Disintegration


  1. Plainsong
  2. Pictures of You
  3. Closedown
  4. Lovesong
  5. Last Dance
  6. Lullaby
  7. Fascination Street
  8. Prayers for Rain
  9. the Same Deep Water as You
  10. Disintegration
  11. Homesick
  12. Untitled


    Plainsong


    "I think it's dark and it looks like rain"
    You said
    "And the wind is blowing like it's the end of the world"
    You said
    "And it's so cold
    It's like the cold if you were dead"
    And then you smiled
    For a second

    "I think I'm old and I'm feeling pain"
    You said
    "And it's all running out like it's the end of the world"
    You said
    "And it's so cold it's like the cold if you were dead"
    And then you smiled
    For a second

    Sometimes you make me feel
    Like I'm living at the edge of the world
    Like I'm living at the edge of the world
    "It's just the way I smile"
    You said




    Pictures of You


    I've been looking so long at these pictures of you
    That I almost believe that they're real
    I've been living so long with my pictures of you
    That I almost believe that the pictures are
    All I can feel

    Remembering
    You standing quiet in the rain
    As I ran to your heart to be near
    And we kissed as the sky fell in
    Holding you close
    How I always held close in your fear
    Remembering
    You running soft through the night
    You were bigger and brighter and wider than snow
    And screamed at the make-believe
    Screamed at the sky
    And you finally found all your courage
    To let it all go

    Remembering
    You fallen into my arms
    Crying for the death of your heart
    You were stone white
    So delicate
    Lost in the cold
    You were always so lost in the dark
    Remembering
    You how you used to be
    Slow drowned
    You were angels
    So much more than everything
    Hold for the last time then slip away quietly
    Open my eyes
    But I never see anything

    If only I'd thought of the right words
    I could have held on to your heart
    If only I'd thought of the right words
    I wouldn't be breaking apart
    All my pictures of you

    Looking so long at these pictures of you
    But I never hold on to your heart
    Looking so long for the words to be true
    But always just breaking apart
    My pictures of you

    There was nothing in the world
    That I ever wanted more
    Than to feel you deep in my heart
    There was nothing in the world
    That I ever wanted more
    Than to never feel the breaking apart
    All my pictures of you





    Closedown


    I'm running out of time
    I'm out of step and
    Closing down and
    Never sleep for wanting hours
    The empty hours of greed
    And uselessly
    Always the need
    To feel again the real belief
    Of something more than mockery
    If only I could
    Fill my heart with love




    Lovesong


    Whenever I'm alone with you
    You make me feel like I am home again
    Whenever I'm alone with you
    You make me feel like I am whole again

    Whenever I'm alone with you
    You make me feel like I am young again
    Whenever I'm alone with you
    You make me feel like I am fun again

    However far away
    I will always love you
    However long I stay
    I will always love you
    Whatever words I say
    I will always love you
    I will always love you

    Whenever I'm alone with you
    You make me feel like I am free again
    Whenever I'm alone with you
    You make me feel like I am clean again

    However far away
    I will always love you
    However long I stay
    I will always love you
    Whatever words I say
    I will always love you
    I will always love you




    Last Dance


    I'm so glad you came
    I'm so glad you remembered
    To see how we're ending
    Our last dance together
    Expectant
    Too puctual
    But prettier than ever
    I really believe that this time it's forever

    But older than me now
    More constant
    More real
    And the fur and the mouth and the innocence
    Turned to hair and contentment
    That hangs in abasement
    A woman now standing where once
    There was only a girl

    I'm so glad you came
    I'm so glad you remembered
    The walking through walls in the heart of December
    The blindness of happiness
    Of falling down laughing
    And I really believed that this time was forever

    But Christmas falls late now
    Flatter and colder
    And never as bright as when we used to fall
    All this in an instant
    Before I can kiss you
    A woman now standing where once
    There was only a girl

    I'm so glad you came
    I'm so glad you remembered
    To see how we're ending
    Our last dance together
    Reluctantly
    Cautiously
    But prettier than ever
    I really believe that this time it's forever

    But Christmas falls late now
    Flatter and colder
    And never as bright as when we used to fall
    And even if we drink
    I don't think we would kiss in the way that we did
    When the woman
    Was only a girl




    Lullaby


    On candystripe legs the spiderman comes
    Softly through the shadow of the evening sun
    Stealing past the windows of the blissfully dead
    Looking for the victim shivering in bed
    Searching out fear in the gathering gloom and
    Suddenly!
    A movement in the corner of the room!
    And there is nothing I can do
    When I realise with fright
    That the spiderman is having me for dinner tonight!

    Quietly he laughs and shaking his head
    Creeps closer now
    Closer to the foot of the bed
    And softer than shadow and quicker than flies
    His arms are all around me and his tongue in my eyes
    "Be still be calm be quiet now my precious boy
    Don't struggle like that or I will only love you more
    For it's much too late to get away or turn on the light
    The spiderman is having you for dinner tonight"

    And I feel like I'm being eaten
    By a thousand million shivering furry holes
    And I know that in the morning I will wake up
    In the shivering cold

    And the spiderman is always hungry...





    Fascination Street


    Oh it's opening time
    Down on Fascination Street
    So let's cut the conversation
    And get out for a bit
    Because I feel it all fading and paling
    And I'm begging
    To drag you down with me
    To kick the last nail in
    Yeah! I like you in that
    Like I like you to scream
    But if you open your mouth
    Then I can't be responsible
    For quite what goes in
    Or to care what comes out
    So just pull on your hair
    Just pull on your pout
    And let's move to the beat
    Like we know that it's over
    If you slip going under
    Slip over my shoulder
    So just pull on your face
    Just pull on your feet
    And let's hit opening time
    Down on Fascination Street

    So pull on your hair
    Pull on your pout
    Cut the conversation
    Just open your mouth
    Pull on your face
    Pull on your feet
    And let's hit opening time
    Down on Fascination Street




    Prayers for Rain


    You shatter me
    Your grip on me
    A hold on me
    So dull it kills
    You stifle me
    Infectious sense
    Of hopelessness and
    Prayers for rain
    I suffocate
    I breathe in dirt
    And nowhere shines
    But desolate
    And drab the hours all spent
    On killing time again
    All waiting for
    The rain

    You fracture me
    Your hands on me
    A touch so plain
    So stale it kills
    You strangle me
    Entangle me
    In hopelessness and
    Prayers for rain
    I deteriorate
    I live in dirt
    And nowhere glows
    But drearily and tired
    The hours all spent
    On killing time again
    All waiting for
    The rain




    The Same Deep Water as You


    Kiss me goodbye
    Pushing out before I sleep
    Can't you see I try
    Swimming the same deep water as you is hard
    "The shallow drowned lose less than we"
    You breathe
    The strangest twist upon your lips
    "And we shall be together... "

    "Kiss me goodbye
    Bow your head and join with me"
    And face pushed deep
    Reflections meet
    The strangest twist upon your lips
    And disappear
    The ripples clear
    And laughing
    Break against your feet
    And laughing
    Break the mirror sweet
    "So we shall be together... "

    "Kiss me goodbye"
    Pushing out before I sleep
    It's lower now and slower now
    The strangest twist upon your lips
    But I don't see
    And I don't feel
    But tightly hold up silently
    My hands before my fading eyes
    And in my eyes
    Your smile
    The very last thing before I go...

    I will kiss you I will kiss you
    I will kiss you forever on nights like this
    I will kiss you I will kiss you
    And we shall be together...




    Disintegration


    Oh I miss the kiss of treachery
    The shameless kiss of vanity
    The soft and the black and the velvety
    Up tight against the side of me
    And mouth and eyes and heart all bleed
    And run in thickening streams of greed
    As bit by bit it starts the need
    To just let go
    My party piece

    Oh I miss the kiss of treachery
    The aching kiss before I feed
    The stench of a love for a younger meat
    And the sound that it makes
    When it cuts in deep
    The holding up on bended knees
    The addiction of duplicities
    As bit by bit it starts the need
    To just let go
    My party piece

    But I never said I would stay to the end
    So I leave you with babies and hoping for frequency
    Screaming like this in the hope of the secrecy
    Screaming me over and over and over
    I leave you with photographs
    Pictures of trickery
    Stains on the carpet and
    Stains on the scenery
    Songs about happiness murmured in dreams
    When we both us knew
    How the ending would be...

    So it's all come back round to breaking apart again
    Breaking apart like I'm made up of glass again
    Making it up behind my back again
    Holding my breath for the fear of sleep again
    Holding it up behind my head again
    Cut in deep to the heart of the bone again
    Round and round and round
    And it's coming apart again
    Over and over and over

    Now that I know that I'm breaking to pieces
    I'll pull out my heart
    And I'll feed it to anyone
    Crying for sympathy
    Crocodiles cry for the love of the crowd
    And the three cheers from everyone
    Dropping through sky
    Through the glass of the roof
    Through the roof of your mouth
    Through the mouth of your eye
    Through the eye of the needle
    It's easier for me to get closer to heaven
    Than ever feel whole again

    I never said I would stay to the end
    I knew I would leave you with babies and everything
    Screaming like this in the hole of sincerity
    Screaming me over and over and over
    I leave you with photographs
    Pictures of trickery
    Stains on the carpet and
    Stains on the memory
    Songs about happiness murmured in dreams
    When we both of us knew
    How the end always is

    How the end always is...




    Homesick


    Hey hey!
    Just one more and I'll walk away
    All the everything you win
    Turns to nothing today
    And I forget how to move
    When my mouth is this dry
    And my eyes are bursting hearts
    In a blood-stained sky
    Oh it was sweet
    It was wild
    And oh how we...
    I trembled
    Stuck in honey
    Honey
    Cling to me...
    So just one more
    Just one more go
    Inspire in me the desire in me
    To never go home

    Oh just one more
    And I'll walk away
    All the everything you win
    Turns to nothing today
    So just one more
    Just one more go
    Inspire in me the desire in me
    To never go home





    Untitled


    Hopelessly drift
    In the eyes of the ghost again
    Down on my knees
    And my hands in the air again
    Pushing my face in the memory of you again
    But I never know if it's real
    Never know how I wanted to feel
    Never quite said what Iwanted to say to you
    Never quite managed the words to explain to you
    Never quite knew how to make them believable
    And now the time has gone
    Another time undone
    Hopelessly fighting the devil
    Futility
    Feeling the moster
    Climb deeper inside of me
    Feeling him gnawing my heart away
    Hungrily
    I'll never lose this pain
    Never dream of you again










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