The whole way to the terminal I couldn't stop laughing at the whole metal detector incident. Mercedes was giving me evil looks but that just made me laugh harder.
All of the sudden out of the clear blue sky, Mercedes says she wants something to eat. "Your crazy girl, you really are." I said, still laughing. She looked around hungrily and finally decided to go into a magazine shop for a candy bar.
While she looked at the choices, I went a few shops down for a banana smoothie. The man working there looked at me strangely but he made me one anyway. I paid him and went back to find avery flustered and confused Mercedes. She looked almost hysterical, and when she saw me, I thought she was going to have a heart attack. She looked strangely pale, and very confused. When she started shaking, I got worried. All the sudden, she turned around and screamed, "I can't decide between the snickers and the payday!" Right after she said that, she broke down crying.
I went over to try to figure out what was wrong, but she bitch slapped me and told me to go away. By then, every person in the store was staring. I walked over to the cashier and paid her for both candybars, then I walked back to the hysterical Mercedes. I gently led her from all the people. She turned to me and said, "I'm sorry Michelle, I guess the PMS is really starting to kick in." I nodded and we slowly walked to our gate.
When we got there, I took our tickets and got us checked in. I threw away my smoothie cup on the way back to the waiting area where Mercedes was watching planes take off. I tapped her on the shoulder gently but she spun around angrily and shouted, "What the hell is your problem you motherfucking bitch!!??" I quickly turned and walked away, very surprised and hurt.
A few minutes later she came and sat next to me. She started to apologize but I cut her off saying that wasn't necessary. I knew she was deathly afraid of flying, and to be perfectly frank, I am too.
We sat in silence for a few minutes, until they started calling for boarding. We handed the lady our tickets and slowly made our way to the plane. We boarded, and found our seats, a few rows from the back. I sat next to the window, Mercedes sat next to me, and a very pregnant woman sat next to her. I could tell Mercedes was scared to talk to me, so I leaned over and said, "Sade, I am really not mad so don't worry."
"Okay, well I was just really out of line so I am sorry." I simply nodded and looked out the window into the dark night.
The flight attendant began the gay safety video and demonstration, and for some odd reason, we thought that was just hilarious, and were laughing the entire time making a big scene.
Five minutes later the plane had taken off and we were in the air. I pulled the latest issue of Playgirl out of my bag, and for 15 minutes me and Sade were practically drooling, when all of the sudden I jumped out of my seat and ran to the bathroom. I quickly shut the door and threw up.
After 5 minutes of throwing up, I finally felt decent enough to go back to my seat, but I was surprised to find the aisle completely blocked by stewardess. I worriedly looked around the plane for Mercedes, not finding her anywhere. I suddenly began to feel very weak.
When all of the sudden, I heard a scream come from the front of the plane. Stewardess were frantically running back and forth the plane, and I was forced to sit in a seat that was not mine. The screams continued and I had no clue what was going on. A few confusing minutes later, I heard a stewardess asking if there was a doctor on the plane.
I finally figured out the lady screaming was in labor and I instinctively ran to the front of the plane.I had taken classes at the hospital, and volunteered, so I was almost an expert at home delivery. The stewardess eyed me angrily, then I explained my experience, and with another furious cry from the pregnant woman, she agreed and I sat down next to the lady.
For the first few minutes I gave instructions to the stewardess, asking for different odds and ends to help with the delivery. After about 15 minutes the baby was finally ready to come out. When the first part of the baby started to show, I got really worried, because the baby was backwards. I knew this could kill the baby and the mother, so I told the stewardess to inform the captain and she left. A few minutes later when the baby was half way out, the captain came over the intercom and said we would be making an emergency landing in a littletown in Texas. I told the pregnant woman about her condition and she started to cry.
I suddenly felt very sick again and I ran to the bathroom and threw up. When I was done, I looked in the mirror only to find a horrifying reflection. I was covered in delivery material and throw-up, and I looked like shit twice ran over. I felt sick again and threw up. That was the last thing I remember before I passed out, hitting my head on the sink, knocking me unconscious.
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