Mary had a little sheep.
It went to bed with her to sleep.
The sheep turned out to be a ram,
And Mary had a little lamb!

Mary had a little lamb,
Her father shot it dead.
Now Mary takes the lamb to school
Between two hunks of bread.

Mary had a little lamb,
Its fleece was black as soot.
And everywhere that Mary went,
Its sooty foot it put.

Mary had a little lamb
And it was always gruntin'
She tied it to a five-bar gate
And kicked its little cunt in.

Mary had a little lamb,
She thought it was quite silly.
She threw it up into the air,
And caught it by its ...
Willy was a watch dog,
Lying on the grass.
Down came a bumble bee,
And bit him on the ...
Asssssk no questions,
Tell no lies,
I saw a policeman,
Doing up his ...
Flies are bad,
Mosquitos are worse,
And this is the end of my silly little verse.

Mary had a little lamb,
Its fleece was white as snow.
And every where that Mary went,
The lamb was sure to go.
Now Mary found the price of meat too high,
Which really didn't please her.
Tonight she is having the leg of lamb,
The rest is in the freezer.

Mary had a little lamb,
She tied it to a pylon.
10,000 volts went up it's ass
And turned it's wool to nylon.

Mary had a little watch,
She kept it in her garter.
And when the boys asked her the time,
She knew what they were after.

Mary had a little lamb;
You've heard this tale before;
But did you know she passed her plate;
And had a little more!

Mary had a little lamb,
Its fleece was black as charcoal
Every time it jumped the fence
You could see its little asshole.

Mary had a little lamb,
The doctors were astounded.
Everywhere that Mary went,
Gynecologists surrounded.

Mary had a little lamb,
The doctor was suprised.
When Old McDonald had a farm,
The poor guy nearly died.

Mary had a little lamb
A little roast, a little jam
An ice-cream soda topped with fizz
Boy, how sick our Mary is.

Mary had a li'l lamb
Its wool was soft and pink
A big bad wolf came by one day
Now Mary has a mink!