Here are all the many, many, maaaaaaaaaaaany other jokes that have been submitted, but don't quite fit in any other category:



Dear Santa:

You must be surprised that I'm writing you today, the 26th of December.

Well, I would very much like to clear up certain things that have occurred since the beginning of the month! (While filled with illusion I wrote you a letter) I asked for a bicycle, a new skateboard, a pair of roller blades, and a new video game for my nintendo 64. I destroyed my brain studying the whole year! Not only was I first in my class, but I had the best grades in the whole school. I'm not going to lie to you Santa, there was no one in my entire neighborhood that behaved better than me. With my parents, my brothers, my friends and with my neighbors, I would go on errands and even help the elderly cross the street. There was virtually nothing I wouldn't do for humanity!

WHAT BALLS YOU HAVE LEAVING ME A FUCKING YO-YO, A STUPID ASS WHISTLE, AND A PAIR OF SOCKS!! WHAT THE FUCK WERE YOU THINKING, YOU FAT SON OF A BITCH, THAT YOU'VE TAKEN ME FOR A SUCKER THE WHOLE FUCKING YEAR, TO COME OUT WITH SOME SHIT LIKE THIS UNDER THE DAMN TREE. AS IF YOU HADN'T FUCKED ME ENOUGH,YOU GAVE THAT LITTLE SHITHEAD ACROSS THE STREET SO MANY FUCKING TOYS, THAT HE CAN'T EVEN WALK INTO HIS DAMN HOUSE!

DON'T LET ME SEE YOU TRYING TO FIT YOUR BIG FAT ASS DOWN MY CHIMNEY NEXT YEAR! "I'LL FUCK YOU UP!" I'LL THROW ROCKS AT THOSE STUPID ASS REINDEERS OF YOURS, AND SCARE THEM THE FUCK AWAY, SO YOU'LL HAVE TO WALK YOUR BIG FAT ASS EVERYWHERE, JUST LIKE I HAVE TO DO SINCE YOU DIDN'T GET ME THAT FUCKING BIKE, YOU PUNK ASS BITCH!!

YOU KNOW WHAT SANTA, FUCK YOU!! NEXT YEAR YOU'LL FIND OUT HOW BAD I CAN REALLY FUCKING BE...YOU'VE BEEN STEPPING ON THIS MOTHERFUCKER FAR TOO LONG! SO WATCH YOUR BACK NEXT YEAR, YOU FAT BITCH!

Sincerely,
Johnny

submitted by Mallory




Little Johnny on the tracks,
heared the engine squeal.
Now the train is comming back,
Scraping Johnnyh off the wheel.
submitted by Rich




Little Johnnie, with a taste for gore
nailed the baby to the door.
Mother said with humor quaint
"Johnnie, don't, you'll spoil the paint."



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