ISIS' Thoughts

Welcome toHow Do We Teach Our Children Reverence?  How Do We Teach Ourselves?

Webster's definition of reverence: Honor & respect felt or shown.

My Definition: Showing love and respect to others, even when ego and pride may become bruised in the process.

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Debut Topic:

Reverence begins with honesty...how do we teach our children to be truthful?

3/5/00

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Teaching  our children how to avoid fear when they make mistakes.

Our first opportunity to do this is the first time they spill a drink or knock their toddler dish off of the table.  Rather than yell and tell them to "straighten up"...a more appropriate response may be, "uh-oh, guess we better get down here and clean this little mess up", as you place the cloth in the toddler's hand and show him how to clean up a spill.  By doing this, we show him that it is okay to make mistakes; and, better yet, how to resolve them.

An example of an opportunity with an older child may be when you send them outside to play while you ready for a shopping trip, instructing him not to get dirty (remember this one....I do).  Of course, most young children will wind up getting dirty, which could create anger (resulting from our impatience) as we realize we may not make all our errands or wind up running late for something.  I suggest that, rather than fuss and judge for him "not listening to us", we can realize that we should not have sent him out to play without expecting him to get dirty.  Then we can  show him how to wash his trousers and give him a second bath.  By reacting this way, he does not fear us; but realizes once again that we are there for him when he makes mistakes.

Finally, a third example dealing with a school age child shows up as he brings home his first not-so-impressive progress report, poor test grade or report card.  Rather than chastise him for poor performance offer your hand with upcoming homework or help in studying for his next test.  Let him know that poor grades do not represent stupidity or lack of intelligence...but that we need to work harder.  Thus, we have saved his self-esteem, let him know that we are here to help, and taught him how to resolve personal issues.

CONCLUSION:

By letting our children know  that we are here to teach them and not to punish them when they make mistakes as they blunder through childhood, perhaps we can show them the merit in following the path of truth.  In helping to build their self-esteem and keep it intact when they do things incorrectly, we can teach them how to fail.  In getting rid of the fear of failure and judgement they feel stronger in being truthful. Honesty is the first step in creating reverance the heart's of our children...for without it, there is no respect, the second step in building reverance.