Willie's humanitarian impulses are defeated by his boss' lechery; Doug
overestimates his fix-it skills.
Written by Marshall Herskovitz; produced by Nigel McKeand; directed by
James
Broderick.
Shera Danese: Bambi.
Marty Ingels: Gip Goddard.
Mimi Kennedy: Karen.
Pat Corley: driver.
Kate: Elaine's had some work done at her house. She says the
plumber is
a genius. I'm gonna call her and get his number. Doug: Oh no, honey, honey, I wouldn't do that. It'd just be
another 45
dollars down the drain. Kate: Even that's better than nothing down the drain.
Willie: What are you doing? Doug: Oh, we had some trouble with the shower upstairs. Your
mother
hired a plumber for 85 dollars -- he only made matters
worse! Willie: So you're taking care of it? Doug: Yeah. I could use a little help, if you've got the
time. Willie: Oh, I'm sorry, Dad, I have to get into the office early
today.
Two really wild things happened yesterday. Gip Goddard told me I could
hire a
secretary -- Doug: That's very impressive. Willie: Well, I already hired one -- Doug: You know what I discovered? There are three pipes.
There
should only be two pipes -- one for hot, and one for cold. You
hired someone? Willie: Yeah! You'll never guess who. Bambi Deering! Doug: See, that's the problem -- the third pipe! The third pipe
is
causing a pressure buildup! [pause] Do I know Bambi Deering? Willie: From my birthday last year! She spent the evening with
us! She
helped us patch things up... Doug: Aah. That Bambi Deering. The one who was a... Willie: Yeah. Yeah. She's the one I hired. Doug: Oh. [fake smile] Well, say hello.
[Bambi, sitting at typewriter, takes off jacket to reveal fairly
slutty outfit] Bambi: Oh... I knew it wasn't right -- but believe me, it was
the best
one of the lot. Willie: No, that's OK. Bambi: No, it isn't. Why don't we just forget the whole
thing? Willie: No way! C'mon. [helps her back into her
jacket] Bambi: Willie? What? Where're we going? Willie: The college shop at the nearest department store. Bambi: College shop? Oh! You know, I used to know this guy -- he
used
to like me to wear those knee-socks... Uh, never mind.
