Chapter 5
She was in the hospital right now, clearing up some kid's mess.
"Eew, gross, I'm glad you didn't convince me when you asked if I wanted to sign up, too," said a voice behind her. Rye turned around and saw Nicole standing at the door.
Shaking her head, she replied, "I kind of enjoy it, I guess. You see different kinds of things, meet different people..." and her voice faltered for a second.
Nicole knew about Brian. When she had come two days ago to pick her up, she had walked in with Nick. She introduced her and all, and Rye told Nicole later on why she couldn't tell her about Brian, and Nicole understood. "Yeah, like Brian Littrell, you mean?" she teased. "Anyway, I can't believe you didn't tell me he was here!" she added with a smile.
"Ok, Nicole, he's here, but he won't be anymore, and you know it. He's leaving today, and I guess this could be the last time I see him," said Ryan ann, showing no emotion. Then she said, "Well, I'm finished here, I can't be caught talking to anyone but nurses, or so Lauren always seems to put it..." she said as she rushed out of the room.
Rye ann kept thinking whether she should or should not go see Brian again. It was after all, his last day at the darned hospital, they were going touring, or so she heard. She didn't really feel like going to see him, actually, it would just make her feel awful. So she decided not to stop by.
*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~**~**
Nicole was walking around the hospital, looking around. Rye had just run off like that and she could tell she was upset because it was Brian's last day there. She thought it would be better if she just left her alone.
She was thinking of other things, of course. Like Nick... she had felt so embarassed that other day in her car, but then when he walked her up to the hospital, he was really cool and she felt really comfortable around him. She had to go before him, though, and she really hoped she'd find him here again. Maybe he wasn't on this floor, she thought, time to check the next one. Nicole headed for the elevator and waited for it to come. She was still off into space when the doors opened and out came Nick, just as she was about to go in, bumping into each other.
"Oh, sorry," she said, just as he said at the same time, "sorry, didn't see ya."
Then they both looked at each other and laughed. "Why is it lately we seem to meet in the most awkward ways?" said Nick, with a smile.
"I...I..." Nicole's voice faltered as she was about to say something. Why was she so nervous, she thought? She had been practicing how she'd act around him for ages now, why was it that at the mere sight of him, she would feel like melting...
"It's ok," Nick laughed. "Don't worry, I wasn't blaming you or anything," he teased. "Although, who knows, you might have a history of stalking people."
"How did you know?" said Nicole, relaxing a bit more. "I thought I burned up all my files. Darn, now I can't make you a victim as you already know."
Nick shook his head laughing and said, "Are you here to make fun of your friend's work again?"
"Naah, got tired, I guess. And Brian's leaving today, no? That's why you're here?"
"Yup," he grinned.
"No wonder you're so happy, I thought it was a little weird that you were actually smiling," she teased.
"Oh, I smile," he said, pretending to be hurt. "Only when I feel like it though. Anyway, Brian's not leaving until sometime later on. I just came early, I guess. If you're bored like me, wanna go down for a drink or something at the hospital's caf?"
Nicole felt her heart leap. "Yeah, sure! You seem to know the hospital more so lead the way!" she said.
"Ryan Ann," said a somewhat cold voice.
Rye looked up from reading a story to Tammy, a 5 year old she adored. Lauren was at the door, looking really impatient.
"I don't know why I'm doing this but the patient at room 206 has been asking for you to come."
"Uh, that's ok, I don't really feel like going..."
"Do you think I came all the way here for nothing? Look, I have things to do so why don't you go see what he wants, and I'll finish whatever you were doing."
At times like these, Rye didn't know whether she should be grateful or mad at Lauren. In a way, she wanted to go see him, but in another way, she didn't.
"Ok, fine." She turned to Tammy and said, "I'll come back again, I promise, ok?" The little girl smiled and nodded, so Rye stood up and headed for the infamous room 206.
Without knocking at the door, Rye went in. Brian looked up and smiling, he said, "I was waiting all day! I thought you'd come, and give me that candy you had once promised," he sniffed.
Despite her mood, Rye couldn't help but smile. "You'll be able to get as much as you want when you go out 'to the real world', as you call it..."
"Aw, I'm going to miss my favorite nurse, though. Who's going to be there to take blood samples from me? Or trip over a chair and wake me up while I am sleeping," he teased her again, reminding her of that first time they had met.
"You should be glad you're ok, I'M glad you're ok, I was really worried... I mean, I tend to worry about others... it's my job, after all," she laughed, trying to hide that bitter edge to it.
Brian noticed it, though, and said, "Are you ok? I'm sorry I told Lauren to call you, I mean, if I got you in any sort of trouble with her or anything..."
"It's not that," said Rye, cutting him off. She smiled again and said, "Don't worry about me, I'm fine. Try and take care of yourself, ok? Good bye," she added, as she bent down to kiss his cheek, then turned to leave, seeing Brian slowly putting his fingers on his cheek. She rushed out of the room. She couldn't believe she'd just done that, but she didn't regret it. Of course, she wouldn't have minded kissing him on the lips, but she thought the cheeks were a safer way to say good bye to this person she wasn't going to see again...
Chapter 6
It had been a week since that day, and Rye felt like work was getting into a daily routine, seeing the same faces everyday, hearing the same whines... in a way, she was getting sick of it all. It was also boring without... Brian.... who had always been there with a smile.
It was obviously JUST her luck, to have the darned night shift once again. She was really getting annoyed at Lauren here, like what would they need her in the hospital for at 2 AM?? She obediently agreed, though, she couldn't say anything else, could she, but sit on that chair near the emergency room, keeping her eyes fixed at the door. She was hoping that by doing that she could somehow get them to open, and see doctors rushing in with an emergency of some sort. She was bored to death and feeling just angry at everything, and sitting down there doing nothing was certainly not helping her mood.
She felt one heavy eyelid closing, just as she heard the doors opening. She opened them quickly, knowing that it was an emergency. Doctors were rushing around her everywhere shouting orders, Rye felt lost as she looked around, hoping she could help in some way. She was very curious to get closer to the patient they were rolling quickly on that bed. They took him to another room, and Rye couldn't help but look from the window, although she knew she wasn't supposed to. She gasped as she saw that the doctors were trying to get the person to breathe again, wow, she thought, it must be really bad... the monitor near the bed was beeping all the time, until finally it regained to the almost normal lines, and Rye breathed a sigh of relief for this person she had never met in her life.
"But I have to see him now!" shouted an angry voice a little bit behind her. Rye, feeling a little curious, turned to see what it was all about. All she could see was the back of a blonde guy's head, who was facing a nurse.
"I'm sorry, sir, but as you saw for yourself, your friend was brought in a very critical condition, and it hardly looked like he'd survive. He is still unconscious, but at least he's breathing. When there is any other news, I'll let you know, but as of now, no visitors are allowed," stated the nurse firmly.
Rye Ann didn't need to hear the rest of the conversation, she wasn't curious anymore... she slowly put her hands over her mouth in shock as she stared at the person now lying peacefully on the bed, yet still alive. That person out with the nurse was Nick... and the person who almost died before her very eyes, was none other than Brian.
It was half an hour later, and the doctors had convinced Nick, after a lot of persuasion and assurance, that he should just go home. He didn't see Rye, though, she had sort of stayed listening to the side.
Rye didn't feel sleepy anymore, in fact, far from it at the moment. All she wanted was to go in and see Brian, and rule or no rule, she was determined to do so.
She didn't see anyone in the halls, so as quietly as she could, she walked up to the room that she had seen Brian being put in. She slowly turned the knob, careful not to make any sound, and pushed it open, then closed it softly behind her.
Rye took a few hesitant steps to where he was, and she almost burst into tears at what she saw. Brian was sleeping, hooked to all these machines with a mask to his face. This was not the same Brian she had grown so used to, and he looked so helpless, that she so desperately wanted to reach out for him, to help him in any way.
She slowly sat down on a chair next to him, and brought his hands to hers. She slowly kissed it, and felt tears slowly start streaming down her face. Then she pulled herself to a more comfortable position on the chair and with Brian's hand in hers, she cried herself to sleep.
Light was coming from somewhere, and Rye almost wished she could make it disappear. She slowly opened one tired eye, and could see the sun shining brightly through the windows, making the whole room seem bright and cheerful, although she knew there was one thing that was not cheerful about it, and that was Brian being unconscious.
She could not look at him, as she knew she'd start to cry again. She felt that hand she still held on hers give a little squeeze, though, and she almost jumped out of her chair. She turned to find Brian wide awake, grinning what seemed like a happy yet tired smile at the same time. With his other hand, he reached for the breathing mask on his face, and slowly pulled it off.
"Hi," he said, still looking at her.
Feeling self-concious all of a sudden, she wiped her eyes, as she knew the tears were still visible. "Hi," she replied, smiling shyly. "How long were you awake?" she asked.
He smiled again and said, "Something like an hour. I had a dream that I'd wake up with you right there, and you were..." She was going to cry, she thought again, she just knew it... "Anyway, I woke up and you were right there, sleeping peacefully, that I just didn't have the heart to wake you up..." Then he groaned as he said, "Get it, heart? No, actually, I didn't mean that as something funny... Are you going to say anything or are you going to just sit there staring at me?" he asked with that powerful grin of his.
Rye put her arms around a very surprised Brian, as she just couldn't resist that urge she'd had all the time after she'd seen him wake up. He didn't know how glad she was that he was concsious again, "I'm so glad you're ok..." she whispered in his ear, and she didn't see Brian's smile as he hugged her back.
Her arms were still around him when she heard the door open. She turned around, not wanting to let go of him, but still keeping her hands on his. She was afraid that if she let go of him, something would happen to him...
There was a doctor at the door looking very surprised, at both Brian and Rye. He saw her uniform of a volunteer and said, with a more understanding look, "Well, if you saw he was conscious, why didn't you let us know?"
Rye didn't know what to say, obviously the doctor thought she was sent here to check on Brian. Let him believe that, she thought with a sigh of relief, as she answered, "I-I was just about to go and call you," she said.
"Great, how is his heart rate right now?" the doctor asked, looking at a bunch of papers in his hand.
Rye had no idea what to say now, but thankfully, the doctor just said, "Look, stay with the patient for a few minutes till I get back, I forgot something," and without another word, he rushed out, dropping a paper.
Rye picked it up and turned to look at Brian, who was sitting there smiling. "Almost gotcha in trouble, now, didn't I? Sorry about that," he added softly. Then tightening his grip on her hand, he said, "What's wrong, you look like you've just seen a ghost or something."
Rye was beyond shocked. She hadn't meant to read that paper in her hands, but her eyes happened to skim through that one sentence, BRIAN LITTRELL- POSSIBLE HEART SURGERY, 61%-78% CHANCES- she stopped right there and let the paper fall, and it floated softly to the floor.
Brian could see her look of shock and asked calmly, "What did that paper say?"
Rye, who had just felt so happy to see he was ok minutes ago, felt so completely devastated. In her mind and in her heart, all she wanted was for him to be ok and now...this....
She quickly grabbed the paper that fell from her hands and said, trying to keep the shakiness from her voice, "It's nothing, some little paper the doctor forgot. I have to go back and give it to him." Then with a smile, she added, "I'll come back, and I hope to find you jumping and dancing by then! Don't make me worry again..."
Brian still knew she was hiding something from him, but he let it drop and said, "I like it that you worry about me, it really means a lot to me..." With his hand on hers still, he pulled her to him. She relaxed as she got closer and closer, knowing this was the moment she had been waiting forever for, and his lips kissed her softly, and she was just enjoying it when the door opened once again and they both jumped up. It was the doctor, who did not seem to notice anything. Rye felt annoyed, for she was liking it so much, yet it was the quickest kiss ever. Then she remembered the paper in her hand, and quietly handing it to the doctor, she whispered an 'I'll see you later' to Brian, who had a dazed expression on his face, and left, hoping, wishing with all her heart that he was not the Brian Littrell the paper was talking about, that it was just a little mistake, yet inside, she knew it was him.
Brian was watching the white curtains flap back and forth. The window was open, and his eyes were intent on that thing for some reason. Maybe because he wanted to get his mind focused on something, anything but what the doctor had just told him seconds earlier.
He felt the cool breeze from that open window come in, swirling around him. He made no attempt to move, he couldn't anyway. Besides, the coldness was kind of soothing at the moment, it helped freeze his state of mind into numbness.
He heard the door open, and he turned his head slowly and saw that Rye had come in. She went straight for the window to close it.
"My God, Brian. You're already sick and you don't care that you have a window wide open?" she said shaking her head. "The wind must have opened it, wow, it's a very chilly day, for this time of year."
Brian still didn't say a word, he was just staring at her. His eyes bore no feeling, it seemed, it was almost as if he was looking past her. Rye felt chills herself at seeing him look like this, and she slowly asked, "Brian? Is everything ok?"
His eyes blinked once, and he opened his mouth to speak, "I know."
"Huh?" now she was confused. What did he mean?
"I know," he repeated softly. "I know about what you did not want to tell me about in that piece of paper. I know now..."
"Oh..." she did not know what else to say. She felt so bad, she herself had just ignored that little piece of paper, not wanting to face it, to believe it. But now, hearing it come from Brian's own mouth, she felt like breaking down to cry. She wanted to hug him, to tell him that he was going to be ok, he had to be ok...
She took a couple of steps towards him but he held up his hand, shaking a little. "I want to be alone now, ok?" he said in a whisper. He looked away and then said, "Please... I just need to think a bit..."
Rye nodded through unshed tears. She hoped her eyes would not show the hurt she felt at the moment, but she could understand him, she reasoned with herself. He had to be left alone right now, and she could not be of any help to him if she stayed there. Quietly, she turned to leave that room, which she had always seemed to be cheerful because of him, but now looked dark and gloomy.
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