I sat alone on my bed,
Dreaming of you,
Dear boy.
Dreaming all day of you,
Of your voice,
Your cold stare,
Your harsh touch.
WHy aren't you with me?
WHy arne't you beating me?
Did your interest turn?
My silver hallo now tarnished.
Time keeps going,
Steadies the pace of my thoughts...
Thoughts that I can't help but hide,
Behind this cold stare,
Exactly like yours.
Boy, where are you?
Wicked child,
You left all too early.
You see,
My charm has not yet begun.
My heart has not yet opened.
Hidden under blankets,
Flannel Sheets,
Ugly comfortors...
But do you care?
Everything so ugly,
Seems so lovely atop your pointed head.
Oh my love,
You stare off,
Away from me...
Beyond these damn confining picket fences,
Beyond this city.
What are you dreaming of?
Pretty things dying?
Broken records?
Shattered glass?
The way my heart feels?
Dear Devil,
Come rescue me,
Fly beyond this good...
Take me "home"
Show me ugly things,
And tell me I look like them.
Starve me,
Tell me I'm fat.
Dear one,
Don't deny me this.
For pain is all I can feel,
And all I dare to love.