But... I now work at Dunkin Donuts and it is so much better, because, since, I work the night shift and am alone the whole time, few customers visit, except the interesting ones, who drink only decaf and french vanilla mix. The only bad thing about that, is having to close. And closing is especially aggravating when, after you clean up the bagel cutters, and cream cheese knives, not to mention the floor and the Coffee Coolata machine, a flood of last-minute, sloppy customers arrive and order one of everything that requires creating a mess behind the counter. They, then, sit down and slop up the tables and floor with crumbs and use the wall as a napkin for their butter-clad fingers.
Before cleaning, though, being messy is the best way to pass the time. The little cream pumps thingies are especially fun because whenever pumped, the cream squirts in various directions, such as walls, floors, customers ears and on it's operater's eyebrow. Another one of the joys, is the mixer. Now, if you have ever worked in a place majoring in coffee sales, you may know of the fun associated with the Coolata machine(or any equivalent thereof). If you do, then you know what I mean when I state how absolutely thrilling it is. Especially when too much cream is placed in the tumbler and when the concoction is mixed, a tidal wave of overflowed drink consumes you.
On a negative note, jewelery is a "No No", but since my earings only leave their home when they fall out, they don't come out for work, simply because of the 76 minute hassle.. Other things would probably be lost in the ..excitement.. of the doughnut shop, therefore I feel it most beneficial to succumb to certain areas of the dress code. The uniform isn't all that exciting but it protects me from the fun. The hat is well beyond the limits of good taste. (A) It does not protect my hair from falling into the food, (B) it does not protect the food from falling into my hair. And since it looks absolutely horrid, as does most headwear, I feel that it should be revoked as a mandatory part of the uniform. But as I have discovered, my opinion carries little weight..
Another thing I love is the customer diversity. Although the one thing in common with them all is the inquiry of; my earings, my eyeliner or the black painted, sharpened fingernails upon my quiant digits..The other day, a customer came in and handed me a mini-comic book about the Bible and accepting Jesus and his salvation. It was pretty amusing, although I'm sure it wasn't supposed to be. Like everywhere I've worked, there are children tugging their mother's jacket and wondering outloud if "that is a boy or a girl". The parents obviously don't answer; perhaps because they don't know themselves, or they don't want to embarass me. Just once I would like to hear them answer the latter after a thorough stare..
Not all the customers are good though... There is one hideously disgusting man (whose name will be withheld because I don't know it), that always comes in and snorts, and makes obscene noises with his nose and the phelgm contained therein. He also is convinced that I should be giving him free food and coffee, but, as much as I like helping people out, I don't do those kind of favours for people..store policy.. especially when I can't stand to be within a five mile radius of their hawking. At least once, everytime he comes in, he explains to me how he can't eat nuts because he will end up in the hospital. While grabbing muffins though, I occasionally attempt to slip him a Cranberry/Orange Nut muffin.. but he seems to catch me every time...
Another one of the great things about the customers is the way that they constantly offer a full scale report on the current weather condition, even when you don't ask. Of course, every so often, there is nothing else to talk about with a stranger and I'll ask about the weather...but then again, there are those of them who come in and offer such descriptive phrases as the lovely one I recieved, not too long ago, "Man, it's colder than a well-digger's ass, out there.." And such arises a great opportunity to continue the conversation with the response.. "Oh, really?..I'm not accustommed to knowing how cold a well-digger's ass is.."
It's kinda funny when people come in and share such information as, it's snowing out there, or when they relay the ever popular "it's getting dark" observation..It kinda makes you wonder, do they not realize that one whole wall of the establishment is glass, or do they just think that a witness report is more reliable?..
Anyway, as much as I love Dunkin' Donuts, I'm afraid that one day I will have to get a real job or I will be fired after one of my superiors reads this WORTHLESS REFLECTION, and discovers my devious plots to assasinate customers..Whichever comes first(probably the latter)... In which case I would love to go into the field of Journalism, to satsify my need and love of writing, especially of my opinions..In addition, I would, ultimately, find no other joy than to start my own literary or generally cultured magazine someday...But, I'll let you know when that comes to pass..
Ask Malachite whereabouts his work is so you can visit him..
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