unanswered. So I did the rational thing to do. I answered her mail:
To: My address
Subject: hey
Date: Thu, 17 Aug 2000 20:30:36 EDT
hey what's up? Jessica said you are cheating on me I know and hope it's not true. I think she might be jealous. oh well, I can't wait tell school. and I can't wait to see you!
love
laura
Hi LauraIt's not that I like playing with people's heads. Don't get me wrong, I do enjoy playing with people's heads, but that's not why I do it.
As incredibly charming as you are, I'm afraid to tell you that I have indeed been seeing another woman. I met her a few months ago; her name is Pam and she really is quite wonderful
Sorry, I didn't tell you before, but I didn't know you until your stray mail landed in my inbox. Normally, I would simply ignore it, but I figured you would want to know.
Hugs,
-Frank.
ps. Give my regards to Jessica.
I went back to kickboxing today. You know what? It sucked. Granted it didn't suck as badly as I would've anticipated, but it still sucked. One of the problems was that I was wearing these running shorts that, although fine for running, tend to ride up when you do the kicks. Picture me doing the kicks during the class and stopping between combinations to adjust my shorts.
Oh, sorry… am I oversharing?
Luckily I was near the back of the class, since I had wondered in a little late, and didn't subject too many people to watching me pull my shorts down during the session.
The session was nearly empty at the start, and it didn't fill up that much. There were perhaps a dozen people, including a particularly cute and tone blonde woman in the center of the class. Okay, before I get flamed here. First, I'm not the type of guy that goes to a cardio class to meet women. The only woman that I've struck up a conversation with is the instructor, and that was just to order equipment, ask questions, or make comments. Second, I don't stare at women when in class; I'm here to exercise. Having said that, if there happens to be a beautiful woman immediately in front of me who I see while trying to follow the instructor, I'm going to take notice. I'm only human.
I'm not sure what our instructor has in mind, since she seems to be concentrating more on the sequence of moves rather than the exercise. Maybe she's trying to alleviate the boredom that would set in after doing some very repetitive moves, but you can see half struggling to follow the combinations of kicks and punches. I mean, you don't want to lose us either. Towards the end you have this collection of mostly uncoordinated people trying to follow along, lucky if they don't collide in mid-air.
With the exception of being fatigued, I thought I did pretty well. Granted my kicks and punches weren't as crisp as they could be, but all in all, I was pretty coordinated. The young blonde woman in the front of the class seemed to be holding up pretty well too.
We spent too much time in the aerobics room, since there was a class immediately following and they looked like they were getting pretty agitated. Well, not really, but they were waiting. Once we finally got out, I grabbed my stuff, walked towards the instructor, and thanked her for teaching the class. She introduced the young woman to some of us as her niece, which suddenly made me feel like a dirty old man, at the tender age of thirty-two.
August 17, 2000