Ambition

Chpt. 1

~*~At the Dorm Rooms~*~

19 yr Michelle, tiredly dragged her soar, aching body into her dorm room. She lazily threw her dance shoes in a corner. And went to her room. She went into the bathroom, and pulled out her bun, wich had hair, widly sticking all over in different directions and combed out her long silky dark brown hair.

She tiredly dragged her self ounce more out of the bathroom, and flopped her body on to her Comfortable, flowerd sheet bed. She sunk deep into the soft, silky white pillows and was drifting off to sleep. Madame Fallipo had pulled, and strained another hard work out, at the dance studio Michelle had been going to since she was atleast 4 or 3. She was about to fall asleep when she heard a door slam and giggling from ppl. She stuffed her face into her pillow and moaned.

"Hey Mich, you home?" Lacy, her dorm roomate called from the living room. Michelle didnt bother to respond. "Mich??" Lacy said a little louder. "WHAT??" Michelle said a little aggitated, her face still stuck in the pillows. " Geeze, little Miss Marry Sunshine aren't we?" Lacy said coming into her room.

"I have the most EXCITING newz" Lacy gushed w/ excitment. " We got a microwave that actually works." Michelle said sarcastcly, turning around and propping herself up on her elbows. Lacy gave her a look and said "No, there holding additons looking for girls from 18-23 to become a Backstreet Dancer!!!!" Lacy looked at Michelles face for any reaction.

" A WHAT dancer?" Michelle said moving one eyebrow up quizziclly. Lacy's face fell, Michelle laughed. Lacy smiled and said" A Backstreet Dancer, you know, A dancer for the Backstreet Boys!!" Lacy squealed Backstreet Boys part outloud.

"I'll think about." Michelle said getting off her bed, Michelle was a backstreet boys fan, but not an obsessed one like Lacy. Michelle was at first afriad to even go into Lacys room w/ out being confronted w/ pictures of Nick.

" Lacy, fianlly I thought...." Charisma trailed off. Charisma Stefan, was one of Lacys friends. Her and Michelle didn't quite get along. "Oh, hi Chrisma" Michelle said not even bothering to look at her. "Uh ya, whatever!" Charisma said flippng through a Teen People Magazine. Michelle shook her head. Maybe I will consider the Dance thing Michelle thought to herself.

It could just be my big break........
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Chpt. 2

~*~2weekslater~*~

Michelle had just been wokin up from the sound of her anoying alarm clock. "damit, it's already 9:00!!" She cursed outloud. "Crap im late!!!" She rushed around her room dressing in her dance outfit, and trying to brush her teeth. She then hopped around on one foot trying to get her dance shoes on looking for her brush. She almost littrelly tripped over her kitten, Oreo. "Oreo, baby you gotta watch out, mommy almost littrelly smushed you." She said picking up the small black kittien, cuddling it. She placed the kitten on the bed and quickly checked the clock, it was 9:15, she and Lacy were going to the Dance Studio to try out as the dancers, with a lot of coaxing, and pleading she finally agreed to tryout with Lacy. But unfortunetly, to her dislike, Chrisma was trying out with them to.

Finally they managed to get out of the house, the tryouts where at 9:29. It now was 9:20. They hopped into Lacy's red Mustang Convertible. Luckily the dance studio was only 4 min drive from the dorm rooms. They had trouble looking for a spot to park, but finally managed to find one in the back of lot.

They raced into the studio, They seemed to have made just about made it when they relized that they had no idea in the world were the additions were being held. They looked around a bit, the dance studio was closed for the day considering the acception of the additions, that were being held for that one day only. They rounded a corner and saw a girl with light reddish blond hair.

"umm, excuse me, but can you tell us were the additions are being held?" Michelle asked the girl, lightly tapping her on the shoulder. The girl turned around and smiled. " Oh, yea i can, im just on my way there to!" She said happily. "Follow me." They walked awhile and the girl said" By the way, my names Jenny, whats yours?" She asked looking at them giving them another huge smile, while adjusting the strap to a backpack that was slightly slipping down her shoulder. "Im Michelle, this is Lacy." Michelle said gesturing towards Lacy."So you guys nervouse about the additions?" Jenny asked. Lacy spoke up" Well duhh, i think all of us are." Lacy rolled her eyes. Michelle knew Lacy didn't really like the bubbily, to cheerful kind of ppl. Jenny just smiled and raised her eyebrows in a ok-Whatever, way.

Finally they managed to find the room and when they opend the door, they where greeted by the noise of the stario system blasting Christina Augularia's "Genie In A Bottle", and the mixture of girls talking and laughing. Some girls were strecthing and rehearsing the dance they were showed the other day.

"LACY, finally you showed up" Michelle heard someone yell across the room. She darted her head towards the end of the room and saw to her dislike, Charisma bounding towards Lacy like a sick puppy who missed it's owner. "Like omg, Lacy i thought you'd like never get here!" Chrisma said throwing her arms around in every direction. "Stupid, blond Bimbo" Michelle thought.

Jenny lightly nudged Michelle in the ribs and said" You see that women over there" Jenny point out. Michelle gazed in the direction Jenny was pointing. Michelle saw a black woman wearing black baggy jeans and a white tank top. She had long, black hair that were all in small brains. "Thats Fatima Robinson, the Backstreet Boys Choreographer." Jenny said a matter of factly. "She's gonna be one of the 6 judges that will chosing the dancers." Michelle nodded her head.

Suddenly Michelle heard a loud clap of hands. She turned her attention to the front of the room. Fatima was up there and shouted for everyone to hear" Ok, thank you so much for coming out here today, we will be selecting 5 of you girls to become the next dancers for the Backstreet Boys, for there 1yr round the world tour, we would like you to please take all of your things and please wait out side and we will call you 3 ppl at a time." Everyone grabbed there belongings and headed out the door.

Ppl were called in and out, finally, Michelle, Jenny, AND Charisma were called in to addition. As Michelle made her silent prayer that she not mess up she felt a nudge. "You'll do fine!!" Jenny said smiling brightly. Michelle sighed and said " I hope so!" As they walked through the door, Charisma shoved Jenny and Michelle out of the way and gave her a snotty look.

Michelle looked at Jenny and at the door.."Here goes nothing......"
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Chpt. 3

~*~2 Days L8r~*~

"Brriinnngggg, bbbbrrriinngggg," Michelle's phone rang in her ear. "ugh" Michelle groaned stuffing her face into her pillow. She tiredly looked up her clock it read 7:10. "Hellow." Michelle said groggily into the phone.

"Hellow, is this Michelle Brooks?" A female voice rang in the phone. "yes who is this?" Michelle said sitting up sideways in her bed. "Well, this is Clarrisa Hearting, im calling on behalf of the Backstreet Boys staff and devolpment congratulating you on becoming there next dancer." Clarrissa said through the phone.

Michelle's heart thumped with happness, excitment, and pure joy. "Well need you to pack your things today and meet here tonight at 7:00 for the tour, ounce again congragulations and welcome aboard." With that Michelle hung up the phone. She sat there silent for a couple of minutes, then screamed.

~*~
It was 7:00 and Michelle was at the dance studio, and unfortunetly Lacy didnt make the team. Lacy had been pissed beyond belief. But the worst thing of the whole mess was that Charisma had made the team to.

Michelle was sitting in a chair in the dance room thumbing through a Seventeen Magazine. She was one of the only people there besides Charisma. Then she heard a door open. She saw someone who looked familar then she realized it was Jenny.

"Omg, we made it!!" Jenny squealed running up to Michelle they embraced in a hug. Charisma rolled her eyes and scuffed. "Nice to see ya to!" Jenny said sarcasticly smiling and squinting her eyes at Charisma. Michelle couldn't help but laugh.

Finally 2 more girls by the name of Dannielle Martins, and Sara Tubbs joined them. Fatima came out of a small office that was in the dance room.

"Ok,im gonna come around and you girls can give me your names." Fatima said writing something on a clipboard. She took her pencil and pointed towards Charisma. " You, whats your name?" Charisma dramaticly flipped her hair behind her shoulder and said "Charisma Stefan." Fatima looked at her then wrote on Charisma's name on her clipboard. Then she asked for everyone elses names" Dannielle Martins," "Sara Tubbs" "Jenny Parris" finally she then came over to Michelle. "And you, whats your name?" Fatime said smilng. "Michelle Brooks." Michelle said with a smile.

"Ok, now were gonna see who im gonna be partnering you guys up with when it comes to some of the routines. Nick, AJ, Brian, Howie, Kevin, get your slow asses out here now!!" ...............
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Chpt. 4

~The Backroom~

The boys were all awaiting for Fatima to call them out to meet there new dancers. AJ, on the other hand was moping because he missed his g/f Jessinia. He had a feeling something was up with her because he had talked to her last night and she seemed hastily about him calling her.

"Maybe she's cheating on me." AJ thought. "No, dont think like that, Jessinia loves you and she would never do that!!" He scorned himself thoughtfully. But no matter what AJ did to reasure himself, he had a pang feeling in his gut something was up.

Finally, they all heard Fatima call them " Nick, AJ, Brian, Howie, Kevin, get your slow butts out here now!!" AJ smiled at Fatimas loud barking orders. He slowly got up and followed behind Kevin and Howie who where trying to calm down a goofy Brian and Nick who kept shovin each other around.

Michelle stood there, unable to move. The Backstreet Boys, where right there! Standing infront of her. And dam did AJ look fine. She thought to herslef. Jenny was giggling quietly to hersefl and Michelle looked at her quickly "what?" Michelle whisperd. Jenny looked at her and pointed towards AJ.

"I saw the way you where lookin at him girl, dont deny it!" Jenny snickerd. Michelle shoved her making Jen fall on her butt onto the floor. Jenny looked up at Michelle and started to crack up laughing. Brian looked over at them and made his way over.  "Hey girlys and what may i ask is going on?" he asked, giving them his charming smile, that always made there pubercent teenage fans go crazy. Jenny blushed madly and quickly got up muttering. "Um, uh nu...nuthing." Jenny stuttred. "You know what im im just gonna go sit sit down." She said smiling and nodding her head. She quickly retreated to the corner of the dance studio. This definiatly was gonna be some heck of a summer for them.
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Chpt. 5

~*~3 mnths later~*~

Jenny whiped the tiny beads of sweat that poured down her cheeks and chin. She breathed out a breath from all the rehearsing they had been doing. Michelle had grown a unique bond of affection towards AJ, but for some strange reason, she didn't show it. Jenny was determind to get the 2 together. AJ on the other hand, had grown attracted to Michelle emmidiatly when he met her. Her drk brown, mysterious eyes captivated him. They captured his intrest. When he looked into them, it was as if she had a secret and he was the only one she would led in on, he had also been upset for quite awhile bc he had broken up with Jessinia, he had found out she was cheating on him with an old ex.

Jenny's thoughts where broken with the sound of laughter. She whipped her head around, to come across that oh so familiar smile. Brian, she thought with a smile spreading across her face. She had fallen for Brian extremely hard. Jenny turned back around and twisted her waist around spining and kicking her foot out to the routine Fatima had showed them earlier.

"Hey Jen!" Jen turned around to see Michelle waving to her. "Were all gonna take a break and get some lunch, you comin?" Jen looked at Michelle and down at her stomach, she pinched what little fat she had and said "Nah, no thnx im not that hungry."

Michelle looked at Jen and gave her a look and said" You really haven't been eating that much.." Jen quickly looked up and said"I just haven't been hungry lately, nothing to worry about!!" Michelle placed her hands on her hips and checked out Jen's features, she had lost alot of weight.

"Look,im gonna go rest for awhile see ya later." Jen said then gave Michelle a weak smile, grabbed her bag and wen't backt to the hotel. Ounce Jen got inside, she dropped her things at the end of her bed and walked into the bathroom, she opend up the cabnit.

"Damit, i must have forgotton to by some more ex-lax." (Authors note: ex-lax is stuff you take to lose weight)She slammed her fist on the counter. "Well might as well go buy some more." She grabbed her purse off her bed and walked out the door.
~*~5 min later~*~
Jen walked down the hall reading a magazine she had picked up while getting the ex-lax. She didn't see who she walked into. "Oof" She bumped into Brian. She dropped her bag on the floor, the box of pills spilling out. Brian bent down and picked up the box. He looked at it then narrowed his eyebrows looking up at Jen.
"Whats this for?" ......... 
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Chpt. 6

After dance practice on Friday, Michelle was still having trouble with one of the dance moces. She had been to distracted by staring at AJ to even pay attention or even listen to Fatima. The girls asked Michelle if she wanted to go with them to go get something to eat, she had thought about it before but she had to tell them no because she had to keep working on the dance move, to get it just perfect, She never gave wanted to just work with it. AJ overheard what she had said to the other girls and offerd to stay behind to help Michelle with the move. Michelle couldn't help the smile the playfully pranced on her lips when he asked her.
When the music began to play in the backround and AJ was showing Michelle how to do the dance move. Michelle was in heaven because just seeing AJ dance the way he did drove her wild, even though she wouldn't admit it to herself. Michelle started to do the dance and AJ then went to help her when she had to spin and kick. rather than kicking after she did the spin, she fell on her ass instead. Michelle tried to do the spin and after AJ caught her bc he knew she would probably fall down. Michelle and AJ just stared into eachothers eys ounce she fell into him. After staring at eachoter for a good 5 min, AJ lowerd his face to Michelles lockin his lips with hers, giving her the sweetest kiss. It was long and passionate, they both felt a spark that they couldn't both describe they felt. after the kiss was over they heard the slamming of doors in the front lobby, and a commotion of voices and they both seperated immediately. The 2 ppl where Jen and Brian. Jennifer kept pushing Brian away from her as he kept slowly trying to talk to her, walking besid her trying to talk. Michelle quickly grabbed her bag said goodbye to AJ, walked past Jen and Brian running out the doors.

Just as she was out the doors of the studio she felt someone grab her arm. She whipped around hopin it wasn't AJ, instead it was Jen. She breathed a sigh of relief. "What was that all about back there with you and AJ????" Jen asked letting go of Michelles arm and walkng out to the parking lot where they got a cab to take them back to the hotel. "We'll talk about it later." Michelle said sighing. She replayed the whole scene in her head. From the way AJ held her to the sweet honey taste from his kiss.

~*~later that nite~*~

Jen and Michelle shared a hotel room and decided to order a pizza and have a "girl talk". "Ok so now tell me, what happend with you and AJ today?" Jen asked, self-consously picking of the pepperoni, and skin cheese of the pizza. Michelle looked at her for a min, watching what she was doing with her pizza. Michelle shook her head and thought "thats just the way she eats her pizza." Michelle sighed and said finally, "Well, I decided to stay after and work on the dance routine we had learnd and AJ offerd to help, so i did the twist rotation part and well, unflatteringly fell on my ass...' Michelle said gesturing with her hand, she stopped to Jen chokin on her pizza cracking up. "Hey!, you would have to!"She said throwing a pillow at Jen. "Sorry, go on." Jen said after she caught her breath. "ANYWAYZ, i tried it again, lost my balance and AJ caught me and well then it happend!" Jen started smiling like a moron. "Omg thats soo great!" Jen said clapping her hands. "Well it may be great to you but i cant be with him!!!" Michelle said falling back onto the bed. "I mean, after whats happend befo in the past with, Jason, Bret, Frankie, Rupert.." "Repurt??" Jen asked raising a drk brown eyebrow. "nevermind, it's just that, i dont know if i could handle another relationship, and besides, i would prob just ruin his career and mine!" Michelle said sighing pulling a pillow over her face. Michelle grabbed her pilllow of her face to find Jen not on the oppisite bed. She saw the bathroom light on.


Michelle felt a twitch in her stomach but pushed it aside.
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Chpt. 7

~*~The Next Day~*~

Every Michelle wen't it seemed as if AJ was there. She kept trying to avoid him but they alwayz seemed to run into each other. Michelle finally relieved that they could practice, which mente AJ wouldn't be around. But her relief ended when she saw AJ and the rest of the guys come in. She watched as AJ moved across the floor. Her eyes pranced around him, watching every signal movement his body made. "Michelle, can I please have your attention up her!" Michelle quickly turned around to see Fatima talking to her. "Sorry." Michelle said sheepishly. "Ok, is everyone here now, wait, where's Jenny?" Fatima said placing her hips on her waist looking around. Just as if by magic, Jenny burst into the room, looking flustered and tired. Michelle noticed something wrong with Jenny. Her eyes had dark circles around them, and her hair frail and thin. Her ounce bright playful eyes, where now replaced with a dull mucky color. She no longer had that smile that reassured everbodys problems away. Instead now it was a weak smile that came and disappeared. She sauntered over to the wall where the guys where and placed her bag next to Brian.

Brian looked up and her and his face took over a shocked, worried expression. "Great, he prob thinks im uglier than ever today." Jenny thought to herself. She looked at Brian and darted her eyes to over where Fatima, Sara, Danielle, Charisma, and Michelle where. Jenny swallowed the lump that had formed in her throat. She slowly, weakly dragged her feet over to where everybody else was. She had been up all night throwing up the pizza and ice cream her and Michelle had eaten. "Ok, girls we'll be weighing you today, to see how fit you are." Jennifer swallowed hard again. 'Just what i need, for everyone to know how fat I am, not that I don't already look fat.' She added to herself.

Michelle was weighed, than Sara, Charisma, Danielle. Finally it was Jennifer's turn. Jenny sighed and reluctantly stepped onto the scale. Fatima moved the knobs lower and lower on the scale. Fatima glanced at the thing than back at Jenny. "Can I please have a word with you."Fatima said looking Jenny in the eye worriedly. Jenny bit her lip and said." Can you just please tell me how much I weigh?" Fatima stayed quiet for a few seconds and than said" Jennifer, you weigh...you weigh 72 pnds."

Michelle gasped and put her hand over her mouth. Why hadn't she seen it!!! The pills Jennifer claimed where medication, the skipping meals, the late night bathroom runs. Now it made all clear sense. Jennifer was Bulimic.

Tears welled up in Jenny's eyes as she thought of how fat she was. Embarrassed she walked off the scale and not saying a word went to her spot on the dance floor. Fatima couldn't do anything so she turned on the music. In the middle of dancing to "Larger Than Life.' Jenny started feeling extremly dizzy, he legs started to collapse on her. She suddenly began to grow very tired. As soon as the music ended the girls walked over to the wall, letting the guys take there turn. As Jenny walked by Brian, he grabbed her elbow and said " Are you ok?" Jennifer was about to say something when she felt her knees locked on her and she fell to the ground, blacking out.

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Chpt. 8

Jennifer's frail body hit the ground, without question. To Michelle it was like slow motion, the body dropping in split second, as if it were frame by frame. "JEN!" Michelle screamed, running over to Jen's listless body, everybody crowded around her. Michelle started sobbing, "This can't be happening" She thought. "Wake up, WAKE UP"She screamed silently in thought. Brian quickly bent down and picked Jennifer's body up without much haste.

"SOMEBODY CALL THE FUNKING AMBULANCE NOW!" He yelled cradling Jennifer in his arms. Charisma stood there shocked, for ounce she didn't say anything. Sara and Danielle were shocked and didn't know wat to say. Fatima had already dashed into a nearby office and called the hospital. In a matter of minutes the sirens of the ambulance came pouring into the hearing of everyone.

The stretcher put her body into the ambulance. Michelle proceeded to climb into the back of the Ambulance with Jen. "Im sorry miss, but you can't ride back here." A tall women with Black hair said pushing her out of the way. "DON'T TELL ME WHAT THE ____ TO DO!" Michelle screamed, tears pouring out of her eyes. "I NEED TO BE WITH MY FRIEND, I WANT TO RIDE WITH HER, SHE NEEDS ME RIGHT NOW!!" The lady looked at her straight in the eye and said, "Look, as far as right now she can't even hear you and acknowledge your presence now if you excuse me we need to get her to the hospital!" with that the lady slammed the doors in her face, the Ambulance rushing down the rainy streets.

Michelle felt hopeless, "I need to get to the hospital!" She yelled turning around to everyone who was outhere. "I'll take you!" Brian said." I want to make sure she'll be ok!" Michelle hugged Brian. "Thank you!" She said, and as they climbed into Brian's bmw beamer, AJ came running up and said, "WAIT, I want to go to!" "Well, then get in Bone!!" Brian said hurriedly. He hopped into the back and they raced off to the hospital.

Michelle and the rest of the guys, the dancers, and Fatima where all waiting outside of Jennifer's hospital room. Brian hated being there, it brought back to many painful memories of when he was a child, having to be there at weeks at a time because of his heart. Michelle sat in the uncomftorable plastic chairs, feeling numb from head to toe. She was deep in thought thinking back to what made Jen ever do this. "God, I never thought she would do this, she was always so cheerful, she never made comments about herself." She thought back to when her and Jen and the rest of the girls excluding Charisma, took waterguns and squirted the guys who had been fast asleep in there bunks. Or the time her and Jen got in trouble for pulling down Nicks pants during rehearsal, even the time they dressed Brian up as a girl. She recounted all the good moments. "God i just hope she doesn't die..." with that thought she broke down sobbing, placing a hand to her forehead her hair falling into her face. She than felt a hand on her back. She looked up through her tears, the tears streamed down her cheeks, creating new ones each peaking moment. She saw the warm eyes, the warm eyes that succeeded to place a hold in her heart. It was AJ, he held the same pain in his eyes as hers. She reached out for him, he returned. They held onto each other afraid to let go.

Finally the doctor came out. Brian immediately stood up, "Is she going to be ok?" He asked hopefully, but pang clinging on to every word he spoke and released from his lips. The doctor sighed and said "Well, she's in stable condition, she's suffered from malnutrition, lack of liquids, and most of her system has been poisend with over dose of some unfamliar pills, She's lost alot of weight....We dont know if she'll make it, she's got an extremly weak heart, were gonna give her a 50/50 chance to survive."

Brian just nodded his head and slowly slid his back down against the wall and rubbed his face with his hands. Michelle let out an extremly big sob and fresh tears placed upon her face, clinging and kissing her numb cheeks. AJ wrapped his arms around her and soothed her, his best. "Can we see her?" Dannielle asked, her hazel eyes puffed up and red from crying. "Yes, you can, but one person at a time." The docter said.

Everyone took there turns seeing her. After Brian had come out, his face was withdrawn and pale, his beautiful blue eyes dull and lost. Michelle was the last person to see her. Michelle sighed a deep breath and stepped into Jennifer's room closing the door behind her. The room was an ordinary white room, it had the sickening smell of death and medication. She slowly stepped towards Jennifer's bed. Her heart monitor beeped like an intoned rhythm. She slowly pulled a chair up to her bed. She looked at Jennifer's face. Instead of having the same shining glow that always pranced on her face, was replaced with a white stoney pale face of death. Her hair tangeld and wild spread out amongst the pillows. Michelle placed a hand to her mouth, keeping a sob down from crying. She placed a hand on Jennifers hand, it was cold, but had a warmth to it.

"God, please, dont take her away from us, please!" Michelle whisperd closing her eyes. "She's still got to much to do with her life....." Michelle was cut off with the beeping of the heart moniter going flat....................