Poems

Different Stars
Questions
The Parade
gossip
change
steps
bleeding heart
Life crashes
gloom
watchful
Awake
Fireflies
lost
Where is Reality
See
Heart Aches
Do You
A Mark
Dedicated
Floating
of Life
From Above
Almost Summer
Faced
The Other Side
A Day, A Moment
Crawling
Life Moments
Humbly
Mine

---

Different Stars

shining bright
choosing colors
for all to see
and you choosing which
you will open your eyes to
this is my life
in this time
short but precious
can i hide the darkest colors
of fear
and the deepest parts of me
because of fear
undaunting
yet mine
still light enough
to spill into darkness
and shine
though some brightness
stolen ~fs


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Questions

God's plan
or destiny
life in a time line
following sequence
or random plays
of choice
mildly interesting
possibly a mixture
like a brilliant design
never to be duplicated
unique and alive
each in our own way
existing
apart
or together
you decide ~fs


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The Parade

I watched a parade go by
ornately beautiful
Clowns in their detailed,
painted faces
waving and smiling
or frowning
Floats passed by
enormous and wonderful
I was entranced
watching intently,
waiting for more
to come my way
Bands in full, triumphant sound
that beat in my chest
Colorful costumes
all marching in a line
and patterned flags
waving in harmony
I smiled and laughed
feeling like i was a part
the colors
the sounds
the movements
But soon they all faded
and I was left
standing alone

exactly where I had stopped. ~fs


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gossip

is my life so colorful
that you can not
turn away
yours so dreadful and dull
you're compelled to live
in another
as long as it's not
your own

i can hear the words
in the distance
muttered by
distant mouths
unknowning
glimpsing a line
or phrase out of a book
trying to piece together
a puzzle
when they have no idea
the picture ~fs


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change

the winds of change
blow rapidly
north, south
east or west
today though
only a breeze
a hint of
what is to come
anticipation
of tomorrow ~fs


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steps

do you let others quietly,
dutifully pick up the mess
you leave behind
or do you stop long enough
to help
the future is yours
but you can't close your eyes
to the past
just to move on ~fs


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bleeding heart

the poisin i feel
in my veins
allows relaxation
and feelings to surface
when i try to surpress
the haunting visions
too much to bear

even if you can't see
my tears
doesn't mean they
are not shed lightly
or pouring
from my soul
bleeding
from a cut
so fresh and deep
i can't feel
or i would surely die

despite the fragmented pieces
it's my struggle
to fall off the edge
or fight
for a life
still alive
time beats in seconds
inside heart's minute
and life goes on ~fs


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Life crashes

will you spin with me
and hold me
the past built on blocks
upon which i stand
to reach the future
will you be there
to soar with me
or catch me
when i fall

it's my love for you
that wants to save you
from your own destructions
because these eyes
could not bear
to watch
what i could do to you

what i've done
or become
has made me isolated
from the rest of life
i struggle with
independence
and running to you
because you are already
so much a part of me
would you come and scoop me up
hold me without question
and love
because there is no other
life as precious ~fs


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gloom

the rain starts
the day is dark
the drops splatter
against the pane
it feels sad, empty

then it stops
the trees are still
one frame of time
and i feel as listless
as the scene outside ~fs


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watchful

the robin jerks and flits
as it surveys
the world around him
jumping across the pebbles
then taking flight
soaring above the ground
and the world
from which i see ~fs


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Awake

why does life
slip away from grasping fingers?
it becomes so
when we choose life
to live
and fight
to experience
all we can
or certainly
life slips away
un-noticed
from unyielding hands
and continues on
for others
as sleep conquers
only motions remain
a peaceful facade ~fs


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Fireflies

And fireflies play in the night
while children dance
in wide-eyed awe
the chase of innocence
of love
of curiousity
of spirit unbounded
I glimpse this from the shadows
this gift of surreal wonder
which I take and place in my heart
before time counts on ~fs


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lost

a child without dreams
like a star in a box
confined in the darkness
unable to free itself
trying to shine through corners
See me
my rays of light
but so much more
hidden and locked away
hearts hold the key
love and compassion
Give unselfishly
and stars are set free
and illumination
above all ~fs


Where is Reality

In words
In music
In dreams
From sleep
or waking moments
Is what you see Real
or what you uncover
Some better left unknown
pains like a dagger
struck deep within
pulsing out
to feed each cell

Find solice
in your own reality
bleed quietly
and go on
Life ~fs


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See

What do you believe
what you see
or hear

Truth from words
or words not spoken
in lines penned
or in between

Can you know
what is intended
What you believe
is your perception

You cannot know
what I feel
or what I mean
Without living
within my heart
or in my soul

For a time
when pain begins
and cycles
From tears
to tears of joy

You will know
my strength
and what I feel
Deeply
Because you lived
in me
and see through my eyes ~fs


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Heart Aches

Don’t turn cold
Nor the rain will
wash it into the sea
Nor the wind will
blow it into the sky
Nor fire will
burn it into ashes
And what you will
be left with
and what you will
Feel
will be nothing ~fs


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Do You

Do you draw conclusions
from a picture
or words spoken out of turn
With your eyes
or someone elses
at a distance
or near
Careful not to get dirty
or touch your own life
Do you ~fs


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A Mark

Everthing happened
so fast
And yet
at times
in slow motion
Your smile
Beautiful
A memory,
vivid and clear
to run through
my mind
at will
A song
A look
A car
The sky
A fire
Wine
Has a chapter
Gone
A page
A book
A dream
A future ~fs


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Dedicated

Momma,
Do you know
how much I love you
How I hope to be
all that you are
You’ve given up more
than you should have
had to
Shared yourself
with me
A treasure I carry
within my heart
Your smile
shines through into your eyes
like stars twinkling
so bright
I have to smile myself
I am
what I see
in your eyes
because of your image
of me
in your heart
All that I have become
your essence ~fs


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Floating

Flying through the sky
I don’t know
if I am going forward
If what I left
will only be a memory
for tomorrow
that never comes
Today that never ends
A yesterday that never stops
Time that is not
Thought that is real
Touch without feel
Surreal
Emotion
Less
or all
One
Center
No beginning or end
In my soul
Thought as time
If not shared,
wasted
Lost ~fs


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of Life

Is life mine
or all for my kids
To give to them
All that I have
All that I am
Wherever that is
I have to be
All that is me
Alive
True
Fire from ice
So cold it’s hot
Burning
Not fading
Touching
Breathing
In them
A piece
Forever ~fs


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From Above

Below

Squares
Rectangles
Shaded in white
Tufts
of clouds
floating below
and shadows
upon green and
brown patches
Among water blotches
Deep blue
Scattered
Scribbles
of trees
Houses dotted
reflecting light
Roads that
curve and point
straight and jagged
Obsequious view
From above ~fs


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Almost Summer

Roller blades
Kites
Familiar slides
Jungle gyms
Growing up
from the sands
Red cheeks
Smiles and laughter
Sunshine amidst a blue sky
Water rippling
A backdrop
to an almost summer
Trees bare
waving in the wind
Birds gather along the shore
The seagull song
Lull the lapping water
Dripping sun
As shadows grow long
against the ground
As night overcomes day ~fs


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Faced

The sun is in my eyes
Those aren’t tears
you think you see
It’s not my heart
within my hand
crushed and bleeding
It was just a memory
that passed through my mind
My body isn’t shaking
it’s the wind whipping me about
I could speak
but the words don’t make sense
I’ll try to listen
but I can’t hear a thing
Feeling too much
No, those aren’t tears
The sun is in my eyes ~fs


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The Other Side

Life isn’t better
in someone else’s yard
It’s an illusion
Sometimes enticing
Obsessing to get there
Your life fades
and changes
If you get there
you will see
It’s not the same image
because it wasn’t yours
All you had is gone
and you’re lost
In the illusion ~fs


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A Day, A Moment

It’s a beautiful day

she said
Her words faint and distant
I nodded
as I sat down
The bright sun
The blue sky
I hardly felt
the warmth on my face
A summer day
by all means
Barely visible
in my eyes
No leaves
adorned a single tree
Remembering
I sat
Trying to absorb
my surroundings
No feeling or emotion
and the more I tried
the more I felt
Nothing
As I sat
Motionless ~fs


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Crawling

Struggling for happiness

A perception
so different
for every reality
and meanwhile
Life moments
passing by
Maybe a price
that can be paid now
or not
A future debt
Enjoy
Today ~fs


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Life Moment

Utter sadness
Despair and grief
Shame and guilt
And tears
Stream down
My blank face
Ugly disgust an eternity

But don’t feel sorry for me
I don’t feel sorry for myself
Share my pain
To lessen my burden
That’s all I ask
Of you
My friend ~fs


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Humbly

I stand before you
dropping to my knees
Pale and broken
God forgive me
for all my sins
misgivings and injustices
I cannot take back
harsh words
said in a flash
of rage from pain
or simple hurt
Seeing without believing
Doing without thinking
I cannot relive
moments, nights or days
or I would never go forward
if I could always go back
Change is for the future
not the past
I wish to cleanse
body, mind and soul
To melt the ice around my body
To tame the fire behind my eyes
To quench the desires of my mind
Humbly
I forgive
Me ~fs


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Mine

I’m grateful for the
things I have
and experiences
good and bad
I’m not afraid
to die But somewhere
along the way
I lost the ability
to live
By fear or uncertainty
it happened so subtly
I was not even aware
though I wish to get
it back
And be
And do
What I am
And what I see
in my bountiless
dreams


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