"We're all beautiful in our own way - my way just happens to be shorter."
"When you do good deeds, get a receipt -- in case heaven is like the IRS."
"Hey I'm average height....Yeah for a woman"
"How we doin' sweetheart?"
"I'm a lover, not a fighter"
"Watch the hair"
Hey! I'm average height for a woman.
Tis better to be thought a fool, then to open your mouth and remove all doubt.
Inside every short man is a tall man doubled over in pain.
It IS as bad as you think and they ARE out to get you.
If you don't know what you're doing...do it neatly.
For people who like peace and quiet....a phoneless cord.
Don't look back, they might be gaining on you.
Time flies when you don't know what you're doing.
When in doubt...don't bother.
No sense in being pessimistic; it probably wouldn't work anyway.
It works better if you plug it in.
It's not hard to meet expenses. They're everywhere.
GAY ABANDON: Homosexual repellant perfume.
We are the people our parents warned us about.
Just because you're not paranoid doesn't mean they're not out to get you.
Learn from your parents mistakes....use birth control.
I always wanted to be somebody, but I should've been more specific.
Smile...it increases your value.
A friend is someone who knows how strange you are and still hangs out with you.
UNFKNBLVBLE
Back off! Your standing in my aura.
I just want revenge...is that so wrong?
He who hesitates is probably right.
The trouble with being punctual is that nobody's there to appreciate it.
You know you lead a sad life when the girls who get around never get around to you.
If you can't laugh at yourself, make fun of other people.
Being superstitious brings bad luck.
Some days your the statue...somedays the pigeon.
All good things in life are either immoral, fattening or overpriced
On the one hand I'm indecisive...on the other hand I'm not.
I'm a lover, not a fighter.
Watch the hair.
I almost had a psychic girlfriend. But she left me before we met.
The first rule of becoming wealthy is to not lose money, the second is to not forget the first
I used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not too sure.
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