Colonel T. C. McQueen stared out of his hospital room window. Six weeks 
      and no word about the war. Nothing. He heard footsteps behind him. 
      Thinking it was his nurse, he spoke, "It's not one yet; not time for 
      vitals check and medication." 
      "Sir?" 
      McQueen twisted around to behold the owner of that voice. There stood 
      Vanessa Damphoose in a hospital issue robe, an IV stuck into her arm. 
      "Damphoose!" McQueen reached out to her and captured her hand. 
      "Sir," Vanessa said, grinning from ear to ear. 
      "How..." 
      "I don't know, sir. Head injury. Last thing I remember is being on the 
      'Toga. Not much after that. They say that's normal." 
      "Wang, Vanson?" 
      "Paul is just been moved out of the ICU today. He woke up yesterday. I 
      think Shane's onboard the Saratoga again, with Nathan and Cooper." 
      "Thank God." 
      "Sir, I need to leave. The nurse doesn't know I'm gone. Plus, I want to be 
      there when they bring Paul in." 
      "I understand," McQueen paused, glancing at the door, "but I think you've 
      already been caught." 
      "You're certainly correct, Corneal," Nurse Keller interjected, bustling 
      into the room. "Now, young lady, who are you and what are you doing here?" 

      "This is Vanessa Damphoose, one of the 58th Wildcards, recently risen from 
      the dead." 
      The woman merely raised an eyebrow. 
      "I think you're about to be confined to quarters." 
      "Yes, sir," Vanessa replied, "only........." 
      "Only what, 'Phoose?" 
      "They haven't told our families we're O.K." 
      "How do you know?" 
      "Because mine would be here." 
      McQueen looked at the nurse. "Keller, would you be so kind to make sure 
      that both Lieutenants Damphoose and Wang get access to a video phone?" 
      "I think I can arrange that." 
      "Thank you." 
      "Thank you, sir." 



      Vanessa and Paul sat, both emotionally drained from speaking with their 
      families. Vanessa had one more call to make. She reached for the phone 
      controls. Paul looked at her. 
      "Vanson?" 
      "Yeah, if Shane hasn't called already this may be hairy." 
      "I'd rather be back in that cargo compartment." 
      Vanessa smiled weakly and completed the call. The face of a teenage girl 
      filled the screen. She looked awful. Her eyes were red and puffy from 
      crying. From behind her, Vanessa heard Paul gasp and mutter, "God, they 
      look alike." 
      Ignoring him, Vanessa started, "Are you Lauren Vanson?" 
      "Yes, who are you?" 
      "My name is Vanessa Damphoose. I serve with your sister." 
      "You mean served. My sister is dead." 
      The finality in the girl's voice made Vanessa's heart ache. "No, she's 
      not." 
      "What?" 
      "Shane's is alive." 
      "Is this is some kind of sick joke?" 
      "No, no joke. I swear." 
      "Oh my God............" the girl began to sob. 
      From off screen, Vanessa heard a voice calling, "Lauren, what's wrong? 
      What is it?" 
      The girl moved away form the screen, "Anne...." 
      The rest of the conversation was lost, babble filling up the connection. 
      From the sound of it, Vanessa figured she must have excited the whole 
      household. A man suddenly appeared on the screen. 
      "I'm Anne's husband, Ed; Shane's brother-in-law. What's going on? Lauren 
      said that Shane's alive." 
      "Yes, that right." 
      "But the Corps. sent us...." 
      "I know; they listed her KIA. Me too. But we're not. She's alive and 
      well." 
      "Why haven't we been official notified? Why hasn't she called?" 
      "It's not exactly official. She may not have been able to call you yet. 
      She's in hot water right now." 
      "Where is she?" 
      "I can't tell you because I don't know." 
      "But she's alive?" 
      "Yes. She was there when they loaded me onto the medavac. Saw her with my 
      own eyes. I was with her from the time we went down until we were rescued. 
      She is most certainly alive." 
      "Thank you so much." 
      "You're welcome." 
      The screen went black. Vanessa looked at Paul, who voiced their mutual 
      thought. 
      "Why hasn't she called?" 



      Vanson sat in the conference room, next to Ross, across from the head of 
      the earth forces. Thing were not going well. 
      "So, after you reveal the plans for the most important offensive in the 
      history of Earth to the enemy, are returned unharmed from their prison, 
      and say that you trust them impeccably, and you expect us to trust you 
      with the future of our species? I think not!" 
      Ross broke in, "Sirs, I know this is hard for you to accept, but Vanson 
      has shown nothing but excellence in service and loyalty........" 
      "That is not your decision to make. Commodore. I suggest that you not let 
      your personal feelings interfere with your professional judgment." 
      "Sirs?" Vanson interrupted. 
      Every pair of eyes were suddenly glued to the young woman. 
      "The Major had hoped it would not come to this, but the Major sees no 
      other option." With determination, Shane rose from behind the table and 
      moved to the middle of the room. With lightening moves, she produced a 
      hidden k-bar from her clothing. Before anyone could move to stop her, she 
      had sliced into her arm. 
      "Vanson!" Ross grabbed the young woman by the shoulder causing her to drop 
      the weapon. 
      "Sir, you don't understand, Sir." 
      Shane managed to thrust her hand into her wound and grabbed at something 
      embedded in it. Ross released her as he saw her extract a chip from her 
      bleeding arm. 
      "Vanson?" 
      She dropped the chip on the table. "This will contain verification of all 
      I've said. I hoped I wouldn't have had to extract it." 
      Ross noticed that she was bleeding more heavily than before. He quickly 
      moved to staunch the flow of blood. 
      Shane continued, "If you still have doubts, this should put them to rest." 

      "Why?" 
      Shane, feeling woozy from the blood loss, replied, "Why what?" 
      "Why should we believe they want peace?" 
      "They saw what I did, what we did, telling them about roundhammer as an 
      act of compassion. A compassion they didn't think we were capable of." She 
      faltered, Ross supporting her. "They saw that we could feel and didn't 
      want the innocent to die." Her knees buckled, causing her to fall into the 
      Commodore's arms. "We showed them. We all did." 
      Ross could wait no more. He gathered the crumpled Major in his arms and 
      bolted for Sickbay. 



      Fuzzy shadows, lights and darks, and muffled sounds were the first thing 
      she became aware of. The second was the figure asleep in the chair next to 
      her bed. She softly smiled at him, memorizing his features. In the soft 
      light, he looked so young. She saw the man, no the boy, he would be if 
      this war had never happened. She had never looked that innocent, was her 
      next conscious thought. Her innocence had been cut tragically short one 
      night that repeated in her dreams. She wished he could always look like 
      that, no troubles, no worries. Suddenly, his eyes opened and the illusion 
      was gone. 
      "Nathan." 
      He sat up and leaned forward in his chair, capturing her hand in his. His 
      reproaching stare needed no words to accompany it. 
      "I had to Nathan." 
      "You had to slice open your arm and bleed all over the Commodore." 
      "I had to. Don't you see? They didn't believe me!" 
      "You opened two veins and artery." 
      "I had to." 
      "The doctor said you were lucky. Any more and you would have needed a tran 
      Go back to Kylen, Nathan. She won't hurt you." 
      "I won't let you go." 
      "It's not your choice. I'm already gone." 
      She turned away from him, staring at the wall. 
      "Damnit!" She heard him swear and move away from her. As his footsteps 
      faded away, the tears rolled down Shane's face. Eventually she fell 
      asleep. 
      The next time she woke up, she saw Hawks sitting by her bed. 
      "Cooper," she smiled. 
      "Hey," Hawkes smiled at her. "How you feelin'?" 
      "Like I wanna get outta here." 
      Suddenly, the big tank looked down at his hands. 
      "What is it, Hawkes?" 
      He looked at her with an expression that would prompt 'Phoose to say 
      'busted'. "What happened to West?" 
      "What?" 
      "He is one pissed off marine." 
      "He'll get over it." 
      Cooper looked at her, analytically. "Yeah, but will you?" 
      Shane, shocked, wondered how much Cooper knew. "Ya know, Coop, for a 
      six-year-old, you know allot." 
      "Yeah," he grinned. Then he looked at her. "I gotta go. We're pulling a 
      patrol. Remyton'all shoot me." 
      Hawkes left, leaving Shane alone with her thoughts. Her solitude was a 
      short one. Commodore Ross smiled as the Major tried to snap to attention. 
      "As you were." 
      "Sir?" 
      "They're shipping you home." 
      "Sir?" 
      "They believe you. They just don't want to be reminded that you were right 
      and they were wrong. For what they wanted to string you up for, turned out 
      to be the miracle we prayed for." 
      "I didn't do it alone, Sir." 
      "I know. You move out in five hours." 



      han ran his fingers through his sweat soaked hair as he and Cooper walked 
      down the corridor. They had just gotten back from patrol. At the end of 
      the corridor, Nathan saw her. She met his eyes briefly before she stepped 
      through a hatch, onto the flight deck. 
      ane!" 
      the time he and Cooper reached the hatch, it had been sealed. They dashed 
      for the observation lounge just in time to see the transport drop through 
      the floor. Nathan slammed his fist into the glass. 
      at won't change her orders, son." 
      h pilots whirled around to find the Commodore watching them. 
      r?" 
      ey sent her home." 
      y?" 
      at's classified, but I can tell you this much. She didn't leave in 
      custody." 



      Six weeks later, Shane set foot on the base in Loxly, Alabama for the 
      first time since boot camp. She knew she had a choice to make, and she 
      wanted her suspicions confirmed before she made it. She approached the 
      medical building. She hated doctors. 



      "Major, are you sure this is what you want?" 
      "Yes, sir. I want to resign." 
      The corneal sighed. There was nothing he could do. She had been given a 
      choice and she'd made it. 



      Shane stood on the doorstep of the comfortable suburban home. The winter 
      sunshine glinted off the house's windows. She could picture what the 
      inside looked like. The tree was sparkling in one corner. Wrapping paper 
      was scattered all over the floor. Marion, not quite one, would be the 
      focus of cameras in all directions. It would be loving and happy. She 
      urned to be part of that. It had been so long. But she couldn't force 
      herself to knock on the door. 
      You can do this, she told herself. Be brave. She knocked. Someone walked 
      toward the door. An unfamiliar, elderly face appeared at the door. 
      "I'm sorry," Shane stammered. "I must have the wrong house." 
      "Shane!" A voice shrieked. Lauren streaked through the door and flung 
      herself into her sister's arms. Shane began to cry. Suddenly she was 
      inside, and Anne was there, encircling both of her sisters in a crushing 
      embrace. 
      When she was released, Shane looked around the room, seeing unfamiliar 
      faces. 
      "Shane," Anne said, brushing her older sisters tears away, "this is Ed's 
      family and this," she picked up a child, "is Marion." 
      Shane took the child from her sister and marveled at the tiny person. She 
      knew she was crying, but didn't care. She hugged the little girl, knowing 
      there would soon be another. She bathed in the love of her family. 
      Later that night, when all the quests were gone and everyone asleep, Shane 
      sat alone in the darkened kitchen. Her hands were clasped over her 
      stomach, and she stared into space. She knew he was there before he spoke. 

      "Shouldn't you be in bed, Ed?" 
      "I was wondering about you." 
      She smiled, "Can't sleep." 
      "Want to talk about it?" 
      "No." She got up and headed up stairs. "I won't be staying long." 
      "Shane," he grabbed her hand, "you just got here. We haven't seen you for 
      nearly two years. Hell, we thought you were dead!" 
      "I know, Ed. I just can't stay." 
      "Talk about it in the morning. To Anne. To Lauren." 
      She nodded. 
      "Good night." 
      "It is, isn't it." 
      Shane did sleep. For once, t he nightmares left her alone, in peace. 



      Morning at her sister's house was a new and not entirely pleasant 
      experience for Shane. She wasn't used to the easy, laid back atmosphere. 
      It was also, in her opinion, too late for breakfast. She'd been up at 
      five, the same time that the revelry would have been sounded on the 
      Saratoga. She hadn't been looking forward to the concept of food, either. 
      Assuming that a run would clear her head and settle her stomach, Shane 
      left a note on the table and headed out. When she came back, soaked in 
      sweat, two hours later, the household was up and breakfast was nearly on 
      the table. 
      "Good morning, Shane!" Anne called from the stove. "You just have enough 
      time to change before we eat." 
      Shane nodded and headed up the stairs. Lauren called after her, "I threw 
      some clothes on your bed so you don't have to wear fatigues all the time." 

      "Thanks, kid." 
      Later, Shane headed downstairs to join the family for breakfast. She sat, 
      accepting the plate that Ed passed her. Momentarily, she was stunned. Real 
      eggs and bacon assaulted her senses. She sat looking at them, puzzled. 
      "Shane, what's wrong?" Anne asked. 
      Shane grinned at her. "Sorry, it's just been a long time since I've had 
      eggs that didn't start out as a powder." She took a bit. "Heaven." 
      As she helped with the dishes, reality finally caught up with her. She 
      stood, her hands in soapy water, staring out the window. 
      "Shane, Shane? Are you listen to me?" 
      "What?" 
      "I asked how long your leave is." 
      "I left." 
      "What? You don't mean you went A.W.A.L.?" 
      "No, Anne. I resigned." 
      "Why?" 
      "Two reasons really. One, I don't think I could go back. Fly, shoot, kill. 
      I've taken too many lives, and I can't go back. I'd choke and get everyone 
      killed. And two, the most important, I'm pregnant." 
      "What?! You're pregnant. Who, what, when, where?" 
      "No how?" 
      "I know how." 
      "Let's just say I would complicate things if I stayed in." 
      "Shane, what will you do?" 
      "I don't know. I can't stay here." 
      "Shane........" 
      "Don't, Anne. I don't belong here anymore." 
      A voice from the door interrupted them. "You can't leave! You just got 
      back!" 
      Shane turned to confront her youngest sister. "Lauren, you don't 
      understand..." 
      "You can't! I went back to school for you! I went to make you proud! You 
      have to stay!" 
      "Lauren, I can't." 
      "Why did you pretend to care?! You left us! You never even said good-bye! 
      And you didn't call!" 
      "Lauren...." 
      "We thought you were dead. If it hadn't been for Lieutenant Damphoose, we 
      wouldn't have known you were alive. If you weren't going to stay, why 
      didn't you stay dead!" Then the girl turned and fled. 
      Shane realized she was gripping the sink so hard her knuckles were white. 
      She slowly forced them to open. 
      "I was afraid of this," Anne said. "She took your leaving so hard." 
      "I thought it was best. I was just so damned tired of taking care of 
      everyone." 
      "It forced us to grow up." 
      "I shouldn't have gone. I should have stayed." 
      "You needed your own life." 
      Shane was silent for a moment. "I'll go talk to her." 
      She found Lauren out back, sitting under a sprawling oak tree. Shane 
      plopped down nest to her. "It's been along time since I've sat in dirt 
      without it being a foxhole." 
      Silence. 
      "I know you're disappointed that it has to be this way." 
      "That you abandon us again." 
      "I wouldn't call it abandonment." 
      "I would." 
      "Lauren, there's somebody whose life will be a hell of a lot more happier 
      if I wasn't in it. This is where he'll look." 
      "So I get to suffer." 
      "Please, honey. I can't go back. I've changed too much.: 
      "I know. I hate it." 
      Shane pulled her into a hug. "I love you, kiddo." 
      "I love you too. I'm sorry." 
      "So am I. So am I. For more things than you'll ever know." 



      Nathan and Cooper were back in Loxly. Five hours till leave. They sat in 
      their bunk with the rest of the 58th. The door to the barracks opened and 
      neither moved. 
      "What do you think? I've never seen such sad faces on Marines before 
      leave." 
      "I don't know. Depends on where leave is." 
      Nathan looked up in astonishment. Standing in the doorway were Paul and 
      Vanesssa. "Wang! 'Phoose!" 
      West and Hawkes engulfed their friends in hugs and backslapping. "You 
      ornery devils! You're up and moving!" 
      "Hey, we heal fast," Paul grinned. "It's all because of the lucky tee 
      shirt. He revealed the Cubs shirt under his fatigues. 
      "Ah, man!" Nathan exclaimed. "Please tell me somebody's washed that thing. 
      On second thought, don't answer." 
      Vanessa scanned the room. "Where's Shane?" 
      "She's not with you?" 
      "No." 
      Nathan and Copper exchanged looks. "We have allot to catch up on." 



      Seven months later, McQueen surveyed the bar he sat in. He knew she was 
      here. Then he saw her, the waitress. She was hard to miss. She waddled 
      through the place. His jaw tightened when he saw her face and it wasn't at 
      her scars. She stopped at his table without noticing who he was. 
      "What'll you have?" 
      "The bastard's head on a platter." 
      Shane gasped, her hand flying to the black eye she now sported. That voice 
      was very familiar. 
      "Corneal." 
      "Come one. We're leaving." 
      "But I have work......." 
      "Quit." 
      She nodded. "I'll meet you outside in ten minutes." 
      Ten minutes later, McQueen was ushering her into a cab. She told the 
      driver her address and settled back next to him. 
      "How did you find me?" 
      "I'm persistent. Who is he?" 
      "What?" 
      "The black eye, Vanson." 
      "A mistake." 
      "The father?" 
      Shane's arm went to her belly. "No, but it was a roof over my head." 
      They stopped at her apartment. "Get your things." 
      "I don't have anywhere to go." 
      "I'll find a place." 



      Shane sighed as she picked up Emma's toys. At five, her daughter was a 
      whirlwind of energy. As she bent over to retrieve a teddy bear, a flash of 
      light caught her eye. Her dog tags were lying in front of the couch. Emma 
      must have gotten into her drawers again. Shane took them in her hands. It 
      had been a long time. The last person she'd seen had been McQueen when 
      he'd gotten her a decent job, housing, and the hell away from an abusive 
      boyfriend. He'd said he'd want her to return the favor. 
      Emma, who'd been sitting on the front steps eating a popsicle, called out, 
      "Mamma, Mamma! Soldiers!" 
      Shane joined her on the steps, scooping the little girl up in her arms. 
      She stared at the Lieutenant on her front steps. 
      "Major Vanson, sir?" 
      "At one time, yes." 
      "You are asked, respectfully to come with me to Loxly." 
      "The reason?" 
      "Personal request from T.C. McQueen." 
      Shane sighed. "A moment to pack our bags, Lieutenant. A moment to pack our 
      bags." 



      Loxely had not changed. Shane smiled to herself as she watched the new 
      recruits getting chewed up and spit out by DIs. She held onto Emma's hand 
      tightly, knowing that the mischievous little girl would love to wonder off 
      in the bustle of the base. 
      She entered McQueen's outer office and spoke to the receptionist. 
      "My name is Vanson. He's expecting me?" 
      "Go on in." 
      Shane lead Emma to a row of chairs. "Sit here and don't move." 
      The child nodded. Shane disappeared into the inner office. 



      Emma Vanson pouted. She never got to do anything. They went to anew 
      exciting place and what did her mother say? Don't move. She never got to 
      have any fun. 



      Kylen West was not happy. They had been on their way to a dinner party, 
      and suddenly they were on a direct flight to Alabama. Nathan was agitated, 
      jumpy. He reminded her of the Nathan she'd met upon the Saratoga. He'd 
      apologized for the things he'd said and done after he'd went A.W.A.L., but 
      he'd carried a new grief with him. He'd never talked about it. She felt 
      her husband retreating farther and farther away from her. Hell, she wasn't 
      surprised. Their marriage had never been a happy one. Oh well, it wouldn't 
      last much longer anyway. They'd only kept it up for appearance sake. 



      Nathan entered McQueen's office and headed for the receptionist. "You 
      should wait here," he called over his shoulder to Kylen. She watched her 
      husband disappear into the inner office as she took a seat. She noticed a 
      little girl pouting in a nearby chair. She wondered what kind of parents 
      would leave such a child unattended. She noticed the girl eyeing her 
      evening bag, which had sequins and fringe. 
      "Would you like to see this?" 
      The girl nodded. "I'm not supposed to talk to strangers. But I guess it's 
      O.K." 
      "And why's that?" 
      "My mother's in the next room. All I'd have to do is scream and you'd be 
      sorry." 
      "What's your name?" 
      "Emma." 
      "Well, Emma, my name is Kylen, and I have no intention of hurting you." 
      "Was the man with you your husband?" 
      "Yes." 
      "My mommy doesn't have a husband." 
      "Oh." 
      "He looked familiar." 
      "He did?" 
      "MhmmHumm. I think I saw him in a picture or something." 



      West entered McQueen's office and was momentarily shocked into silence. 
      There sat Shane Vanson. Nathan's jaw tightened, remembering the last time 
      he'd seen her and the things they'd said. Then he addressed McQueen. 
      "Sir?" 
      "Sit, West. I was just telling Vanson that you were both being drafted." 
      "During peace time?" 
      "Apparently," Shane interjected, "that doesn't matter." 
      Neither she nor Nathan looked at each other. 
      "Vanson, I know this is difficult for you........" 
      "Respectfully, sir, you have no idea what this is like for me." 
      McQueen sighed. "I told you I'd collect." 
      Shane said nothing. 
      "What's this all about, sir?" Nathan asked. 
      "The AI threat is back, tenfold." 
      Both Shane and Nathan were silent. 
      "We need recon. We need the best. I'm planet bound because of the leg." 
      "Sir....." Shane sounded almost desperate. 
      "What's the matter, Vanson?" West's tone sounded harsh. "You never needed 
      a reason to spam AIs before." 
      Shane inwardly winced. "Shut up, Nathan." 
      "Enough," McQueen's tone was deadly. "You people were part of the best 
      unit in the Corps. history. You're both reissued your last rank. Hawkes, 
      Wang, and Damphoose have been pulled from their current assignments and 
      will meet you onboard the Saratoga. You leave immediately." 
      Shane looked like she was going to cry, "Sir, will you......?" 
      McQueen nodded. "I'll see she gets to your sisters in San Diego." 
      "Thank you," Shane replied, ignoring West's questioning look. 
      The three left the inner office and stepped into the outer one. There 
      Shane saw her daughter talking animatedly to a woman that Shane recognized 
      from Nathan's photo tag. Kylen. She swallowed the lump of fear and sadness 
      in her throat and called to her daughter. 
      "Emma, honey. Come here." 
      Emma bounced across the room to her mother. Shane squatted down and held 
      her daughter at arms length. Emma's smile disappeared when she saw the 
      tears in her mother's eyes. Mamma never cried. 
      "Mamma, what's wrong?" 
      Shane smiled at her young daughter. "Babydoll, you're gonna have to go 
      stay with Aunt Anne for awhile, O.K.?" 
      "Mamma...." 
      "Mamma's gotta go somewhere for awhile." 
      "I'll go to." 
      "No, baby." 
      "Mamma, please!" 
      Shane gathered the child in her arms. "Mamma loves you, sweetie. Don't you 
      ever forget that!" She picked Emma up and carried her to McQueen. "This is 
      Mamma's friend, Corneal McQueen. He's going to make sure you get to Aunt 
      Anne's O.K." She held the child tightly. "Be good." 
      Nathan looked at Kylen. She looked at him. Her expression said, 'Go, get 
      it over with.' He headed for the door. 
      Shane handed her daughter to McQueen and followed Nathan. He paused and 
      waited for her. Emma began to scream. "Mamma! Mamma! Come back! I'll be 
      good! Anything! Come back! Don't leave me! Mamma!" 
      Shane almost turned and ran back to her little girl, but suddenly Nathan 
      had an iron grip on her arm. "You'll just make it worse," he whispered. 
      Shane nodded as tears ran down her face. 



      They hadn't spoken since they'd left McQueen's office. Now they were 
      fifteen miks from docking. Nathan couldn't stand the silence any longer. 
      "How old is she?" 
      "Five." 
      "You could of told me." 
      "You assume she's yours." 
      "Bullshit, Shane." 
      "Listen, Nathan. You have your life, I have mine." 
      "Why the hell did you leave?" 
      "I had no choice. I had no idea what was going to happen." 
      "So you left?" 
      "You seemed to recover nicely." 
      The transport docked and the door slid open. Exiting, Nathan replied, 
      "What choice did I have? You disappeared!" 
      "Past is past, Nathan." 
      They were in the corridor. West reached out and grabbed her shoulders. 
      "I need to know." 
      "No," she lied. 
      Hurt, he lashed out. "So you just screwed your way out of the service. 
      Nice." 
      Shane slapped him. They stood, eyeing each other when a familiar voice 
      startled them. 
      "Welcome back," Ross retorted. 



      Wang, 'Phoose, and Hawkes sat in their quarters, reminiscing, waiting for 
      the arrival of their former squad mates. 
      "And then Hawkes says.........." Vanessa's tirade was interrupted by the 
      violent opening of the hatch. As the door slammed against the wall, and 
      equally violent Shane Vanson stormed in. 
      "Shane......." a pleading Nathan West followed her in. His check sported a 
      small, bright red handprint. "I apologize. It was uncalled for." 
      "Uncalled for?!" 
      "Well, maybe if you weren't being so secretive and hostile..........." 
      "Secretive?! Hostile?!" 
      "You're the one who disappeared for five years!" 
      "It is none of your business where I spend my life!" 
      "You've made that painfully obvious!" 
      "Look, Nathan, we don't have to spend God knows how long together, so why 
      don't we just suck it up, deal with it, and move on. I want to go home as 
      soon as possible." 
      "What else is new? You've been running away your whole life! Abandonment 
      seems to be your call in life!" 
      Shane moved to strike him, but Nathan easily blocked her blow, catching 
      her arm in his unyielding grip. "I let you hit me once. I won't let you 
      hurt me again." 
      Shane was furious. She and Nathan were locked in a death stare. 
      "Um, guys?" Cooper asked. "You wanna maybe enlighten us?" 
      "Shut up, Hawkes!" they chimed in unison. 
      Shane broke away from Nathan. She shucked her stuff on a bunk and headed 
      for the hatch. 
      "Where are you going?" Nathan called. 
      "If you must know, I'm heading for the showers." 
      "Fine!" 
      "Fine!" 
      Vanessa looked at Paul and Cooper. Paul cleared his throat. "Um, is just 
      me of did she not take a towel or clothes or anything? I mean, not that 
      that could be a bad thing.........." 
      Vanessa shot him a dirty look. "I'll go after her." 
      "Ahhh, 'Phoose..." 
      "Shut up, Paul." 
      Nathan, still steamed, watched Vanessa rummage through Shane's bag for the 
      things she needed. After she'd left, Nathan turned to Paul and Cooper. 
      "Hey." 
      "You wanna share what that was about?" Cooper questioned. 
      "No." 
      Wang sighed. "Oh, yes. This is going to be so much fun." 
      Nathan rolled his eyes. "The Tun still operational?" 
      "You know it," Wang replied. 
      "Then let's go. I'm buying." 
      "Lead the way, my man." 



      Shane accepted the towel from her friend gratefully. 
      "You want to talk about it?" 
      "No." 
      "It might help." 
      "It might not." 
      Vanessa sighed. Shane was just so stubborn. "We were worried about you. 
      You just disappeared." 
      "I'm fine. You can stop now." 
      "Girl, you are just all prickles today, aren't you?" 
      ne sighed bitterly, near tears. "I'm sorry, Vanessa. It's just......." 
      essa gathered her friend in her arms. "Tell me all about it." 



      Four hours later, both Shane and Vanessa sat on Shane's bunk, deep in 
      conversation. Shane had filled her friend in on the last five years, 
      editing out one important thing. Emma. Shane didn't know how to explain it 
      without dragging Nathan into it. Vanessa's questions had to be evaded. 
      "That doesn't explain Nathan." 
      "He was mad at me for leaving." 
      "Umm hmm." 
      "Vanessa, please. I really don't want to talk about it." 
      Vanessa's response was lost to the men's arrival. 
      "Hooyaah!" Wang exclaimed as he entered the room. "You should have seen 
      it! We wiped the floor with 'em." 
      "You didn't get in a fight did you?" Shane scolded. "You should have 
      waited for us." 
      Hawkes crossed the room, picked up his CO, and spun her around. "I believe 
      Vanson has just come back to us." 
      "Put me down!" 
      Cooper let her down, grinning. "We were just playing poker, ma, honest." 
      Shane momentarily froze at the mention of 'ma' but quickly recovered. 
      "Since when can you play poker?" 
      "He almost could have beaten you, Shane," Nathan broke in, offering the 
      white flag. 
      Shane accepted, "Believe it when I see it. Bunk down. Revelry's 0500." 
      "Yes, Sir!" came four mock serious replies and for awhile, everything was 
      fine. 



      Briefing at 0700. Shane was surprised how tired she was. I must be getting 
      old, she thought. How did I ever do this before. Ross entered the room, 
      ending her musings. 
      "Ten hut!" 
      "5-8," the Commodore began, "you have no idea how much pleasure it gives 
      me to stand here, handing you your assignment. Just like old times. But as 
      much as I enjoy this, I wish to hell I didn't have to do this. The AI Wars 
      is part of a history I hope never repeats itself. This time, it could be 
      worse. We don't know. That is where you come in. We know they have access 
      to both our technology and the Chigs technology. Combine that with an 
      enemy that feels no emotion whatsoever and has a vendetta against us and 
      it scares the hell out of me. We have three days until we reach the target 
      zone. You have a briefing at the same time tomorrow. Until then, enjoy 
      yourselves. Welcome home. Dismissed." 
      The 'Cards got up to leave. As Shane passed him, Ross pulled her aside and 
      handed her a piece of paper. 
      "This arrived this morning." 
      Shane read the message; Package delivered safely with few tears. Shane 
      smiled to herself. "Thank you, sir." 



      Later in the Tun, Shane, Paul, and Vanessa were watching Nathan and Coop 
      duke it out at the Foozball table. Well, Paul and Vanessa were watching 
      the game. Shane was staring at the full shot glass sitting in front of 
      her. She hadn't touched it since Vanessa had plopped it down in front of 
      her twenty minutes ago. A sudden commotion drew her attention to the game. 
      Coop had obviously just scored and was feeling proud of it. Shane grinned. 
      Just like old times. Almost. She suddenly noticed a group of 
      wet-behind-the-ears kids staring at them. She moaned. 
      "Man, those kids are making me feel old." 
      Vanessa grinned at her. "Just a little hero worship, Shane. Nothing wrong 
      with that." 
      Shane snorted and lifted her shot glass. "Here's to all the kids I'm gonna 
      scare the shit out of, to AI guts blasted everywhere, and to the first 
      drink I've had in five years." With that she downed the shot, immediately 
      thrown into a coughing fit as the liquid burned a path down her throat. 
      Paul began to pound her on the back. 
      "Good God, 'Phoose? What did you give her?" 
      Shane held up a finger and croaked, "Another." 
      Paul shook his head and got his friend a drink. 
      Shane was suddenly aware of a person standing over her. She looked up to 
      see a nervous kid waiting for her attention. She raised an eyebrow. 
      "I just wanted to say, um, how much I admire you, and your squad. The 58th 
      is legendary." 
      "Thanks." 
      "Any advise?" 
      Vanessa piped up. "Watch your six and keep your head down." 
      Shane looked at the young solider. "Go home alive." 
      By this time, Paul had returned and handed Shane her shot. She downed it, 
      got up, and left. Vanessa and the unnamed marine watched her go. 
      "What I miss?" questioned Paul. 



      "5-8, this is not merely the recon mission you were told it was. We have 
      reason to believe that the AIs have taken prisoners, and you know what 
      that means. If possible, you are to rescue those interned, after the data 
      is recovered. However, if things get hairy, you are ordered to get the 
      hell out of dodge. Your recon can not be lost. No heroics." 
      Shane contemplated the Commodore's words. She knew she wouldn't leave 
      anyone behind, not if she could help it. 
      "You leave in thirty miks. Dismissed." 
      As the Wildcards filed out, Shane stopped to talk Ross. "Sir?" 
      "What is it, Vanson." 
      "Sir, if I don't come back, will you do something for me?" 
      "No, because I expect you to come back." 
      "Sir, I need this." 
      "All right, Vanson. What is it?" 
      "Will you tell West I lied?" 
      "Tell West you lied?" 
      "Yes, sir." 
      "All right, but I do not intend to have to." 
      "Yes, sir." 



      The bunker was nestled between two hills. Through the binocs, Shane saw 
      only one guard. 
      "O.K. Here's the plan. West, Hawkes, Damphoose; take the right. Wang and I 
      will take the left. Jump the guard, pocket the memory core. Then we deal 
      with prisoners." 
      "Shane," Nathan interjected, "remember, the Commodore said no unnecessary 
      risks." 
      "I'm not leaving them. Move out." 
      The guard never knew what happened. Shane slit his mechanical throat 
      before he made a sound. "Quick, grab the core. They know we're here." 
      Vanessa extracted the memory core. Then the squad moved in. They split up 
      and down the corridor. Shane held up her hand. One, two, three. They burst 
      through the doors. Shane looked around. She quickly crossed the room to 
      what she thought was a human form crumbled on the floor. She turned it 
      over only to be met with the sadistic smile of an Elroy model. 
      "Scatter, it's a trap!" Shane managed to call before something slammed 
      into the back of her head. Stunned, she was unable to put up much of a 
      struggle as she was dragged into the corridor. She could see that her 
      warning had come to late. Wang and Damphoose were in the same position. As 
      they were all lined up in the corridor, the AIs forced them on their 
      knees. 
      "Well, well. Looky her, boys," a Felicity model crooned. "It's a little 
      Vanson girl. Let's have a little reenactment, shall we?" 
      "Go to hell." 
      A rifle but slammed into the side of Vanson's head. 
      "Shall we try this again?" 
      "Take a chance." 
      Felicity smiled. "That won't work this time, little one." Then she stepped 
      back, grinned, and fired. Nothing. 
      "Blanks. Did you really think you would get off that easy, Vanson. It 
      won't be just like mommy and daddy. Get them up." 
      The silicates hauled the marines up onto their feet. "First, you're going 
      to tell us what you know." 
      "I think not, " a voice sounded down the corridor as Hawkes and West fired 
      at the AIs. They dropped, their twittering silenced as the 58th climbed to 
      their feet. Looking at the two, Shane smiled, "What took you so long? Move 
      out to the extraction site." 
      As they were leaving, Shane suddenly had a feeling she had to go back. 
      "Vanson!" West called. "Where are you going?" 
      "I've got a feeling. A feeling that there are still people in there." 
      "It was a trap!" 
      "I'm going back." 
      "Like hell you are!" 
      "That could be me, 'Phoose, and Wang!" 
      "I am not bringing you back to your daughter in a body bag!" 
      Shane looked as though he'd hit her. "I'm goin' in." 
      "Damnit!" Nathan grabbed her did hit her. She slumped against him. "Great. 
      Assaulting an officer. Fun." He looked around. "Hawkes! Get over here and 
      take her pack!" 
      Cooper scooped up Shane's gear as Nathan hoisted the unconscious major 
      over his shoulder. 
      "You hit her." 
      "Kept her from goin' back in, didn't it?" 
      Copper grinned. "True, true." 
      The 58th loaded into ISSCV. After they had just cleared the planet's 
      gravity well, Shane began to regain conciseness. She sat up. 
      "Where...." 
      "You're back on the ISSCV," Nathan replied. 
      Groggy, Shane began to remember. She lashed out at Nathan who easily 
      caught her arms. "You idiot! Why didn't you let me go back?" 
      "You know why." 
      "She still would have had you!" Suddenly, Shane realized what she said and 
      bit her lip. She broke Nathan's hold and buried her head in her hands. She 
      began to sob, soundlessly. Nathan, stunned, sat infront of her, his hands 
      resting on her shoulders, silent as he contemplated her words. 
      "O.K. Now I KNOW we missed something," Paul cracked. 



      Loxely, Alabama. Shane sighed. She glanced at Nathan. She hoped she was 
      strong enough to face what lay ahead. The transport touched down. The 58th 
      filed out, glad to be home on leave. McQueen stood twenty feet away, a 
      small figure clinging to his hand. As Shane stepped out of the transport, 
      the figure broke free and dashed toward the marines. Shane dropped her 
      duffel and rushed toward the child. 
      "Mamma!" The little girl threw herself into her mother's waiting arms. 
      "Mamma!" 
      Shane whirled her around in a circle. "Emma! What are you doing here?" 
      "The Corneal brought me! He said I could stay with you!" 
      Shane saw that McQueen had stooped infront of her. "That is," he said, "if 
      your bunk mates don't mind." 
      Shane felt Vanessa's hand on her shoulder. The young woman set down 
      Shane's discarded duffel and smiled. "Oh, I don't think we'll mind." 



      Emma yawned. Her mother, noticing, decided to end the evening's 
      festivities. 
      "Emma, time for bed." 
      Emma, who had just finished rooting through the duffel bags of Paul, 
      Cooper, and 'Nessa as she called them, protested. "No, Mamma, please! I'm 
      not tired." 
      Paul picked up the little girl and tossed her into the air, causing her to 
      squeal in delight. "You need to listen to your mother.....or she'll 
      court-martial you!" he joked, tickling her as he handed her to Shane. 
      "Besides," Vanessa broke in, "Paul, Cooper, and I are going out to get 
      something to eat, so it'll be pretty boring around here." 
      Emma rolled her eyes. "Sure, that's what they all say." 
      Cooper gawfeed when the little girl said that. "You know, Major," he 
      teased, "she looks like you did when you decided to bargain with 
      Minx........" 
      "All right, all right," Shane drawled. "Enough. You grunts get out of here 
      so I can put my mutiness daughter to bed." 
      Her friends headed out the door.... all except Nathan. Shane looked at 
      him. He had remained silent durning the teasing session. She decided to 
      dive in head first, breaching the dreaded subject. She sat down next to 
      him with Emma on her lap. 
      "Emma," she began, "this is Nathan, remember?" 
      The little girl nodded, and sensing away to forestall the bed time 
      process, she held out her arms to him. Shane handed the child to her 
      friend and one time lover. The child looked at him. 
      "It's O.K. if I call him Nathan, Mamma?" 
      "No. It's O.K. if you call him Daddy." 
      "Shane...." Nathan began. 
      "She deserves to know, Nathan. She deserves to know what a wonderful, 
      caring, loving person her father is." 
      Emma looked at the man whose lap she was seated in. "You're my daddy?" the 
      little girl questioned. 
      Nathan nodded, unable to speak. 
      "Good," she said. "I like you." She wrapped her arms around Nathan's neck 
      in a choke hold hug. She grinned, "Can I have a pony?" 



      At the Asteroid, Vanessa was proposing a toast with the 'food' they'd gone 
      to get. 
      "To the Wildcards." 
      "To homecomings." 
      "To happy endings." 
      Paul downed his drink and speculated, "I wonder why West didn't come." 
      Cooper smirked, "I know why." 
      "Share." 
      "The Major is about to inform her daughter of her parentage, and for that, 
      my friends, West has a front row seat." 
      Vanessa snorted liquor out her nose. "You mean Shane and Nathan....." 
      "Duh, 'Phoose." 
      "But Kylen...." 
      "Listen up. It's better than a soap opera. After you guys went down, West 
      n' me, well we kinda went A.W.A.L. after ya. Kylen didn't get it 'n West 
      kinda sorta told her that it was over in so many words. He gave her back 
      the tag. Then, for reasons I don't wanna get into, right, I get thrown in 
      the brig. The next thing I know, there's Nathan with Shane in tow in the 
      middle of the night, talkin' about some plan to save the world. Anyway, 
      they leave, but the next day, he's lookin' at her like he used to look at 
      that photo tag." 
      "You're kidding." 
      "Nope. Gets better. She pulls some stunt, winds up in Sickbay, and he 
      refuses to leave her side. Then he comes bustin' out of there, madder'n 
      hell and almost puts his hand through a bulkhead. Won't even talk about 
      it. I go to see her, and she looks like she's been cryin' buckets. Shane 
      Vanson don't cry buckets. So I put two and two together. I may be young, 
      but I ain't stupid." 
      "A torrid affair," Paul surmised. "She tells him to get lost, go back to 
      Kylen. He gets pissed, and she disappears. Come on, Coop. That's movie of 
      the week kinda stuff. That is not Shane Vanson and Nathan West kinda 
      stuff." 
      "I call'em as I see'em." 
      "Paul, think about it," Vanessa reasoned. "Five years later, she shows up 
      with a five-year-old that she doesn't say a word about to any of us. You 
      know how proud she was of Marion, never stopped talking about her. And how 
      hostile she and Nathan were toward each other when they first came on 
      board." 
      "I still say it doesn't sound like them. I'm not saying it's not true, I'm 
      just saying it sounds to....." 
      "Romantic?" Vanessa interjected. 
      "Exactly." 
      "Like going A.W.A.L. for Kylen wasn't romantic. Like dancing in the Tun 
      with Oakes wasn't romantic." 
      "Okay, Okay. I surrender." 
      "Man," Hawkes grinned. "That kid is gonna be like hell to raise." 
      "How do you figure, Coop?" Vanessa questioned. 
      "Imagine," he answered, "Nathan's bullheadedness, Shane's determination, 
      both their tempers, and combine it to form one human being." 
      "May the Lord have mercy on their sorry souls," Paul deadpanned. 



      Nathan watched his daughter sleeping. His daughter. It was hard to 
      believe. He heard Shane approach him. 
      "She beautiful." 
      "I know." 
      "Why didn't you tell me?" 
      "I almost did, once. I got all the way to your office door, and I 
      chickened out. I didn't want to ruin your life. I decided one of us should 
      have the picket fence and the two point five kids. Picket fences make me 
      claustrophobic." 
      "I'd rather have jet fuel and you." 
      "Nathan, we've been down this path before. Kylen...." 
      "....served me with divorce papers the night before we left." 
      Shane looked at her hands, "What are we going to do?" 
      "Well, I thought I'd probably stay in for awhile. How would you feel about 
      making Emma a Marine Brat?" 
      "Nathan, you know I'm not staying in! I won't risk what happened to me 
      happening to Emma! I will not make her an orphan! I will not do that to 
      her!" 
      "Shane, I wasn't suggesting you stay in, although I think you're a fool if 
      you don't. E was asking you to marry me." 
      "What?" Shane stammered. 
      Nathan knelt infront of her, capturing her hand in his. "Shane Vanson, 
      will you marry me? I have been in love with you since the first day of 
      boot camp. Real love, not what I thought I felt for Kylen. I could live 
      without Kylen, I can't live without you. Not anymore. I want our daughter, 
      OUR DAUGHTER, to grow up with a mother and a father. And Shane, I want her 
      to have brothers and sisters. Shane, I want to spent the rest of my life 
      with you. You're my best friend. I love you." 
      Shane slowly sank to her knees, facing Nathan. "How can I say no to that?" 

      Nathan wrapped his arms around her and held her. 
      "You know," she said, her voice muffled in his shoulder, "you're parents 
      are gonna hate me." 
      "My parents loved you." 
      "They tolerated me." 
      "They'll love you. They'll be tickled to death to meet their 
      granddaughter." 
      "Oh, Nathan." 
      "I know." 
      "Semper fi." 
      "Always faithful." 
      The End

      © Stephanie Meyer 1998

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