He pushed the door open, and plopped my suitcase down on the floor. I dropped my backpack down after it, and found my mouth trying to form words.
        "Th-th----th----" Paul looked up, surprised and obviously happy to see that I was talking.
        "What?"
        "Th---------thank you." I finished in an almost inaudible whisper.
        "You're welcome!" Said Paul, and, for the first time since I'd seen him, smiled a genuine smile. I folded my head down again to my chest and knelt down on the floor to open up my suitcase. All of a sudden there came a buzzing noise from downstairs.
          "Hold on a minute," said Paul to me, and ran downstairs to press the receiver button on the gate. "Who is it?"
          "Cynthia. Paul, dearest, open sesame please...." answered a female voice.
          "Coming right up, Cyn!" Laughed Paul, and allowed the gates to open. I heard them squeak until they were wide and clear, and through the window I saw a car roll up the driveway, and stop in front of the door. Cynthia stepped out of the driver's side. She was beautiful, definitely beautiful, I concluded, though she was much older than I. By about ten years, since she was the same age as John, and John was 26. Cynthia let herself in, and Paul went to meet her. I heard pieces of a muffled conversation-
          "Wouldn't talk- said thank you- mentally hurt?"
          Then I heard Cynthia and Paul ascending the staircase, and I jumped to my feet and moved farther back into the room. I pressed my back against the wall as they entered the room. Like he was displaying a magnifient piece of art, Paul gestured towards me.
           "Cyn, this is Allegra. Allegra, this is Cynthia Lennon." She moved to shake my head, but I found myself self-consciously shrinking away. Cynthia looked hurt. I stepped forward a bit, and let my hand reach out. She took it gladly and shook with me.
           "Pleased to meet you." She was so polite! Though I couldn't find words, I let my eyes open a bit more.
          "Well." Said Paul. "Well. Er...Cyn, I'll make you some tea, all right? 'Be downstairs." He scampered down the staircase, leaving me alone with Cynthia. She giggled but I couldn't even smile. I was hurting again, more physically than ever, and I sat down on the bed and looked up at her. I couldn't say another word, and she looked uncomfortable having to deal with the silence. But she smiled anyway.
         "Well....." she said, "I'll bet that Paul has already ruined my reputation. But either way, my name is Cynthia, you can call me Cyn...I love your name, Allegra. I always have. It reminds me of music." I didn't say anything. "So.............." Finally she stopped beating about the bush. "What happened?"
         I choked up and struggled to breathe. The room started spinning around, my stomach was throbbing in agony. I had to yell to hear myself over the pounding in my skull. Finally a word came out.
        "Hurt."
        "Hurt where?"
        "Hurt. Hurt everywhere."
        "Are you bleeding?" I nodded. "Where?" I pointed down at my stomach.
        "It was that, then. Wasn't it." It wasn't a question, and so I looked away. "Oh, I'm so sorry. I'm sorry." Finally. Finally, finally, finally I couldn't hold it in any longer. I started to cry. And once I started I couldn't stop. Great racking sobs shook my entire body, and made me hurt more. I folded up onto the bed and pounded the pillow with my fists.