Turnbuckle Talk

Thursday, May 20, 1999

Welcome to the first edition of Turnbuckle Talk, where all sorts of bits and bytes of information will be thrown at you fans regarding the ever-popular WCFC. We here at the offices of the "Squared Circle" feel that from time to time it is our obligation to inform the fans about what issues have been brought to my attention through letters sent directly to me or through e-mail, as well as the thoughts of superstars that have been relayed to me through personal conversation... so beware superstars... next time you discuss the WCFC, you may just be providing me with valuable information pertaining to my article.

Question: My friends and I have been talking. We feel you are biased towards "face" wrestlers. Do we have a reason to believe in our assumptions?
- Derrick, San Diego

Pump: I wouldn't say that is necessarily true, even though I happen to be friendly with some of the most popular superstars. I suggest you don't read into my columns so closely... I write about what is on my mind that particular week.

Question: Great column. What do you think of the current feud between Sklar and Justus?
- Tom, Pittsburgh

Pump: I have to say, I am not totally in favour of Justus winning the belt. Lately, he has had an excess of mic time and some insiders feel the format of his speeches are getting old. Sklar is in my opinion the greatest champion ever, and should hold onto the belt for a little while longer. As for Justus, I am pretty close to holding him in contempt of court.

Question: Where does your name originate from and what does the J. stand for?
- Alex, Ottawa

Pump: Some secrets aren't worth divulging just yet but I can tell you this: My last name is an offset of an elementary school joke between friends.

Question: Pump, get a life!!! Hey Stack is a "jobroney" how can you so strongly support him?
- Marcus, Portland

Pump: Would you like some cheese with your whine?

Question: What are your thoughts on the recent firing of "The Lion"?
- Peter, Vancouver

Pump: The firing took place, in my opinion, on the greatest edition of Madness ever!!! As for the decision to quit... I don't blame him. There is currently more politics in the WCFC than in Mike Harris' campaign office.

Question: Hey Pump, great column!! Armon Williams now has a dog. Do you think anyone else in the WCFC should acquire a mascot?
- David, Halifax

Pump: Well, its interesting that you ask. I have always thought that the Zoo Crew were a bunch of humourous monkeys!!! So hey, why not give them one. Perhaps, a chimp may be able to occupy Hunk of Dump's time. By the way, David, judging from your question, I can tell you don't have too much time on your hands.

Question: Pump, everyone wants to know, who is your favourite wrestler?
- Allan, Kansas City

Pump: I try not to play favourites, Allan, but I can tell you this... (and here is a hint) somewhere out there... my grade 6 buddy is deserving of a medal.

Question: Hi, Pump. You seem cute. Do you have a girlfriend?
- Jill, Toronto

Pump: Remind me to fire the guy who posts these questions.

Question: Do you attend WCFC events?
- Patrick, Houston

Pump: Very interesting question, Patrick. Most people wonder this as well. All I can say is that I am always somewhere in the building and finding me isn't very hard. I have a look that is hard to miss...

Question: Hi, Mr. Pump, I am a dedicated WCFC fan. What are your predictions regarding the Dan Crank/Big Mama feud?
- Rick, Montreal

Pump: I have a slight hunch that Dan Crank will need to see an eye doctor following Wrestlefest.

Question: Most of my friends feel a Thursday show would put the WCFC over the top, what do you think?
- Daniel, Milwaukee

Pump: What do I think? Last time I checked my clock, Ben and Elisha's day did not consist of 55 hours. (That is a subtle hint to anyone who wants them to do a Thursday show)

Thank you for all your letters, your feedback is appreciated. Any comments should be directed towards the owners. After all, they own this newspaper.

J. Pump


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