If you live in the United Kingdom, I am sure you are aware of the extremely high frequency that George Michael is played on the radio. It has become increasingly difficult to avoid hearing him, these days. He is everywhere you go: The radio, the stores in which you shop, and even the beggers in the subways are playing George Michael songs for money!

Now, think about which George Michael songs you hear. In total, basically all of them, but, for the most part, it is three main songs: "Fast Love", "Freedom", and "Outside". If you listen to the radio, you cannot go for even one day without hearing at least one of these songs. You can run, but you can't hide! Try changing the station, and you'll be doomed to hear him again, somewhere else, at some point in that same day.

While this may simply seem annoying, it is actually a world-wide disaster! George Michael is actually causing the coming Apocalypse. Forget the four horsemen; when you hear all three of those songs within the same 24-hour period, that is a sign that the Apocalypse is near. (Listening to George Michael CD's does not count toward this phenomenon; that is simply an expression of bad taste.)

I, myself, have warned the DJ's at Virgin Radio of their part in helping along such a disaster, but they did not want to listen. I was put on the air on XFM, though, warning listeners. If you would like to join the campaign, please write to: got_answers@hotmail.com, and together we might be able to rid the world of this great evil.