LITTLE SLIM (Taken from FunnyBone) Written by Bill Jones
"Late again," the third-grade teacher said to Little Slim. (When anyone was late for school, It usually was him.)
"It ain't my fault, Miss Addy, You can blame this on my Pa. The reason I'm three hours late? Pa sleeps nights in the raw!"
Now Miss Addy had taught grammar school For thirty-some-odd years. So she asked Slim what he meant by that, Despite her mounting fears.
Full of grin and mischief, In the flower of his youth, Slim and Trouble were ol'pards- But he always told the truth.
"You see, Miss Addy, at the ranch, This here lowdown coyote, The last few nights done et six hens And killed Ma's best milk goat."
"And last night when Pa heard a noise, Out in the chicken pen, He grabbed his gun and said to Ma, "That coyote's back again!"
"Stay back, he yelled to all us kids, I wouldn't want ya hurt!"
He was naked as a jaybird- No boots, no pants, no shirt!
To the henhouse on all fours he crawled, like an Injun on the snoop.
Then he stuck that double barrel Through the window of the coop. As he stared into the darkness, With coyotes on his mind, Our ol' hound Zeke had done woke up And come asneakin' up behind.
Then we all looked on plumb helpless As Pa was cold-nosed without warnin'. Miss Addy, we been cleanin' chickens Since three o'clock this mornin'!