It has been suggested more than once that I may have the messiest office on campus (that meaning work). I personally doubt that I live up to that distinction for a couple of reasons. First, my company employs thousands of people; the odds grow slimmer with numbers. Second, my office simply isn't that messy. Here is a picture of me working diligently (stop laughing!) at my desk. While I confess that most items in my office do tell a story, I won't go into the individual details of each item. I have made a list of most personal items in my office. If nothing else, the list will entertain you. The one key missing item is a noose that use to hang from the ceiling directly above my head. One of my friends saw it and was amused by it, so I offered it to her. Rest assured that she is not the type to hang herself (others?... Maybe). Well, finally here it is; the contents of the dungeon:

• basketball hoop (Mickey Mouse type, one that hangs from the door)
• Atlanta Braves plastic locker
• M&M dispenser (shaped like green plain M&M character) filled with Reese's pieces
• Johnson & Johnson hair detangler (12 oz, works okay)
• Kenwood CD changer (6+1 model) and remote
• hot pink de-tangling comb
• hot chili paste
• two emery boards
• frisbee
• pair of Infinity two-way speakers
• Nerf ammo
  • 45+ 3" suction-cup darts
  • 4 2" suction-cup darts
  • 4 suction-cup arrows
  • 12 regular arrows
• baseball mitt
• sewing machine oil
• vase
• Magic Genie (Djin) lamp with Genie inside
• Tigger action figure
• waterskin
• purple fold-away hair brush
• Kenwood Amplifier/Receiver
• watch (with company logo)
• electronic talking parrot
• eleven yo-yos
  • two Atlanta Braves yo-yos (which I got for my birthday, one still unopened).
  • one Terminator
  • one Pro-Yo II
  • two Tom Kuhn's Flying Camels yo-yos (one standard, one butterfly)
  • one Rainbow yo-yo.
  • one Roller Woody ball bearing yo-yo.
  • one Silver Bullet aluminum yo-yo.
  • one SB 2 aluminum ball bearing yo-yo.
  • one Duncan classic wooden yo-yo.
• remote control (to a computer I no longer have)
• bicycle helmet
• twenty bottles
  • one Yellowstone Whiskey (gift, still unopened)
  • fifteen empty beer bottles
  • four misc. empty bottles
• talking box (says any one of a number of phrases when picked up)
• plastic gray whale
• set of Christmas lights
• slinky (with company logo)
• pair of drumsticks
• four Nerf weapons
  • Max Force handgun type (I can't remember the name)
  • Chainblazer
  • Eagle Eye
  • Manta Ray
• plastic leg bone
• two pillows
• motorcycle helmet
• two blankets
• wooden desk pen/pencil holder shaped like the word "Frank"
• 1997 wall calendar (Len's Automotive, they do excellent work!)
• four mugs (and I don't drink coffee or tea)
  • Mickey Mouse (gift, black with Mickey Silhouettes, very cool)
  • Hanna Barbera (gift, very cool with a bunch of the HB characters)
  • two others I got from work.
• Florida snow globe (we'll overlook that it doesn't normally snow in Florida)
• small glass jug with sand and seashells (with the message "Own your own Florida Beach Front Property")
• three toothbrushes (one travelling, fold-away type)
• three outdated desk calendars (two Dave Barry and one Garfield)
• basketball (for the above mentioned hoop)
• four spools of dental floss
• potting soil
• lucite block
• two kazoos
• plant (a poinsettia, which never turned red)
• tube of toothpaste (4.6 oz, Crest tartar control, fresh mint gel)
• futon
• four clocks
  • Mickey Mouse wall clock
  • monocromatic desk/wall clock that runs counterclockwise (very cool) even the word "QUARTZ" is backwards
  • brass clock for my five year aniversary at work
  • wall clock for finishing one of our products
• sign (Garfield, "Life and death decisions made while you wait")
• clipboard (plastic, clear)
• nail-clippers
• outdated checkbook
• two tins of Altoids, one empty
• two pots, neither with plants, one with soil
• power putty
• pair of Tigger slippers
• plant-watering decanter
• two Florida license plates
  • Challenger
  • University of Miami Hurricanes
• tube of Aloe Vera Gel (4 oz, Fruit of the Earth)
• Disney World Mickey Mouse "Ears" cap (with my name "Frank")
• clip-on fan
• five bottles of bubble fluid (one is 64 oz)
• glow-in-the-dark magic wand (from the Magic Shop on Main Street at Disney World)
• B'etor action figure (female Klingon)
• bookmark (Garfield)
• can opener
• Mickey Mouse backscratcher
• calculator
• handheld bubble gun (as with bubble fluid)
• box of styrofoam peanuts
• lawn chair
• pair of ski poles (did I mention that I don't ski?)
• tracer projector (this is really cool gizmo)
• baseball
• pair of prescription glasses
• pair of latex gloves
• spool of twine
• pair of skiing sunglasses
• two laminated maps
  • Magic Kingdom (Walt Disney World) map
  • Florida perspective map
• Duncan yo-yo trick book
• drinking straw (spiral, with Dopey, one of the seven dwarves)
• bullhorn (battery powered, which also plays some tunes) Naturally, I like playing Taps the best
• icicles (yes, the kind that you put on Christmas trees)
• eleven stuffed animals
  • Ren and Stimpy
  • Mickey Mouse in World War II bomber outfit (with jacket, goggles, and cap)
  • Lisa Simpson
  • Tiny Toon (don't know which one)
  • dinosaur (no, not Barney)
  • Teddy bear (which I made from the Teddy Bear Kit. Yes... really!)
  • Garfield
  • Eeyore (he's on my monitor. Oh my! He really does looks miserable!)
  • large Wile E. Coyote (who I occasionally strap to the passenger seat of my car).
  • bean bag creature that burps when thrown at something
• set of three juggling balls
• ten drinking coolers

February 1, 1998