Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness

Disc 1: dawn to dusk

    mellon collie and the infinite sadness
    tonight, tonight
    jellybelly
    zero
    here is no why
    bullet with butterfly wings
    to forgive
    fuck you (an ode to no one)
    love
    cupid de locke
    galapogos
    muzzle
    porcelina of the vast oceans
    take me down

Disc 2: twilight to starlight

    where boys fear to tread
    bodies
    thirty-three
    in the arms of sleep
    1979
    tales of a scorched earth
    thru the eyes of ruby
    stumbleine
    x.y.u.
    we only come out at night
    beautiful
    lily (my one and only)
    by starlight
    farewell and goodnight

      Disc 1: dawn to dusk

      mellon collie and the infinite sadness

      (instrumental)

      tonight, tonight

      time is never time at all
      you can never ever leave without leaving a piece of youth
      and our lives are forever changed
      we will never be the same
      the more you change the less you feel
      believe, believe in me, believe
      that life can change, that you're not stuck in vain
      we're not the same, we're different tonight
      tonight, so bright
      tonight
      and you know you're never sure
      but you're sure you could be right
      if you held yourself up to the light
      and the embers never fade in your city by the lake
      the place where you were born
      believe, believe in me, believe
      in the resolute urgency of now
      and if you believe there's not a tonight
      tonight, so bright
      tonight
      we'll crucify the insincere tonight
      we'll make things right, we'll feel it all tonight
      we'll find a way to offer up the night tonight
      the indescibable moments of your life tonight
      the impossible is possible tonight
      believe in me as i believe in you, tonight
      

      jellybelly

      welcome to nowhere fast
      nothing here ever lasts
      nothing but memories
      of what never was
      we're nowhere, we're nowhere, we're nowhere to be
      nowehere, we're nowhere, we're nowhere to see
      living makes me sick
      so sick i wish i'd die
      down in the belly of the beast
      i can't lie
      you're nowhere, you're nowhere, you're nowhere to be
      nowhere, you're nowhere, you're nowhere to see
      there's nothing left to do
      there's nothing left to feel
      doesn't matter what you want, so
      to make yourself feel better
      you make it so you'll never
      give in to your forevers
      and live for always
      and forever, forever, you're forever to be
      forever, forever, you're forever to me
      

      zero

      my reflection, dirty mirror
      there's no connection to myself
      i'm your lover, i'm your zero
      i'm the face in your dreams of glass
      so save your prayers
      for when we're really gonna need 'em
      throw out your cares and fly
      wanna go for a ride?
      
      she's the one for me
      she's all i really need
      cause she's the one for me
      emptiness is loneliness, and lonliness is cleanliness
      and cleanliness is godliness, and god is empty just like me
      intoxicated with the madness, i'm in love with my sadness
      bullshit fakers, enchanted kingdoms
      the fashion victims chew their charcoal teeth
      i never let on, that i was on a sinking ship
      i never let on that i was down
      you blame yourself, for what you can't ignore
      you blame yourself for wanting more
      she's the one for me
      she's all i really need
      she's the one for me
      she's my one and only
      

      here is no why

      the useless drag of another day
      the endless drags of a death rock boy
      mascara sure and lipstick lost
      glitter burned by restless thoughts
         of being forgotten
      and in your sad machines
      you'll forever stay
      desperate and displeased-with whoever you are
      and you're a star
      somewhere-he pulls his hair down-over a frowning smile
      a hidden diamond you cannot find
      a secret star that cannot shine over to you
      may the king of gloom, be forever doomed
      and in your sad machines
      you'll forever stay
      burning up in speed
      lost inside the dreams, of teen machines
      the useless drags, the empty days
      the lonely towers of long mistakes
      to forgotten faces and faded loves
      sitting still was never enough
      and if you're giving in, then you're giving up
      cause in your sad machines
      you'll forever stay
      burning up in speed
      lost inside the dreams, of teen machines
      

      bullet with butterfly wings

      the world is a vampire, sent to drain
      secret destroyers, hold you up to the flames
      and what do i get, for my pain
      betrayed desires, and a piece of the game
      even though i know-i suppose i'll show
      all my cool and cold-like old job
      despite all my rage i am still just a rat in a cage
      then someone will say what is lost can never be saved
      despite all my rage i am still just a rat in a cage
      now i'm naked, nothing but an animal
      but can you fake it, for just one more show
      and what do you want, i want to change
      and what have you got
      when you feel the same
      even though i know-i suppose i'll show
      all my cool and cold-like old job
      despite all my rage i am still just a rat in a cage
      then someone will say what is lost can never be saved
      despite all my rage i am still just a rat in a cage
      tell me i'm the only one
      tell me there's no other one
      jesus was an only son
      tell me i'm the chosen one
      jesus was an only son for you
      despite all my rage i am still just a rat in a cage
      and i still believe that i cannot be saved
      

      to forgive

      ten times removed
      i forget about where it all began
      bastard son of a bastard son of
      a wild eyeed child of the sun
      and right as rain, i'm not the same but
      i feel the same, i feel nothing
      holding back the fool again
      holding ck the fool pretends
      i forget to forget nothing is important
      holding back the fool again
      i sensed my loss
      before i even learned to talk
      and i remember my birthdays
      empty party afternoons won't come back
      holding back the fool again
      holding back the fool pretends
      i forget to forget nothing is important
      holding back the fool again
      i forget to forget me
      i forget to forget you see
      nothing is important to me
      i knew my loss
      before i even learned to speak
      and all along, i knew it was wrong
      but i played along, with my birthday song
      holding back the fool again
      holding back the fool pretends
      i forget to forget nothing is important
      holding back the fool again
      

      fuck you (an ode to no one)

      i'm never coming back
      i'm never giving in
      i'll never be the shine in your spit
      i disconnect the act
      i disconnect the dots
      i disconnect the me in me
      and you're mistaken, it's you that's faking
      living and breathing and dying too
      this message is for anyone who dares to hear a fool
      you can't bring me back, you can't bring me back
      cause i give it all back to you
      thru sacred alleys, the living wrecks
      wreak their havoc upon this world
      the disenchanted, the romantics,
      the body and face and soul of you is gone down that deep black hole
      destroy the mind-destroy the body-but you cannot destroy the heart
      and you, you make me so i need to disconnect
      and you make it so real
      i don't need you love to disconnect
      to runaround kids in get-go cars
      with vaseline afterbirths and neon coughs
      galaxies full of nobodies
      giving us the farewell runarounds
      i took a virgin mary axe to his sweet baby jane, lost my innocence to a no good girl, scratch my
      face with anvil hands, and coil my tongue around a bumblebee mouth
      and i give it all back to you
      no way, i don't need it, i don't need your love to disconnect
      and you make it, so real, i don't need your love to disconnect
      no way to disconnect
      and you make it so real
      i don't need your love to disconnect
      no way to disconnect
      

      love

      to my mistakes, to my mistakes of cowardice
      she shimmy shakes, the jimmy jakes of consequence
      born of the airs and dues, my airs of madness do declare
      that it's ok, it's love
      it's what you wanted to see, it's who you wanted to be
      for what you needed to need, she'll make it up
      love, it's who you know
      machine gun blues, her vacant rush is so steel
      i'm unaware, lost inside your visions
      i got mine too over, i got mine and i got you
      cause i know you, you're love
      it's what you wanted to see, it's who you wanted to be
      for what you needed to need, she'll make it up
      love, it's who you know
      can i look up to you as you look down on me
      can i feel in to you as you felt in to me
      i can't help what you see, i can't help but to be
      for what you needed to need, she'll make it
      love, it's who you know
      

      cupid de locke

      cupid hath pulled back his sweetheart's bow
      to cast divine arrows into her soul
      to grab her attention swift and quick
      or morrow the marrow of her bones be thick
      with turpentine kisses and mistaken blows
      
      see the devil may do as the devil may care
      he loves none sweeter as sweeter the dare
      her mouth the mischief he doth seek
      her heart the captive of which he speaks
      so note all ye lovers in love with the sound
      your world be shattered with nary a note
      of one cupids arrow under your coat
      
      and in the land of star crossed lovers
      and barren hearted wanderers
      forever lost in forsaken missives and satan's pull
      we seek the unseekable and we speak the unspeakable
      our hopes dead gathering dust to dust
      in faith, in compassion, and in love
      

      galapogos

      ain't it funny how we pretend we're still a child
      softly stolen under our blanket skies
      and rescue me from me, and all that i believe
      i won't deny the pain
      i won't deny the change
      and shoul i fall from grace here with you
      will you leave me too?
      
      carve out your heart for keeps in an old oak tree
      and hold me for goodbyes-and-whispered lullabyes
      and tell me i am still
      the man i'm supposed to be
      i won't deny the pain
      i won't deny the change
      and should i fall from grace here with you
      will you leave me too?
      
      too late to turn to turn back now, i'm running out of sound
      and i am changing, changing
      and if we died right now, this fool you love somehow
      is here with you
      i won't deny the pain
      i won't deny the change
      and should i fall from grace here with you
      would you leave me too?
      

      muzzle

      i fear that i am ordinary, just like everyone
      to lie here and die among the sorrows
      adrift among the days
      for everything i ever said
      and everything i've ever done is gone and dead
      as all things must surely have to end
      and great loves will one day have to part
      i know that i am meant for this world
      my life has been ewxtraordinary
      blessed and cursed and won
      time heals but i'm forever broken
      by and by the way...
      have you ever heard the words
      i'm singing in these song?
      it's for the girl i've loved all along
      can a taste of love be so wrong
      as all things must serly have to end
      and great loves will one day have to part
      i know that i am meant for this world
      and in my mind as i was floating
      far above the clouds
      some children laughed i'd fall for certain
      for thinking that i'd last forever
      but i knew exactly where i was
      and i knew the meaning of it all
      and i knew the the distance to the sun
      and i knew the echo that is love
      and i knew the secrets in your spires
      and i knew the emptiness of youth
      and i knew the solitude of heart
      and i knew the murmurs of the soul
      and the world is drawn into your hands
      and the world is etched upon your heart
      and the world so hard to understand
      is world you can't live without
      and i knew the silence of the world
      

      porcelina of the vast oceans

      as far as you take me, that's where i believe
      the realm of soft delusions, floating on the laves
      on a distant shoreline, she waves her arms to me
      as all the thought police, and closing in for sleep
      the dilly dally, of my bright lit stay
      the steam of my misfortunes
      has given me the power to be afraid
      and in my mind i'm everyone
      and in my mind
      without a care in this whole world
      without a care in this life
      it's what you take that makes it right
      porcelina of the oceans blue
      in the slipstream, of thoughtless thoughts
      the light of all that's good, the light of all that's true
      to the fringes gladly, i walk unadorned
      with gods and their creations
      with filth and disease
      porcelina, she waits for me there
      with seashell hissing lullabyes
      and whispers fathomed deep inside my own
      hidden thoughts and alibis
      my secret thoughts come alive
      without a care in this whole world
      without a care in this life
      it's what you take that makes it right
      and in my mind i'm everyone
      in my mind i'm everyone of you
      you make it right
      it's all allright
      you make it right
      porcelina of the oceans blue
      

      take me down

      take me down, to the underground
      won't you take me down, to the underground
      why oh why, there is no light
      and if i can't sleep, can you hold my life
      and all i see is you
      take my hand, i lost where i began
      in my heart i know all of my faults
      will you help me understand
      and i believe in you
      you're the other half of me
      soothe and heal...
      when you sleep, when you dream,
      i'll be there if you need me, whenever i hear you sing...
      there is a sun, it'll come, the sun, i hear them call me down
      i held you once, a love that once, and life had just begun
      and you're all i see...
      and trumpets blew, and angels flew on the other side
      and you're all i see, and you're all i'll need
      there's a love that god puts in your heart
      

      Disc 2: twilight to starlight

      where boys fear to tread

      candy cane walks down
      to build a bonfie, to break my fall
      my baby, my sweet thing
      just maybe we could lose ourselves this time
      king of the horseflies, dark prince of death
      his tragic forces are heaven sent
      in sweet things, in a lovers breath
      in knowing this was meant to be the last
      a go-go-kids, a go-go-style
      a suck suck kiss, a suck suck smile
      as always, in youn gneed
      a velied promise to never die
      on dead highways, her black beauties roam
      for june angels, so far from home
      for a love lost, a faded picture
      to tread lightning, to ink the lavender skies
      so get on the bomb
      get back where you belong
      

      bodies

      cast the pearls aside, of a simple life of need
      come into my life forever
      the crumbled cities stand as known
      of the sights you have been shown
      of the hurt you call your own
      love is suicide
      
      the empty bodies stand at rest
      casualties of their own flesh
      afflicted by their dispossession
      but no bodies ever knew
      nobodys
      no bodies felt like you
      nobodys
      love is suicide
      
      now we drive the night, to the ironies of peace
      you can't help deny forever
      the tragedies reside in you
      the secret sights hide in you
      the lonely nights divide you in two
      all my blisters now revealed
      in the darkness of my dreams
      in the spaces in between us
      but no bodies ever knew
      nobodys
      no bodies felt like you
      nobodys
      love is suicide
      

      thirty-three

      speak to me in a language i can hear
        humour me before i have to go
      deep in thought i forgive everyone
      as the cluttered streets greet me once again
      i know i can't be late, supper's waiting on the table
      tomorrow's just an excuse away
      so I pull my collar up and face the cold, on my own
      the earth laughs beneath my heavy feet
      at the blasphemy in my old jangly walk
      steeple guide me to my heart and home
      the sun is out and up and down again
      i know i'll make it, love can last forever
      graceful swans of never topple to the earth
      and you can make it last, forever you
      you can make it last, forever you
      and for a moment i lose myself
      wrapped up in the pleasures of the world
      i've journeyed here and there and back again
      but in the same old haunts i still find my friends
      mysteries not ready to reveal
      sympathies i'm ready to return
      i'll make the effort, love can last forever
      graceful swans of never topple to the earth
      tomorrow's just an excuse
      and you can make it last, forever you
      you can make it last, forever you
      

      in the arms of sleep

      sleep will not come to this tired body now
      peace will not come to this lonely heart
      there are some things i'll live without
      but i want you to know that i need you right now
      i need you tonite
      i steal a kiss from her sleeping shadow moves
      cause i'll always miss her wherever she goes
      and i'll always need her more than she could ever need me
      i need someone to ease my mind
      but sometimes a someone is so hard to find
      and i'll do anything to keep her here tonite
      and i'll say anything to make her feel alright
      and i'll be anything to keep her here tonite
      cause i want you to stay, with me
      i need you tonite
      she comes to me like an angel out of time
      as i play the part of a saint on my knees
      there are some things i'll live without
      but i want you to know that i need you right now
      suffer my desire
      suffer my desire
      suffer my desire for you
      

      1979

      shakedown 1979, cool kids never have the time
      on a live wire right up off the street
      you and i should meet
      junebug skipping like a stone
      with the headlights pointed at the dawn
      we were sure we'd never see an end to it all
      and i don't even care to shake these zipper blues
      and we don't know
      just where our bones will rest
      to dust i guess
      forgotten and absorbed into the earth below
      double cross the vacant and the bored
      they're not sure just what we have in the store
      morphine city slippin dues down to see
      that we don't even care as restless as we are
      we feel the pull in the land of a thousand guilts
      and poured cement, lamented and assured
      to the lights and towns below
      faster than the speed of sound
      faster than we thought we'd go, beneath the sound of hope
      justine never knew the rules,
      hung down with the freaks and the ghouls
      no apologies ever need be made, i know you better than you fake it
      to see that we don't care to shake these zipper blues
      and we don't know just where our bones will rest
      to dust i guess
      forgotten and absorbed into the earth below
      the street heats the urgency of sound
      as you can see there's no one around
      

      tales of a scorched earth

      farewell goodnight last one out turn out the lights
      and let me be, let me die inside
      let me know the way from of this world of hate in you
      cause the dye is cast, and the bitch is back
      and we're all dead teah we're all dead
      inside the future of a shattered past
      i lie just to be real, and i'd die just to feel
      why do the same old things keep on happening?
      because beyond my hopes there are no feelings
      bless the martyrs and kiss the kids
      for knowing better, for knowing this
      cause you're all whores and i'm a fag
      and i've got no mother and i've got no dad
      to save me the wasted, save me from myself
      i lie just to be real, and i'd die just to feel
      why do the same old things keep on happening?
      because beyond my hopes there are no feelings
      everybody's lost just waiting to be found
      everyone's a thought just waiting to fade
      so fuck it all cause i don't care
      so what somehow somewhere we dared
      to try to dare to dare for a little more
      i lie just to be real, and i'd die just to feel
      why do the same old things keep on happening?
      because beyond my hopes there are no reasons
      

      thru the eyes of ruby

      wrap me up in always, and drag me in with maybes
      your innocence is treasure, your innocence is death
      your innocence is all i have
      breathing underwater, and living under glass
      and if you spin your love around
      the secrets of your dreams
      you may find your love is gone
      and is not quite what it seemed
      to appear to disappear
      beneath all your darkest fears
      i believe in never, i believe in all the way
      but belief is not to notice, believe is just some faith
      and faith can't help you to escape
      and with this ring i wed thee true
      and with this ring i wed thee now
      and with this ring i play so dead
      but no one's asking for the truth, so let me tell you
      if you spin your love around
      the secrets of your dreams
      you may find your love is gone
      and is not quite what it seemed
      to appear to disappear
      beneath all your darkest fears
      to the revelations of fresh faced youth
      no one will come to save you
      so speak your peace in the murmurs drawn
      but youth is wasted on the young
      your strength is my weakness, your weakness my hate
      my love for you just can't explain
      why we're forever frozen, forever beautiful,
      forever lost inside ourselves
      the night has come to hold us young
      

      stumbleine

      boredoms in the bathroom shaking out the loose teeth
      sally's in the stirrups claiming her destiny
      and nobody nowhere understands anything
      about me and all my dreams
      lost at sea
      jack it up judy set your heart alight
      mayfair mistress of the satellies
      misspent youth- faking up a rampage
      to hold off the real slaves
      paid off and staid
      and what you never knew
      can never get to you
      so fake it
      i'll be your stubmleine
      i'll be your super queen
      and make you
      jukebox fuckup hanging round the drugstore
      no matter what you say he'll be back for more
      mommy's in the manger with the little kids
      she's got her reasons, got my forgets
      of tears and idle threats
      misplaced
      and no matter what they do
      they can't get to you
      so fake it
      i'll be your stumbleine
      i'll be your super queen
      and make you me
      come around ruby i could never sleep alone
      

      x.y.u.

      she didn't wanna be, she didn't wanna know
      she couldn't run away cause she was crazy
      she gave it all away, she saw her baby break
      and in the air it hung that she was dull razors
      and i said, i wanna fill you up, i wanna break you, i wanna give you up
      from one another, another one should come to one another
      no one should come between us
      still i was lonely, and she was by my side, my one and only
      knows that she could never hide
      i couldn't feel her, and it was just a game,
      cause i was lonely and she was crazy
      rat-tat-tat, ka boom boom, now take that, and just a bit of this
      cause i'm a watcher, and i'm a doer of none
      come to save you, cause you're all mine
      i hurt where i can't feel, i feel where i can't hurt
      i know where i can't know, i bleed for me and mine
      ka-boom, a rat-tat-tat, and some good ole bliss
      cause i'm a sister, and i'm a motherfuck
      i am made of shamrocks, i am made of stern stuff
      i am never enough, i am the forgotten child
      and i said i wanna fill you up, i wanna break you, i wanna give you up
      from one another, no one should ever come
      in between us, between us and our love
      mary had a little lamb, her face was white as snow
      and everywhere that mary went i was sure to go
      now mary's got a problem, and mary's not a stupid girl
      mary's got some deep shit, and mary does not forget
      and this is how mary's garden grows, and this is how mary has her ghosts
      and into the eyes of the jackyl i say ka-boom
      now we begin descent, to where we've never been
      there is no going back, this wasn't meant to last
      this is a hell on earth, we are meant to server
      and she will never learn
      bye bye, baby goodbye
      

      we only come out at night

      we only come out at night, the days are much too bright
      we only come out at night
      and once again, you'll pretend to know me well, my friends
      and once again, i'll pretend to know the way
      thru the empty space
      thru the secret places of the heart
      we only come out at night, the days are much too bright
      we only come out at night
      i walk alone, i walk alone to find the way home
      i'm on my own, i'm on my own to see the ways
      that i can't help the days, you will make it home o.k
      i know you can, and you can
      we only come out at night, the days are much too bright
      we only come out at night
      and once again, you'll pretend to know that
      there's an end, that there's an end to this begin
      it will help you sleep at night
      it will make it seem that right is always right
      alright?
      we only come out at night
      

      beautiful

      beautiful, you're beautiful, as beautiful as the sun
      wonderful, you're wonderful, as wonderful as they come
      and i can't help but feel attached
      to the feelings i can't even match
      with my face pressed up to the glass, wanting you
      beautiful, you're beautiful, as beautiful as the sky
      wonderful, it's wonderful, to know that you're just like I
      and i'm sure you know me well, as i'm sure you don't
      but you just can't tell
      who'll you love and who you won't
      and i love you, as you love me
      so let the clouds roll by your face
      we'll let the world spin on to another place
      we'll climb the tallest tree above it all
      to look down on you and me and them
      and i'm sure you know me well, as i'm sure you don't
      but you just can't tell, who you'll love and who you won't
      don't let your life wrap up around you
      don't forget to call, whenever
      i'll be here just waiting for you
      i'll be under your stars forever
      neither here nor there just right beside you
      i'll be under the stairs forever
      neither here nor there just right beside you
      

      lily (my one and only)

      lily, my one and only
      i can hardly wait till i see her
      silly, i know i'm silly
      cause i'm hanging in this tree
      in the hopes that she will catch a glimpse of me
      and thru her window shade
      i watch her shadow move
      i wonder if she.......?
      lily, my one and only
      love is in my heart and in your eyes
      will she or won't she want him
      no one knows for sure
      but an officer is knocking at my door
      and thru her window shade
      i watch her shadow move
      i wonder if she could only see me?
      and when i'm with her i feel fine
      if i could kiss her i wouldn't mind the time it took to find
      my lily, my one and only
      i can hardly wait till i see her
      oh lily, i know you love me
      cause as they're draggin me away
      i swear i saw her raise her hand and wave (goodbye)
      

      by starlight

      by starlight i'll kiss you
      and promise to be your one and only
      i'll make you feel happy
      and leave you to be lost in mine
      and where will we go, what will we do?
      soon said i, will know
      dead eyes, are you just like me?
      cause her eyes were as vacant as the seas
      dead eyes, are you just like me?
      and all along, we knew we'd carry on
      just to belong
      by starlight i know you
      as lovely as a wish granted true
      my life has been empty, my life has been untrue
      and does she really know, who i really am?
      does she really know me at last
      dead eyes, are you just like me?
      

      farewell and goodnight

      goodnight, to every little hour that you sleep tite
      may it hold you through the winter of a long night
      and keep you from the loneliness of yourself
      heart strung is your heart frayed and empty
      cause it's hard luck, when no one understands your love
      it's unsung, and i say
      goodnight, my love, to every hour in every day
      goodnight, always, to all that's in your heart
      
      goodnight, may your dreams be so happy and your
      head lite with the wishes of a sandman and a night light
      be careful not to let the bedbugs sleep tight nestled in your covers
      the sun shines but i don't
      a silver rain will wash away
      and you can tell, it's just as well
      goodnight, my love, to every hour in every day
      goodnight, always to all that's pure that's in your heart
      

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