Stereotypes The suburbs they are dreaming They're a twinkle in her eye She's been feeling frisky since her husband said goodbye She wears a low cut T-shirt Runs a little B&B She's most accomodating when she's in her lingerie Wife-swapping is your future You know that it would suit ya Yes They're stereotypes There must be more to life All your life you're dreaming And then you Stop dreaming From time to time you know you should be Going on another bender The suburbs they are sleeping But he's dressing up tonight She likes a man in uniform He likes to wear it tight They're on the lovers' sofa They're on the patio And when the fun is over Watch themselves on video The neighbours may be staring But they are just past caring Yes The stereotypes There must be more to life All your life you're dreaming And then you Stop dreaming Time to time you know You're going on another bender Yes There must be more to life Than stereotypes ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Country House (So the story begins) City dweller Successful fella Thought to himself: "Oops, I've got a lot of money Caught in a rat race Terminally I'm a professional cynic But my heart's not in it I'm paying the price of living life at the limit Caught up in the century's anxiety" Yes, it preys on him He's getting thin (Try the simple life) He lives in a house A very big house In the country Watching afternoon repeats And the food he eats In the country He takes all manner of pills And piles up analyst bills In the country Oh, it's like an animal farm That's the rural charm In the country He's got morning glory and life's a different story Everything's going Jackanory Touched with his own mortality He's reading Balzac, knocking back Prozac It's a helping hand that makes you feel wonderfully bland Oh, it's a century's remedy For the faint at heart A new start (Try the simple life) He lives in a house A very big house In the country He's got a fog in his chest So he needs a lot of rest In the country He doesn't drink, smoke, laugh Takes herbal baths In the country You should come to no harm On the animal farm In the country (Blow, blow me out, I am so sad, I don't know why) ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Best Days Bow Bells say goodbye to the last train Over the river they all go again Out into leafy nowhere Hope someone's waiting out there For them Cabbie has his mind on a fare to the sun He works nights but it's not much fun Picks up the London yo-yo's All on their own down Soho Take me home Other people wouldn't like to hear you If you said That these are the best days Of our lives Other people turn around and laugh at you If you said That these are the best days Of our lives Trellick Tower's been calling I know she'll leave me in the morning In hotel cells listening to dial tones Remote controls and cable moans In his drink he's talking Gets disconnected sleepwalking back home Other people wouldn't like to hear you If you said That these are the best days Of our lives Other people turn around and laugh at you If you said That these are the best days Of our lives Other people break into a cold sweat If you said That these are the best days Of their lives And other people turn around and laugh at you If you said That these are the best days Of our lives Of our lives ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Charmless Man I met him in a crowded room Where people go to drink away their gloom He sat me down and so began The story of a charmless man Educated the expensive way He knows his claret from his beaujolais I think he'd like to have been Ronnie Kray But then nature didn't make him that way He went.... He thinks his educated airs Those family shares Will protect him That we'll respect him He moves in circles of friends Who just pretend That they like him He does the same to them And when you put it all together There's the model of a charmless man He knows the swingers and their cavalry Says he can get in anywhere for free I began to go a little cross-eyed And from this charmless man I just had to hide He talks at speed He gets nose bleeds He doesn't see His days are tumbling Down upon him And yet he tries so hard to please He's just so keen For you to listen But no-one's listening And when you put it all together There's the model of a charmless man He thinks his educated airs Those family shares Will protect him That you'll respect him And yet he tries so hard to please He's just so keen For you to listen But no-one's listening And when you put it all together There's the model of a charmless man ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Fade Away They stumbled into their lives In a vague way became man and wife One got the other They deserved one another They settled in a brand new town With people from the same background They kept themselves busy Long hours left them dizzy Now when He's in She's out All you ever do is fade away All you ever do is fade away He's not making plans 'Cos now they understand All you ever do is fade away He noticed he had visible lines She worried about her behind Their birth had been the death of them It didn't really bother them Now when She's in He's out All you ever do is fade away All you ever do is fade away She's not making plans 'Cos now she understands All you ever do is fade away When he's in She's... All you ever do is fade away All you ever do is fade away They're not making plans 'Cos now they understand He must learn to forget 'Cos this is all you'll ever get All you ever do is fade away ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Top Man This is a public warning Be careful when you're out We're having freaky weather There's a lot of it about On the terraces it's swinging He's a monkey on the roof You've seen him on the telly So let me introduce (Your host tonight) T.O.P.M.A.N. He's naughty by nature T.O.P.M.A.N. On doubles and chaser T.O.P.M.A.N. He a little boy racer T.O.P.M.A.N. Shooting guns on the high street of love In a crowd it's hard to spot him But anonymity can cost It's never cheap or cheerful He's Hugo and he's Boss He's riding through the desert On a Camel Light On a magic carpet He'll fly away tonight (Open sesame) T.O.P.M.A.N. Sees her in double T.O.P.M.A.N. Pukes on the pavement T.O.P.M.A.N. He likes her all clean and shaven T.O.P.M.A.N. Shooting guns on the high street of love ------------------------------------------------------------------------ The Universal This is the next century Where the Universal's free You can find it anywhere Yes, the future's been sold Every night we're gone And to karaoke songs How we like to sing along 'Though the words are wrong It really, really, really could happen Yes, it really, really, really could happen When the days they seem to fall through you Well, just let them go No-one here is alone Satellite's in every home Yes, the Universal's here Here for everyone Every paper that you read Says tomorrow's your lucky day Well, here's your lucky day It really, really, really could happen Yes, it really, really, really could happen If the days they seem to fall through you Well, just let them go ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Mr. Robinson's Quango Oh, Mr Robinson And his quango Dirty dealer Expensive car Runs the buses and the Evening Star He got a hairpiece Ooh, he got herpes His private life is very discreet A nicer man, no, you're never gonna meet He's the self-confessed saviour of the dim right wing He got respiratory problems and a mason's ring Oh, Mr Robinson And his quango Drinks with generals and county wives The family business is doing alright They're doing tangos Down in the quangos He makes them tick Ooh, he makes them tock And if you don't fit He put you in the dock He just sits in his leather chair and twiddles his thumb Gets his secretary in and pinches her bum He ran into the toilets in the town hall He got his biro out and wrote on the wall "I'm wearing black French knickers under my suit I've got stocking and suspenders on I'm feeling rather loose" Ooh, I'm a naughty boy Ooh, I'm a naughty, naughty boy ------------------------------------------------------------------------ He Thought of Cars Moscow's still red The young man's dead Gone to heaven instead The evening news Says he was confused The motorways will all merge soon Lottery winner buys the moon They've come to save us The space invaders are here He thought of cars And where Where to drive them Who to drive them with There There was no-one No-one There's panic at London Heathrow Everybody wants to go Up into the blue But there's a ten year queue Columbia is in top gear It shouldn't snow this time of year America's shot She's gone and done the lot He thought of planes And where Where to fly to And who to fly there with And there There was no-one No-one ------------------------------------------------------------------------ It Could Be You Churchill Got his lucky number Tomorrow there's another Could be me Could be you No silver spoon Sticky teeth, they rot too soon You've got to have the best tunes Or that's it You've blown it All we want is to be happy In our homes like happy families Be the man on the beach with the world at his feet Yes, it could be you The likely lads Are picking up the uglies Yesterday they were just puppies Beery slurs Now life's a blur Telly addicts You should see them at it Getting in a panic Will we be there Trafalgar Square? All we want is to be happy In our homes like happy families Be the man on the beach with the world at his feet Yes, it could be you Could be me Could be you Should be me Should be you But don't worry If it's not your lucky number 'Cos tomorrow there's another Could be you Could be me ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Ernold Same Ernold Same awoke from the same dream In the same bed At the same time Looked in the same mirror Made the same frown And felt the same way as he did every day Then Ernold Same caught the same train At the same station Sat in the same seat With the same nasty stain Next to same old what's-his-name On his way to the same place With the same name To do the same thing Again and again and again Poor old Ernold Same Oh, Ernold Same His world stays the same Today will always be tomorrow Poor old Ernold Same He's getting that feeling once again Nothing will change tomorrow ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Globe Alone Who maddest one on the M1 Who hasn't stopped sucking his thumb Who very straight and never grins Who cares what car he's driving in He is because he saw it on a commercial break And if he doesn't get what he wants Then he get a headache 'Cos he needs it Wants it Almost Loves it He's here on his own On globe alone Here on his own Who joined health club to glisten Into hi-fi precision Who mobile phone gives him the bone Who very keen on Sharon Stone And then he says... Who eats at the new brasserie Who only ever gets merry Who wouldn't be seen at bedtime Without putting Calvin Klein's on ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Dan Abnormal Meanie leanie Come on down Come and entertain the town It's Friday night and we're all bored Time's been called There is no more Time's been called It's such a bore Dan Abnormal Not normal at all It's not his fault We made him this way He'll imitate you Try to ape you But it's not his fault Dan watches TV The meanie leanie stays up late Mopes around Gets in a state The killer in your arcade Shooting gangsters Ready-made 'Cos that is where The future's made Teleport me Dan went to his local burger bar "I want McNormal and chips Or I'll blow you to bits Give us it" It's the miseries at half-past three Watching video nasties He has dirty dreams when he's asleep Dan's just like you and me He's the meanie leanie Altogether now... Dan Abnormal Not normal at all Oh, it's not his fault We made him this way He'll imitate you Try to ape you But it's not his fault Dan Abnormal's Me ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Entertain Me The weekend is back But so is he Head to the floodlights See the fraternity They're waiting I hear them up in the north Down in the south All that is spewing Spewing out of his mouth Entertain me At his'n'hers dating Bored minds agree Requirements to be stated And replies awaited She wants a loose fit He wants Instant Whip Guesstimates her arrival Will she want it Really badly? Entertain me A car A house Both in a street The boredom of a sober week The weekend's here Hip-hip-hooray To make the blues Just go away Entertain me ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Yuko and Hiro This is my work place And these are the people I work with Yuko and Hiro We work together We work for the company That looks to the future We work hard to please them They will protect us I never see you We're never together I'll love you forever I drink in the evenings It helps with relaxing I can't sleep without drinking We drink together From Monday to Saturday I go to my workplace But on Sunday We're together Yuko and Hiro
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