Two characters are sat across a table from me in the
corner of a pub somewhere in North London. A bloke, a woman. I'm
listening to their conversation.
'Prolapse is a medical term,' the bloke says. 'When in pregnancy you
get prolapse placentas, the placenta comes away at the wrong time and
causes complications.'
'Not really,' replies the woman. 'It's when your intestines fall out
of your bottom. In fact I had a kitten who had one, he had little
pink lumps sticking out of his... and it went back in again.'
Meet Prolapse. In fact, meet Prolapse the London contingent, Dave and
Linda, because it is something of a feat to get all of Prolapse in
the same place at the same time. Based in Leicester, Newcastle and
London, rehearsals have been known to be only a monthly affair.
As Dave explains 'You gotta get six people from different parts of
the country together. It's a bit of a crap hobby really.'
'If we'd practiced every week, by the time we get to play it live
we'd be sick to death of it and we wouldn't want to do it,' remarks
Linda.
This is a band who started out in Leicester playing live sets that
featured a single strobe light and a vocalist who wore a snorkel
parka.
'It was awful,' comments Dave. So much so that he joined on guitar,
followed closely by co-vocalist Linda to complement Mick.
Prolapse are a live spectacle. Mick started dismantling the stage
with a screwdriver at a recent gig. In the past they have brought
props on stage and beat the shit out of them. Gigs were not only
musical performance but theatre too. Eccentric theatre at that.
'Mick used to smash up tellies and throw things at the audience,'
Linda explains. 'Then the press started saying those Prolapse smash
up tellies. It's just that we don't like standing still on stage and
we have a lot of energy. The smashing has stopped (well, it's under
control).'
Watching Prolapse's Linda and Mick on stage, you will notice the way
they are so intensely within their own bizarre little worlds.
Unconscious of their surroundings until they are bumped into, back to
reality. Dazed and confused with a bubbly energy originating from
their own unique madness it would seem. Linda rubbing both eyes with
her hands clenched in fists while in verse, Mick taking screws out of
the stage. Not a typical vocalist's stance.
'Sometimes I totally, totally forget that Mick's there,' remarks
Linda. 'He'll do the same with me. He doesn't have his voice in the
monitors, so I can't hear what he's saying, so that makes it easier
to forget he's there. We'll bump into each other and maybe if the
mood's right we'll have a scrap of a hug or whatever. It's difficult
to explain cos it happens so subconsciously, it's not like Oh I know
I'll go over there and put Mick's jumper on.'
Linda is prone to reading the odd book over the fizziness of
Prolapse's performance. Mid-song, out comes a book. Most recently
High Fidelity by Nick Hornby.
'It changes, cos if I'm reading a book at the time it'll probably be
that,' says Linda. 'But I usually take a small selection of books.
One is a mini encyclopedia and another called Sex Manners for the
Single Girl and it's from the late sixties and is about what you
should or shouldn't do. Once, we were supporting Pulp at Essex
University and of course the audience was there for Pulp and I think
we were even more disjointed than we are now! This was about two
years ago and I got this big text book and was ripping stuff out of
it and throwing it at the audience and people were (eyes
bulge), put off by it. I think from then, my pile of books
shrunk.'
Prolapse are also prone to the impulsiveness of live experimentation
ie. avoiding the expected and not playing what the audience has come
to hear.
'When the band first started, every song was made up during the set,'
says Linda. 'Of course, the years go by and you record stuff, but we
try and stick to this thing about making things up. So we take
advantage of sessions.'
Prolapse made up last year's twin A side, Unroadkill, live on a radio
station in Portland, USA.
'It's different every time, the vocals are different. We make things
up at gigs,' enthuses Linda.
Do you take into account what the audience wants to hear? This make
up stuff on the spot approach may lead to inconsistencies - a
15-minute art wank experiment may not satisfy the majority of an
audience.
'I think there is a certain amount of pressure for us to be a band
now,' responds Dave. 'If it was an audience that had seen us a few
times, we'd make stuff up. But if it's playing to a new audience in a
new city, then we'd stick to stuff that's written,' Linda
comments.
Prolapse have had some truly mad live experiences. As Dave comments,
the emphasis is directed at the audience. 'The thing about a Prolapse
gig is to get a load of energy going. Once you get that you just want
to keep playing. I think it's also important for us to keep a level
of tension. If everything's buzzing, you just want to keep that
going. One night I always refer to is a gig in Paris that ended in
carnage, a huge mound of bodies on stage. We'd never been to Paris
before and we thought everybody would be sat around writing
philosophy.'
'They were diving on stage and lying on it and Dave jumped on,' says
Linda.
'Yeah, I was about halfway down the pile. I didn't think they would
carry on.'
'It's like, your music has made people do that... that's
what's good about it.'
'I've been to a lot of gigs where I've though, I love this band, but
it's boring and my legs are hurting,' explains Dave. 'That's one
thing I'd like people to remember us by, that you didn't feel like
you were standing there and your legs are hurting and you'd want to
sit down.'
So Prolapse have an ambition in that sense.
'I'm only motivated to be in a band by really negative things. I
really hate so much music that's around at the moment, that's what
makes we want to make music.'
'I can't write about anything positive,' adds Linda. 'I don't know
why.' (Dave chuckles.) 'I can't! I just feel too tedious on
stage singing about positive nice things. Anything that is negative,
about death, or about relationships ending, anything like that or
about people going mad. Anything along those lines.'
Dave talks of Joy Division, the Velvet Underground, Jesus and Mary
Chain, My Bloody Valentine, and the fact that Marion are definitely
not the new Joy Division.
So what about life for Prolapse beyond the cliquey indie underground?
'I'm not afraid of pissing off that sort of scene cos I don't
actually feel part of it,' swipes Dave. Prolapse want to head in the
opposite direction to everyone's expectation, away from both the
cliqueness of the underground and the potential of the mainstream.
Oddballs in the middle. '
'We've got to be interested in it, that's how we are,' says Dave.
'Maybe at one point we'll get swept up by the music biz and do all
these things we don't want to do. I don't think we're capable of that
actually. If we all get fed up we won't want to do it.'
So where does that leave you?
'We want to be accepted to an extent, but as an interesting entity,'
replies Dave. 'A creative event instead of being great musicians, as
to writing great pop songs. I'm not slagging off great pop songs,
it's quite hard work really.'
'Maybe we should write some pop songs and get some money,' responds
Linda.
'We have,' mentions Dave, 'we've written pop songs, but by
accident,'
Corking bubbly power pop, like the live fave they don't play very
often, TCR.
'We don't like our pop songs though,' says Linda.
So what of the scenario of Prolapse having a hit pop song on their
hands? They recently appeared on the Chart Show. 'The thought of
having an accidental hit,' says Linda, 'the pressure is on - not from
out point of view - but from lots of other people's point of view,
for us to write a song that was at least as big a hit as the previous
one. You lose a lot of respect if you have just one hit. If it's an
accident you've shot it really cos you're not writing hits. Maybe we
do under perform, cos we know we could be number one in the
charts.'
'The fluke hit single is a possibility, but the follow on is just not
possible.' Dave states.
'A flukey one hit wonder band, that's a horrible phrase,' snorts
Linda.
Prolapse have a spanking new album in their sights. In their hands
they have the extremes of both potential hit pop tunes up against
experimental workouts that will take their own little adventures.
Whatever way they go from here, that is left to fate.
'You can get really bogged down thinking about it all,' remarks
Linda, who would rather remain flippant. While Dave would rather
forget stardom and settle down to his PhD and bring up his two
kids.
Prolapse have experienced a long hard slog to this stage of
recognition. So perhaps I should mention their polar opposite, Kula
bloody Shaker. Perhaps now after the slog, Prolapse really wouldn't
mind a quick splash into that pond called fame.
'I have no respect for situations like that,' spits Linda at my
mention of that band. 'It really irritates me! We slogged our way
around the shitest clubs, when there has been no one there. We have
dragged ourselves up by our bootstraps.No one has given us money to
help us. We got where we are today - not very far - by playing hard,
going out and playing gigs and kipping on people's floors. The
thought that someone can come along from nowhere with a famous mum
and get a number one really irritates me so much. It realy does,'
'It's what the people want,' remarks Dave. 'What my gripe is, these
bands don't sound very good. They're not trying very hard. There are
lots of bands which do and who are never going to be very big. Most
of the bands we respect could only dream of being on Top of the
Pops.'
That's life. But Prolapse plod on up that path to fame. Perhaps those
pop songs they make mention of will carry them at greater pace. Or
perhaps they'll take their eccentric experimental jamboree into
history, to be discovered after they've split up. Who knows?
'That's what it probably is really. Prolapse is a crap hobby,'
remarks Dave.
'We've got to enjoy it to do it,' points our Linda. Crap hobbies
indeed, enjoyment is the key and Prolapse still do it.
Planet of Sound costs £2.00 from Duncan Illing,
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