Chatting In Newmarket with Serial Joe
Chart Magazine - September 1999

Ah, summertime and the living is easy. It's a time for kids to be bonded with sprinklers instead of the usual homework. It's a time to sit backand watch TV for 12 hours straight each day. And in Serial Joe's case, it's a time to be touring two of the major festivals of the summer, EdgeFest and Woodstock. Well, that, and Ryan Dennis and Dan Stadnicki spending some quality time with me, chatting in a sweet, air-conditioned location.

It's no use telling Serial Joe to "go cut your hair and get a job, ya damn hippie!" because all they have to do is spike it up and they're ready to go. Besides, hippies don't wear white after Labour Day. So, if you're thinking about heading to Newmarket, Ontario, I recommend you do so for your late-summer vacation plans. In addition to the beautiful décor that Becker's has to offer, and the "Save It!" gas station where Tommy Boy was filmed, Newmarket has Serial Joe - its number one tourist attraction.

It's been quite a jump from playing miniature hometown venues to performing in front of thousands at EdgeFest and Woodstock this year. How does this major change in audience and rapid success feel? Do you feel a lot of pressure when going out there on stage?

Ryan: It's cool. I like it. We appreciate [the rapid success] a lot. We have lots of people to thank. When I'm around people who are related to the band, it's kind of like work, but it's a lot of fun. So I don't really take it that seriously, work-wise. I have a lot of fun with it.

Do you have any spare time to attend to any hobbies, or is playing in a band a full-time commitment?

Dan: I do what everyone else does. I hang out with friends. But I don't do any hang gliding or anything.

I heard that you're into biking. There were "devastating" reports that you were seen (gasp!) cycling the grounds of Molson Park in Barrie.

Ryan: I'll ride anywhere I see an opening in a forest. I like to do a lot of street riding, but I haven't been to Toronto, where there are some decent trails. There have been some pretty good trails that I've seen. For instance, down near the Don Valley Parkway, and there are all kinds of places near High Park which are nice to ride. And around Richmond Hill too, there's a lot of good stuff.

Is this something that you'd be interested in doing as a career, if ever you got tired of playing in a band?

Ryan: The only reason I'd get tired of being in a band is because, say if we're going for years and years and we just "burn out." It would never mean that I get tired of playing music, but maybe if it's a long time down the road, then maybe... I don't know. Everything seems to be appealing about biking, except flying off 10-foot drops. That's the thing I have to get past.

Both of you are in high school. Is school life different now that you're getting more recognition in the "public eye" as musicians rather than your typical students? Are you being favored or being picked on more? Do people come up to you and demand and autograph or do girls flock around you in the hall?

Dan: I've only had to sign one autograph, and that was last year - for a yearbook. I guess people would feel weird coming up and asking us for an autograph.

Ryan: I don't get anything, because I pretty much keep to myself [in terms of causing trouble]. I have a lot of friends at school that I hang out with, but I don't cause any problems, so nobody bugs me.

Have you learned anything from the music industry, armed with your two years' worth of experience?

Dan: If you're in a band, don't "can" other bands. That just gives you a bad reputation. It upsets a lot of people; no one likes that. You have to be open-minded and respect what the other artists are doing. It might mess up your connection with the record label. Maybe the label was interested in signing you, but after they found out that you made fun of a band already signed to the label, then they might not want to sign you after all.

Name one person you would like to meet, and please do tell, why?

Ryan: Stevie Ray Vaughn. If he were to get reincarnated, I'd say, "Damn, you're good."

Dan: I would like to meet, since there are a lot of great drummers out there, Carter Beauford, or Matt Cameron from Soundgarden. Our bassist, Jon [Davidson] would've liked to meet Flea [from Red Hot Chili Peppers] at Woodstock, but we didn't get a chance to meet them. Jon might have also wanted to meet Jaco Pastorius... I would've also liked to meet John Bonham, the drummer for Led Zeppelin, a long a time ago. And also, Jennifer Love Hewitt and Catherine Zeta Jones. We could just talk about the "weather."

Worst Case Scenario: You're touring. Unfortunately, your plane crashes in The Andes. It gets so bad that the "helper monkeys" aren't helping and there's no food... So you have no choice but to eat one of your fellow bandmates. Who do you choose?

Ryan: Jon. He's the biggest guy, so he has the most meat on him. If it got that bad, I'd become a vegan.

Dan: Jon is the most plump, but I'd eat fruits and vegetables.

Ryan: But you need your protein, Dan!

Describe an embarrassing story of yours, using the word "embarrassing" in it.

Ryan: One time, when I was younger, I was on my bike. I was trying to show off, when I did a really shitty wipeout, and flew flat on my face. It was really embarrassing.

What squeaks your bucket... Er, what are your pet peeves?

Dan: Egotistical people. I think since you're in a band, people have to measure up or be better than you are, and they have to be the center of attention. There are a lot of Anti-Serial Joe people who just sit around and type up on the computer how much they hate us. It bugs me, because they have to be so negative and they have to be that way.

Ryan: I hate my cat. In fact, I hate all cats, because they're annoying and unintelligent. I guess I had a bad experience with my cat, because he sucks.

Is it a crime to wear white after Labour Day, really?

Ryan: I never knew that, but if it is, who cares?

Finally, what's coming up next for Serial Joe?

Ryan: Hopefully, some new guitars (hint, hint) and a tour. Realistically, we're playing some gigs around Ontario and Quebec. We're looking forward to playing in Quebec, because we've been having really good responses over there. We're opening up for Moist and Live starting August 21.