Brian sat quietly by the side of the bed, his hands tightly clutching one of his older friends. He sighed. He could literally see the life being drawn out of him.

"Where is he?" The man in the bed asked, his voice hoarse from the coma he had just pulled out of. His green eyes started to search the room once more, trying to find the baby blue ones of the man he loved. But, just like a couple of minutes before, he didn't find them, locking instead with the royal blue eyes of his younger cousin.

"He's coming Kev. It's ok, he's on his way. He's gonna be here any minute now." Brian said softly, leaning over slightly, and brushing a lock of dark black hair from his cousin's forehead. "He's coming," he said reassuringly.

"There's nothing for you to worry about bro. He's gonna be here." Forcing his voice to hold a normal tone, Howie looked over to where his big brother was laying. There was nothing they could do and the feeling of hopelessness they were all experiencing seemed claustrophobic. What was there for him to say to their mutual father figure? That the man he was asking for, the one who should have been there for the past two days waiting for him to wake up hadn't even asked for him, let alone entered the room? The man whose name had been Kevin's first word when he had woken up hadn't even asked about his condition? To break his heart with the truth?

"He had to go over to change for a little while. He hadn't left your side for the past two days, we had to force him to go over to the hotel room to take a nap and a shower." AJ lied easily. He hated lying to Kevin, but there was nothing much left for them to do. They had to lie for 'his' sake. It was either lie or tell the truth -- a truth that was too harsh to ever be spoken.

Kevin smiled slightly, the corners of his mouth twitching up in half a smile. "Good. He needs his rest." He remembered very little of the car accident. But the memory that stuck in his head was Nick sitting in the passenger's side, his forehead dripping with blood from a very nasty cut made by one of the windshields. His piercing green eyes, that had somehow adopted a deeper shade, started closing. Sleep was starting to take over him and it was obvious to his three friends.

"Sleep Kevin. You need to rest too." The younger Kentucky cousin said as he tried to not to show his emotions through his voice.

Kevin nodded. "Wake me up when he arrives. Ok?" As he said the words, he let his eyes close completely and his breathing became even.

"Sure Kevin, sure." Brian answered to no one in particular, since Kevin had already fallen asleep. Turning to look at his friends, he jerked his head towards the door, motioning for them to join him outside the room.

After closing the door quietly, Brian let his facade slip. "Oh God!" He exclaimed as he held onto the wall for support, his knees suddenly too weak for his weight.

Both Howie and AJ moved to his side in a minute, holding him by both arms and helping him over to one of the hospital chairs in the dim hallway.

"It'll be alright Brian. It'll be alright." Said the oldest man within the three of them, even though they knew nothing would be alright, never again.

"Where is he anyway?! He should be here!" Brian yelled in despair, his voice shaking with emotion. "My cousin is that room." Pointing to the closed door behind of which Kevin laid asleep. "He should be here. He should be!" He was barely able to finish the words as he started sobbing into his hands, tears streaming down his face. They were not the first tears of the day, and certainly not the last ones.

AJ embraced his friend as he, too, shed the tears he had been holding back while he was in the room. Fate had played an incredible unfair game to them. They had tried to convince the young blond, but their words had fallen upon deaf ears as his mind had already been made up. He wasn't going to set foot in the hospital for something that held absolutely no meaning for him. If he could only know what it was doing to the person who loved him like no other. If he could only know, then maybe, just maybe, he'd understand just why they were eager for him to see Kevin.

"He doesn't know Brian. It's not his fault he doesn't remember anything." Howie said softly as he rubbed his friend's back, trying -- pointless as it was -- to calm him down.

"But he should at least come D, you know that. Even if it doesn't mean jack shit for him, he should understand just how much it actually means to us, and especially to Kevin. If he could only open his mind just enough to believe *us* that he did love Kevin, not even a week ago, that there was a time when his eyes would shine with sheer love just by seeing Kev, then he would be here. But he's enough of a jack ass not to accept there was a time he was in love with a man." The younger one of the three said through clenched teeth. He had never thought it'd be possible for him to feel such hatred and despite for one of his closest friends so much. But then again, he *wasn't* his friend. Not anymore. He wasn't their friend since he couldn't remember a damn thing of their shared past.

Brian kept his eyes closed as he wept on AJ's shirt. It wasn't fair. It wasn't fair for either of them, but it especially wasn't fair for his cousin. Kevin had done *nothing* wrong. If only the couple hadn't wanted to go for a ride on the town. If only they had been paying attention to the road instead of each other. If only Kevin hadn't been driving so late. If only he had been able to see through the dark night. If only the other driver hadn’t have been so wasted he hadn't realized the street lights were red and not green they wouldn't be in this dilemma. But also if Nick could just remember the past years of his life.

Footsteps could be heard from the end of hallway. Howie looked up from his two friends as he saw Kevin's doctor walking to them.

"Good night." Dr. Kersh said as he stood by the side of the three young men.

Brian pulled away from the embrace as he met the dark eyes of the young doctor and stood up from the chair. He had been nice with them, especially after he had found out about the unique situation they were in. He had kept them posted about Kevin's health through his coma and after he had woken up.

The rest of the guys stood up as well, waiting for news about their older friend.

"Doctor. How is he?" The younger Kentucky cousin asked the words that clouded everyone's mind at the moment.

The doctor sighed. "I'm sorry to say there's nothing much to be done. The consequences of the accident were too much for him. We tried our best in surgery, but the damage was just too great to do much. It was a miracle he got through it, and even more of a miracle he woke up from the coma he lapsed into after the procedure." Looking at the anguished faces of the young man's friends, their eyes red from the crying and the tears held back, he felt awful for his next words. "I'd suggest you to be with him for the next couple of hours. He should be with his family and friends. He doesn't have much."

"No, no, no, no..." Brian kept saying as a mantra as he slumped down on the chair he had occupied previously. He couldn't believe what he had just heard. The words seemed somewhat hollow and empty, the idea foreign to him. Trying, forcing himself to believe it was all a lie. Wanting to believe they were wrong. The people who had studied years to be able to save other people, were wrong in their diagnosis. Placing his face between his hands once again, he started weeping for his young cousin.

"Oh God." Howie muttered softly as the words registered in his mind. They had all known Kevin's condition was critical, that between him and Nick, he had gotten the worse from the accident, but neither of them knew it would be so bad. He couldn't die. Kevin couldn't die. He was the oldest, but also the strongest of them all. They had always joked around saying that Kevin would be the one to bury them all, not the other way around.

AJ stood there, his mouth parted slightly. He felt like the air had been knocked out of him. The words of the doctor kept running through his mind, somehow trying to wrap his mind around them. The sounds around him seemed to come from a cacophony, muffed by something. His vision was blurred with his tears as they made their silent journey through his cheeks, a couple of them falling onto the floor and his shoe. His big brother, the only father he had even known, was dying. Kevin was dying.

"I'm so sorry." Dr. Kersh said softly, not wanting to interfere with their thoughts.

The doctor nodded before leaving the three friends to their mourning. The last thing they deserved was some privacy while grieving for their friend.

"We have to call him." Brian said through his tears as he lifted his face from his hands. Looking at both his friends, his silent tears continuing to from his blue eyes, he continued. "He has to come. Kevin needs to see him. He'd die if Nick isn't here."

"He doesn't want to come Brian, we've tried--" But Howie's words were cut off by a very mad Kentucky cousin.

"I don't give a flying fuck!" The blue eyed man yelled in the empty hallway. Both his friends looked at each other in surprised. The occasions they had heard Brian swear were very rare, let alone hearing him use the *f* word. "He has to come! I don't care what we have to do to bring him here. Kevin's been asking for him for the past two days, he has to come. We can't keep telling him he went to the hotel, he *has* to see him."

"But--" Howie started again, but this time he was cut off by AJ.

"You're right. He *has* to come. Kevin needs to see him, at least before..." His voice shook with emotion as he couldn't finish that thought. "I'll call him." AJ stated softly as he walked over to the other side of the hallway.

"It's not gonna help Brian." The curly haired man said as he placed both of his hands on Brian's shoulders. "He doesn't remember Kevin. Hell, he doesn't even remember us! He hates us for telling him he was in love with Kevin. The little rat can't believe he could be in love with a guy." He sighed in frustration. "If he sees Kevin he's gonna tell him he doesn't remember him. Kevin would die if he finds out Nick doesn't remember him."

"Then we won't tell him." Brian said, suddenly tired of all this. He could hear AJ yelling at the phone - supposedly at Nick. 'Good', he thought sadly, 'understand, Nick, that you coming here is not for *your* benefit, but Kevin's. Try to understand that.' Taking a deep breath, Brian continued. "We'll tell Nick not to tell Kevin the truth. To pretend he still remembers him."

"To lie." Howie acknowledged.

The younger man nodded slowly. "We don't have any other option. It's not as if we could tell Kevin he doesn't wanna come either. We don't have another choice, Howie. I don't like this more than you do, but Kevin is hurting as it is. He deserves to see the man he loves before... before..." Brian couldn't finish as he cried out another torrent of tears. He bit his lower lip as he struggled to keep himself from trembling. Squeezing his eyes shut, he sat down by the chair once again and allowed himself to weep quietly into his hands.

Howie, looking at his younger friend, sat by his side and embraced him. Brian buried his head in Howie's shoulder, sobbing loudly and holding on to Howie for dear life. He, too, let himself cry as his tears streamed down his face.

A couple of minutes later, AJ returned to the hallway outside Kevin's room. He had yelled at his younger 'brother' like he never had before. Threatening to go over to his hotel room and kill him with his bare hands if he had to if that was gonna make him come over to see Kevin. He had never felt so frustrated as everytime he heard the sad words 'I don't care' leave the blonde's lips and made its way to AJ's ears. How could someone who used to love Kevin as much as Nick did, now be as heartless as he was? Maybe because he had forgotten every reason to love him. Because he had forgotten all the times Kevin had been there for him to kiss away the tears the younger man had shed over the simplest things.

He sighed. He just prayed Nick kept his promise in coming to see their father figure as soon as possible.

Otherwise... otherwise...

He didn't even want to think how they would break the news to Kevin that the man he loved the most wasn't there the first and probably last time he had ever really needed him. As he walked over slowly, he could see both his friends clutching to each other. He could see they were both crying. Feeling his eyes filling up with new tears, he knelt in front of them and held them tightly to his chest. Each one of them placed their faces in either side of AJ's neck, as he, in response, buried his face in Brian soft strawberry hair, soon damp from his tears.

Time didn't seem to pass for the three friends that grieved over the person had had practically raised them. The person who had taken care of them for the past eight years every time one of them felt down or sick. The person who had been there for them whenever they needed him. Not really caring about their composure or their public image, they sobbed for their beloved friend.

The pulled apart as they heard a throat being cleared. AJ was the first to look up as Brian started rubbing his eyes with the back of his hands and Howie took a couple of calming breaths. The dark brown eyes of the group's resident wild child were met by the baby blues of their younger band member. However what surprised him the most was the fact that not even one single tear could be seen in the deep ocean blue eyes. Not one single trace of hurt or sorrow visible in the calm and neutral complex of the younger man. AJ sighed. Nothing had changed since the last time he had spoken with him, not even in the deepest of his memory and heart he could have found just one bit of love for any of them. Not one single memory of the past eight years they had shared with each other, but especially of the past three years Kevin and Nick had been together as a couple.

"You asked me to come." Nick stated as he looked at the three people who were hugging each other tightly until only a second ago, each one of them with their eyes red and puffy from their crying. They were completely strangers in the eyes of the young blond. He had been told he used to be part of a group with the three of them and another man, a dark haired man with piercing green eyes. They, his so called best friends and brothers, had also told him how he had been in love with the person that had been in the car accident with him. The one who had taken the worse part of the accident, since the other car had hit them on the driver side. Of course, Nick hadn't believe one word about his so called 'romance' with this man. It was just impossible. He couldn't be gay, let alone date a man nine years his senior.

"Yeah." Brian forced himself into a standing position as he faced the young kid he had once called his 'best friend' that now behaved like they were strangers, faceless men from the street. "The doctor said Kevin doesn't have much time left and he's been asking about you."

"Why didn't you tell him the truth? That I don't remember him and don't even care remembering him." The tall blond said with a small smirk in his lips. That *man* was asking for him. That man still thought he was in love with him. He was believing and living a lie.

"So we break his heart?! No Nick. Even if you don't care about him, we *do*. We *do*. And we're not gonna let him die without seeing the one he loves." AJ said forcefully as he tried to contain his anger and not punch the stupid brat square on the face for his smugness. Who the fucking hell did he think he was? If it hadn't been for Kevin, Nick would have died. But of course, Kevin had preferred the car hit them on the drivers side than even risk Nick getting hurt. That was why Nick had gotten out with just a couple of scratches while Kevin had been trapped between the metal of their car and had gotten several injuries, the internal bleeding being too much for his already tired and hurt body.

"What do you want me to do? Lie to him?" His voice held no emotion as his face showed that nothing about it all was touching him in the last bit. His heart, surprising as it may be, was cold as ice.

"Actually, yeah. You're gonna lie to him," stated Howie as tried to seek some kindness in the heart of the man who he used to think of as his 'kid brother.' As he looked at Nick's frozen blue eyes, he couldn't believe they were the very same eyes that had talked with him and the rest of the guys three years ago when both him and Kevin had shocked them with the news they were together. Not only him, but also Brian and AJ had looked at the new couple, and upon seeing their eyes showing as much love as a person could muster, had came to realize there was nothing they could do. They were in love and it was obvious to whoever cared enough to look at them with the right eye.

"All you have to do is be there with him. Hold his hand and just look at him. It's gonna be enough for him." Finished AJ for his best friend.

"What if he wants me to kiss him? I ain't kissing any fucking queer." Nick said with pure hatred as he half spit the last word.

Brian, blinded by the rage and helpless he was feeling, moved over to where Nick was standing with one quick motion and held the taller and much heavier man by the collar, pushing him right against the wall. Placing his arm against the blonde's chest and with his right hand on the younger man's neck, he spoke through clenched teeth. "Don't you dare say those things about my cousin. Do you hear me? And for your information, as much as you deny it, you *are* a *fucking queer* as well." Brian stated as he used the same words Nick had used, even though he didn't mean them as much as the other man had.

Nick, feeling himself short of air by the older man's hand precisely placed in his throat, was only able to nod. He hated the fact that such a short and lighter man had such a powerful grasp, specially in his neck, and had to accept something he had said. He'd do what they wanted, but only this time. Only this time.

The guys looked at each other and let out a sigh of relieve. This was the second time in the same day they had heard Brian use the *f* word and didn't really want to find out what he'd be able to do if he was pushed enough. Even though he was a peaceful person by nature, when anyone threatened his close family -- and it didn't get any closer than the five of them -- he had a very bad temper. Kevin had often warned them about it: never to test a Richardson.

"Good." His voice hold a softer tone as his hand left the throat of the younger man. "Good." Brian turned around and saw his friends. "It's better if we get in there."

Both AJ and Howie nodded at him. It was better. They didn't know exactly how long they had with Kevin and the doctor had said that the best would be for them to *be* with him as much as possible.

Brian opened the door of the room slightly, not really wanting to disturb the sleeping figure. The younger Kentucky cousin walked over to the side of the bed as he gazed upon his beloved cousin. He looked so peaceful when he was sleeping. Those were the only times when Brian could actually tell all the worries Kevin had, as the father figure and almost manager of the guys, left him and he could just relax for the time being. His stunning green eyes were closed from the world and his breathing almost imperceptible. The only indication he was still alive to his friends was the slow rising of his chest in a synchronized motion with the steady beeping of the heart monitor.

"Kevin." He called softly as he leaned down and caressed the older man's cheek. "Kevin. Nicky is here." It hurt Brian that the person that meant the most to his cousin didn't give him a second thought about his condition.

The twenty-nine year old opened his eyes slightly, fighting the urge he had just to keep them shut and succumb to darkness. However he fought hard enough knowing he was going to see the one he love. Needing too see him, half knowing this was going to be the last time his eyes would come upon the angelic face of the man that was the keeper of his heart.

Trying to ignore the tiredness his body felt, he struggled to keep his eyes open and did his best in smiling at the young blond. "Nicky." Kevin said softly and tenderly as he was able to see the golden blond hair and aqua blue eyes.

AJ half pushed Nick over to the side of Kevin's bed, as the young blond had stood frozen in the threshold of the hospital door. Looking over at his two friends, the three singers made their way to the end of the bed, wanting to see Kevin, but at the same time not wanting to intrude the last moments of the couple.

"Hey." Nick said just as softly. His throat felt suddenly dry as the words left his mouth. He was dealing with a man that still believed he loved him. He didn't know what to do, what to say or how to act.

"I've missed you baby. The guys told me you left for the hotel." Kevin's voice was nothing compared to the strong and deep sound the guys were used to whenever the older man spoke. Now his voice sounded soft and insecure, weak and fragile. Things that had never been related to their father figure.

"Yeah, I had to leave." The young blond answered as he turned around to see the other three men in the room. Brian nodded at him and moved his hand in a forward movement, motioning for him to keep their shared lie. "I..." Nick started as he turned to look at the man laying down on the bed. "I had to go change."

Kevin smiled slightly. "The guys told me." Looking at the baby blue eyes of the man he loved and had been waiting to see for the past two days, he put all his strength in lifting his hand so he could touch the pearl white cheek of his love.

Nick, seeing this, got a hold on the older man's hand and brought it to his own cheek, rubbing the back of his hand against his soft skin. He fought hard not to grimace at the intimate touch with another man, forcing himself to keep a neutral look for the sake of the dying man.

Kevin tried to laugh, but the effort made his soft laugh end up in a cough. "Do you remember that time we were over in Switzerland and we went out for an early dinner. Just the two of us. How we walked down the autumn streets and sat by the park." He had to stop mid-sentence to take a deep breath before continuing his journey down the path of remembrance. "How we just sat there, oblivious to the rest of the world as we watch the sunset. We cut it really closed that night, we barely made it before the concert."

Nick nodded. "Yeah, it was beautiful." He didn't remember that night. He didn't remember Switzerland or dinner or the park. He didn't remember cutting close to the concert. But most important of all, he didn't remember the love he had once felt for Kevin.

"That's one of my favorite memories love. That and the night we confessed our love. Do you remember?" His voice seemed even softer than before. The dry feeling he had in his throat wasn't helping him. The tiredness in his body seemed consuming for a moment as he forced himself to stay awake. Just a couple more minutes with his love. Just a couple more minutes.

Nick felt himself in a crossroad. He couldn't say he did remember when he actually didn't remember anything before two days ago: the moment he had woken up on the ER of the hospital and was told he had been in a car accident. But then again, if he said he didn't remember, the whole facade would come crushing in front of his eyes.

The young man felt the breath come back to him as he heard Kevin start speaking of the night in question. "You had been sick with the flue." The dark haired man said with a small smile on his lips, something far more painful and tiring than it looked like. "The guys wanted to go out clubbing, so I stayed in with you. You were so sick..." His voice seemed to extinguish for a moment before he continued his tale. "You wanted me to sleep with you, so I crawled into your bed and held you close. Just like I had so many times before." He tried his best to rub his tired and weak fingers along the pale white skin of his perfectly sculpted cheek. "But it was different. Somehow, it was different." Moisture came to his eyes at the fond and cherished memory. "I felt it Nicky. Something had changed the minute I held you close to my chest and you snuggled up in the crook of my neck. You felt it too." A single and silent tear made its way down the older man's cheek, falling as in slow motion on the soft pillow. "I told you I loved you, and you answered me you loved me too. But that, too, was different. We were, quietly as we had, telling each our deepest feelings. We were opening with each other." His lips began to tremble as a pair of twin tears made their way down to the pillow. "It was like a piece of me had been missing until that moment. Until the moment I felt you in my arms." With a sighed of tiredness, he finished his tale. "I had fallen in love with the most incredible, sweet, caring and kind man I had ever met. I had fallen in love with you." His deep green eyes shone with unshed tears even though a couple of them had made their way down his cheeks.

The guys were standing by the end of Kevin's bed, each one of them with tears in their eyes. Brian had long ago given up on his composure and was letting his tears run freely down his cheeks. It was heartbreaking for him to see his cousin talking about the most private and beautiful moments of him and Nick when, this man that *was* Nick, didn't really remember any of it. AJ was holding his shades in his hand, as he watched one of the most amazing scenes unfolding in front of his eyes. He felt his heart shatter at the pain and loss for both his friends. One of them dying as the minutes passed by, the other one living a life without the knowledge of their love. Howie had felt his eyes start to water as soon as Kevin's tale had began. He could almost *feel* Kevin's love for the younger man and, if that wasn't enough, it shone so deeply in the twin emeralds that Kevin had for eyes.

"I love you Nick. I've always loved you. You're the first thing I see in the mornings and the last thing I see at night. I love you. I'll always love you." Kevin's voice was hoarse with emotion as his tears took the best of him. He wanted -- needed -- Nick to know exactly how he felt, since he knew he wasn't going to be there for long.

Nick looked at the older man with tears in his eyes as he realized just how deep Kevin's feelings were. How much in love he was. But Kevin didn't know the truth. He didn't know that Nick had no memory of them together. He didn't know Nick didn't feel the same way. Nick was a different person. He had no recollection of his past, and didn't really care. People had told him about his life before the accident, but for him it was like a long forgotten memory. Like the four people everyone thought were like his 'brothers', for him they were just four strangers.

"You'll get through this Nick. I know you will. You'll have the guys with you." Kevin whispered as he gave one tender and meaningful glance at his three friends, silently requesting their support in what he thought would be a tough and long journey for the young blond.

Brian, with tears still running down his cheeks, nodded slightly, not trusting his voice at all as his heart broke down with unspoken grief.

"Everything is going to be ok baby. Everything is going to be ok. I'm gonna be watching you, you know? I'll take care of you forever, just like I promised you. I'll always be with you, even if you can't see me. I'll always be with you here." Kevin said as he softly rubbed the spot where Nick's heart beat underneath in the young man's chest. "I'll always be with you." His voice was barely above a whisper.

"I love you." Kevin breathed out.

With his eyes red from the tears he was trying his best to hold back, Nick answered just as softly. "I love you too."

His sapphire green eyes locked with the beautiful sea blue eyes of his love, Kevin took one last look at the man who meant the world to him. Engraving his golden blond locks, his pearl white skin, pink soft lips and shinning royal blue eyes in his mind, Kevin knew that was the one memory he would hold dear in his heart for the rest of eternity. His love looking right back at him. With a small but tender smile on his lips, Kevin let out a soft sigh as his eyes closed for the last time.

Nick felt Kevin's hand, that was securely held between his own, go limp as the older man closed his eyes. Life had just left the person that, not so long ago, had meant the world to him. The one he had loved, had died.

The twenty year old heard a gasp from behind him, a muffled cry of denial, a prayer to the Man above, then cries and sobs from all three of them. Nick looked at Kevin's peaceful face laying on the soft pillow. His face was calm, relaxed and he could almost believe he was sleeping instead of dead. Almost.

Slowly, Nick placed Kevin's hand on the side of the bed as he walked over to the door. Opening it with a tired hand, he walked into the dark hallway. He didn't see AJ, Howie and Brian moving over to where Kevin was laying. Nick didn't see Brian kneeling at one side of the bed, burying his face in his cousin's chest as his sobs rocked his tired and already weak body. Nick didn't see AJ half laying next to Kevin in the bed, as he hid his face in the dark haired man's neck, his tears running freely onto the pillow as hiccups consumed his body while crying. Nick didn't see Howie steadying himself as he leaned against the end of the bed when his knees had given out after Kevin's last breath, while biting his lower lip to keep them from trembling and letting his tears fall mercilessly onto the hospital's bed sheets.

Nick didn't see the three friends crumble over the death of the one who had taken care of them for the past eight years, the one that had been there for them. The one that had loved them and wouldn't have hesitated in giving his life for them. And in a way, he had. Kevin had given his life for the younger singer. Something that not even Nick knew, since only the three friends had been with the police as they had given them their report. Kevin had turned around fast enough so when their car crashed against the nearby wall, *his* side was the one that got hit. He had died for the younger man, and Nick didn't know that.

The young blond walked down the hospital hallway, never turning back. His heart seemed to contract as he remembered Kevin had died never knowing the truth. Not knowing Nick had lost his memory. He'll never know Nick didn't remember their first meeting eight years ago when he was only a scrawny twelve year old. He'll never know Nick didn't remember the first time Kevin had kissed away his tears when he had broken his leg after falling from a tree. He'll never know Nick didn't remember their first kiss or the first time they were together. He'll never know Nick had no recollection of that romantic getaway two months ago when Kevin wined and dined and slow danced him under soft and dim candle light. He'll never known Nick didn't remember what happened next.

But then again, Nick had lost the most beautiful memories someone could ever have. He'll never know just how much Kevin loved him. He'll never know the sheer bliss of just seeing the one who means the world to you give you a simple smile. He'll never know how much in love the two of them were and how the two last years were the best for the young singer.

As Nick stepped out of the hospital sliding door and into the freezing New York night, he pulled up the collar of his black rain coat. Feeling cold metal against his left cheek, he looked at his hand. There, shinning under just enough light of the street post, was a simple white gold band with an encrusted diamond around his annular finger. His blue eyes were transfixed with the piece of jewelry as he tried to remember the moment he had gotten it. A moment forever lost in his memory.

Slowly, as in slow motion, he placed his thumb and forefinger on either side of the ring. Taking it out of the safety of its designated place until the end of eternity, he held it between his fingers. Giving the meaningful jewel one last look, Nick let it fall out of his fingers and, with a perfect lined movement, onto the white and cold winter snow.

Placing his hands in his coat pockets, protecting them from the forceful and frigid wind, Nick made his way down the street and into the parking lot. He promised himself never again to think about that night. Not to think about what he had lost and what he could have had. Not to think about his past. With the knowledge, and acceptance that came with that, he made his choice about his past and future.

He had chosen not to remember...

He had chosen not to believe...

He had chosen not to know...