The Enduring Man-Child (Registered User) Thursday, January 16, 2003 at 8:32:07 PM CST How about a new Coffeehouse thread, no strings attached? The drawer slowly slid open and The Enduring Man-Child (with a certain degree of difficulty) emerged from all the neckties into one of his favorite places in the universe (since it wasn't on earth), the Rescue Ranger Coffeehouse. And he had brought a companion with him--not from a Disney or an anime cartoon, but a genuine classic. "Eugene! Eugene, you in there?" Man-Child asked, scrabbling among the neckties. "Jeep! Jeep!" came the familar response from above him. And sure enough, Eugene the Magical Jeep was floating in the air over the Bureau Drawer With The Neckties. "Oh, there you are, boy!" Man-Child said, relieved. "Welcome to the Rescue Ranger Coffeehouse where we Rangerphiles, our original characters, our favorite toons, and sometimes even the Rescue Rangers themselves spend our off-time!" "Jeep! Jeep!" said Eugene. That is, after all, all he ever said. Man-Child pointed to the picture that adorned the wall behind the snack bar. It was a picture of the glue that held this diverse bunch together, the original five Rescue Rangers. "That's them!" he said happily. "So whaddaya think?" "Jeep! Jeep!" Eugene responded, disappearing briefly before reappearing a few feet higher. Eugene had a habit of disappearing and reappearing like that. "Oh the times we've had here, my friends and I!" Man-Child exclaimed wistfully. It's been such a long time. I can only wonder if any of them, their original characters, and various beloved toons will show up anytime soon. In fact, I wonder when we might have another grand adventure like we used to? Hmmm . . . " Eugene disappeared and reappeared by Man-Child's ear, though he didn't know it until he heard a very uncomfortable loud "Jeep! Jeep!" much too close for comfort. "Ow! Easy, Eugene! I know you're a beloved part of American popular culture and even history (if they really did name the Jeep vehicle after you and not as a contraction for the words 'General Purpose'), but please don't do that to me, okay? At least take it easy on the ears, boy!" "Jeep!" Eugene agreed. While Eugene the Magical Jeep floated here and there about the mostly empty Coffeehouse Man-Child kept one eye focused on the front door and the other on The Bureau Drawer With The Neckties, wondering if any of his Rangerphile or toon friends might show up. Neither did he know . . . ******************************************************************* Darkness. Somewhere, in some unlocatable, nameless void there was nothing but darkness. Until . . . Two evil fire-red eyes suddenly blazed forth with unholy light and a voice which was not so much a sound travelling through the air (since the very presence of air in this Void was debatable) but a spiritual miasma travelling from one lost soul to another was, for lack of a better word, heard. "FEAR ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" [Okay folks, I have no plot whatsoever in mind. I have no idea for an adventure or who the villain is. I just thought I'd start the ball rolling and see what, if anything, develops. Please hop right in if you want, but if you don't and the story dies on the vine (like my Hanna-Barbera thread did a while back), well, there's no harm done.] ---------------------------------------------------------------- Winston (Registered User) A few moments later... Winston suddenly stepped out of the shadows. He was wearing a green tie-dyed shirt, a pair of jeans, old battered black combat boots, and even older, more battered glasses. He had shoulder length hair, and, as was typical for him, hadn't bothered shaving in the last few days. He was also carrying a bundle of various electrical components and a pair of thick copper bars. "Hi." he said simply, waving to the occupants of the room. "Hello." The Man-Child waved back. "Jeep." A strange floating creature responded. "I guess I'm one of the first to pick up on the coming adventure, whatever it might happen to be." Winston commented, sitting at one of the tables, plunking down the equipment he was carrying. "So I suppose it's a matter of waiting, at this point. In the meantime, though... Let's see if I can get my magnetic mass driver prototype going in this universe." Winston grinned. "I've been having some trouble in MY universe, the power supplies and pneumatic injection equipment are just a bit out of my league there. However, I'm betting that in a universe with slightly, shall we say... looser rules, a bunch of fast discharge flashbulb capacitors should do the trick. Unless, of course, the dialectric ends up boiling and... nah, that won't happen." "Are you sure this is safe?" The Enduring Man-Child asked with a bit of concern. "Of course not." Winston shrugged. "But I've never yet managed to maim anyone in my universe, not even with the homemade circular saw, or the improvised exploding... uh, nevermind. The point is, I really wouldn't worry about it. Now, let's hope this place runs on 120 volt alternating current..." Winston began searching for an outlet. ****************************** Deep in the void, the creature wreathed in impenetrable shadow stirred from it's rest, eyes glowing, flickering red and orange with flaming malice and cruelty. It yawned, revealing for a brief second jaws filled with razor sharp black teeth like rows of deadly obsidian spikes, and a white hot glow burning from within, as if a searing fire was hidden deep in the body of this creature. Slowly it spread it's enormous, shadow-filled wings, stretching for the first time in a long while. At last, the creature still hidden within the cloud of menacing shadow that it's very essence exuded, it rose... and with a scream that would have frozen the blood and shattered the nerves of any living being, had any been around to hear it, it took flight... ----------------------------------------------------- SomeGhol (Registered User) With a groan, a thump, and a BANG, the Coffee House door slammed open... And inside stepped, of course, the perpetually disheveled form of SomeGhol. The Rangerphile took a moment to shake the snow from his coat and bush hat. The snow fell to the floor like so much dandruff, and melted into a respectful puddle. "Have to get a mop later." he muttered as he walked to the roaring fireplace in hopes of restoring circulation to his extremities. After a few moments of enjoying the fire, SomeGhol looked around the Coffee House, and found he wasn't alone. "Hey, EMC! How you doing? Been awhile." he said, crossing the floor and shaking the reputable authors hand. "JEEP!" "Huh?" the scruffy student was understandably confused by the response. The Enduring one grinned, and pointed over SomeGhol's shoulder. "What?" He asked, turning, only to find himself confronted with a very... strange creature. "JEEP JEEP!" "Jeep?" "It's a Jeep." Said EMC, "Don't you watch the classics?" "I'm not really a classy guy..." SomeGhol admitted, eyeing JEEP wearily. He wasn't sure about the mischievous look in the critter's eyes. "So, what are you doing here? Is there anyone..." Suddenly, a sharp CRACK was heard, the lights dimmed for a moment, and a figure shot up from behind the bar, muttering incoherently. "Winston?" "Yeah?" said the slightly fried writer as he tried to push his electrified hair back down on his head. "What happened? A couple of mice steal your razor too?" SomeGhol asked, noticing Winston's similar dishevelment. A tap on the shoulder turned him around, only to see the EMC shaking his head sadly. Before SomeGhol could frame a question, another tap brought him on an about face. "JEEP!!" Jeeped the Jeep, causing SomeGhol to stumble back into one of the many chairs that populated the Coffee House floor. "Ok, ok." he said while glaring at Jeep. "What exactly is that thing, and why are you guys here?" The other three occupants of the room looked at him, at each other, then back at SomeGhol. As one, they shrugged. "I wanted to test out my magnetic mass driver prototype would work on the Dragon Planet." Said Winston, holding up the gizmo, which quickly scampered away to look for a TV. Winston scowled, and picked up his contraption, which was steaming ever so slightly. "Is it safe?" asked SomeGhol, fearing that any moment Gadget would arrive and offer to "help" Winston with his invention. Winston tried once last time to smooth his hair down. "It's not deadly." "Oh, great." ______________________________________________________________________ In the clouds, high above Dragon Planet, a huge figure cut through the air. Flocks of birds, and birdlike creatures scattered out of its way as it swooped and dove, leaving a trail of sulpher and brimstone behind. A kid in green tights, who was flying through the air against all common sense, drew a tiny knife from his boot and waved to his twelve compatriots. "Come on Men! We shall slay the beast." The "Men", twelve boys dressed in some very unusual looking PJ's, made for an odd sight even if one discounted that they, like their leader, were flying. Despite being armed with an assortment of clubs, slings, and peashooters, the gaggle of preadolescents hesitated. "But Peter, that doesn't look like anything described in our contract." pointed out a kid garbed in spectacles and a nightshirt. The others nodded their agreement, and suggested that they go back home and dance with some Indian chicks. Peter was miffed. "Well, if you guys would rather go and dance with some pretty GIRL'S, than to do battle with a flying monster be my guests, but I'm going to have some FUN!" and with that, he was off, flying directly towards the beast. The others watched as the green figure drew closer to the monster, getting smaller and smaller as he went until finally he was merely a dot in the sky. Moments later a great belch of flame was seen, followed by a smoking dot falling towards the earth. The gang looked at each other. "I'm gona go dance with Tiger Lilly." said one boy, dressed as a Raccoon, before beating a hasty retreat." "Yeah, I think I'll go with you." said his twin as the monster seemed to take note of the odd flock. A chorus of "Yeah!" "I'm with you's" and "I always thought she was too good for him anyway's" was lost to the air as all the boys quickly followed suit. The monster traveled on. ---------------------------------------------------------------- Raven Warhammer (Registered User) The room remained silent... ...only fire cracked in the fireplace. SomeGhol and EMC took the chairs in front of it, enjoying the wormth, while Winston got back to his coils and wires. For some time all remained silent, even Jeep was not jeeping. But then EMC heard a wind whistling. "SomeGhol, did you closed the door?" - he asked. Student briefly replied - "Yes.", warming his hands. "Must`ve been my imagination..." - Man-Child turned to see the door nevertheless. It was closed allright. But he noticed one more figure in the room. One who doen`t look so nice. It took several seconds off him to recognise it. It was one of the newscomers to caffeehouse - Raven Warhammer. SomeGhol look around too. He winced when he saw him. Raven did not bothered to keep up with physical laws and instead of entering through the door or window or portal, he just appeared on the chair near the bar, toying with some microchips. "Not that Warhammer is bad or whatever." - thought SomeGhol - "He`s just weird." And that was not the thing to argue with. He was weird indeed - apart from openly weird appearance, including pointy ears, metallic wings, fangs and black trenchcoat, he hed even wierder behaviour, appearing from time to time, asking strange questions and giving ridiculous answers. Raven sayd - "Hhii!" loudly. Winston rised his head from the schematic to see, who was that. "Oh, hi yourself." - he replied briefly, before diving back in schematics. EMC and SomeGhol said some greetings too, wondering, what makes Raven to speak in such a slurred voice. Jeep also jeeped, but made it clear, thet he does not want to get away from EMC while Raven is around. "Doo yyouu havve anny iddeaa whheree Gaadgett coulld bbe?" - he asked. "She`ll be here soon, probabily." - replied SomeGhol. - Ggoodd, I`lll waiittt. - What happened to your voice, anyway? - Ssligght mmisccalllullaaatioon. Mmaybe Gaadgeeett wwoulld bee aablllee tto fiiixx iittt, sso Ii caannn ssspeakk Eeengliisssh noormmaaallyy. Winston turned his head again - "By any chance, do you have anything similar to vxb54-6? One I`ve got here is fried." - Oonnnly vvxccc54-4, - Raven replied, tossing the detail. Winston deftly grabbed it it air - "Will do. Thanks!" - Noo pprooob. Then all became silent again for a while. Raven took some time to look around, got bored and began assembling something of his own on the table. Room was mostly dark, so he removed his shades to see details. EMC cast a glance back and shuddered. Details were quite ordinary, but now they looked like they were dipped in blood. Raven`s eyes glowed with crimson light. "What a weird guy he is... Being a mage and having a nanotech fits sirely goes over the board." - Enduring Man-Child thought, turning away. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Shadowy figure flight forth. That little meal did not even awaken the hunger of the creature. But it knew - a larger meal awaits before. "How nice of master not to forbid some light snacks on the way..." Creature spotted something big. It had little sapient live, through - only two persons. But the load... Load was laden with good-natured feelings. Almost like it was a load of presents... Shadow made his mind. "Larger meal will not get away." And pursued the spotted pray. -------------------------------------------------------------- CD (Registered User) Next thing everyone knew, the goof-up and company entered the place "Just thought I'd drop by." CD greeted while he entered with Steve, Flora, Mercy and the two elder Nutcrackers. "No, you were just hoping to find Clarice here." Gus corrected him and installed himself in one of the chairs, his wife joining him. "Who's that?" CD wondered and pointed the creature in question. "He's Eugene the Jeep, THE Eugene Jeep." EMC informed him. "He kinda looks like Pikachu." CD couldn't help but notice. Before the conversation caught on, it was ended by new arrivals. "Nobody move! This is a raid!" Spoke Brain Eisner is his most Eisner'esque way, in such an Eisner voice that no one could ever match. Naturally, he was accompanied by Marshal Mickey and his nameless Lab Assistant, along with a group of the most rediculous soldiers anyone ever saw, just the look on their face explained they were stupid enough to think Alaska was an independant country. All in all, a very stereotypical raid. "Can I take your orders sirs? Oh, and lady." One of the servant robots asked. "Hmm? Oh! I want a glass of orange juice with a straw and a Dame Blanche." Eisner declared and turned back to the cafe before turning back to the servant again "And don't dare to forget to put one of those colorful umbrella's on my ice cream! I swear I'll make you regret it!" He shouted before he turned his attention to the bored Cafe go-ers. "Hey, don't we get anything?" The Lab Assistant asked but knew the answer would be 'No'. "I'm here for the secret of the Cafe!" The disembodied brain declared "I most know what makes this place so hot while my Disney Movies stink! Hand over the secret NOW or face the consequences!" "Help." Flora let out monotonously and took another gulp of her root beer. "Could anybody please safe us from his diabolical blathering?" Mercy called out, faking desperateness. No one seemed to be interested in mopping up the goons, some jobs were just to dirty to be done. The robbers simply stood there, waiting for something to happen. But no one moved to take them on or give in to their demand. Finally, one soldier got fed up. "Man, this stinks! I'm going home!" He declared, dropped his cartoon UZI and left. No one moved, waiting for action, which didn't come. It was going to be a looooooooooong wait for anybody interested in sending this bunch home with their teeth in their hands. ---------- Good day and who will rid us from the unimpressive Eisner Brain? ------------------------------------------------------------ Ronnie Rabbit (Registered User) Suddenly! A trap door in the floor opened, and a smallish orange rabbit popped out, bellowing, "Grrrrrr!" Well, all right, it more made a squeaky noise rather than bellowed, and it sounded a bit like "grrrr" , without any actual punctuation. It seemed to work fine, though. Clearly terrified of this inexplicable visage before them- or perhaps just eager for an excuse to satisfy their contractual obligations and get out of the story- the thugs scrambled over each other in their haste to escape out the door of the Cafe. Ronnie beamed proudly, then frowned. "Wait a moment..." he popped down into the trap door, then back out a moment later, and spread a map out on the floor. Leaning on the side of the hole, he studied the unfolded piece of paper closely. "This doesn't LOOK like Kokomo... I knew I shouldn't have taken directions from that scwewy wabbit!" Glancing around, he suddenly beamed again. "Wait- this is even better! I'm in the Cafe! Huzzah! Huzzah!!" He broke out an autograph book and a small orange camera, demanding, "Okay, where's Gadget? Confess! Who has her?" ***** In the Gummi Ship, Dale tapped Chip on the shoulder. "What is it now?" he snapped. "Flying this thing is trickier than I thought- this had better be important!" Dale pointed at the massive black cloud looming ahead of their path. It seemed, illogically, to have a gaping, hungry red maw, and burning eyes. "Izzat usually on the warp route to the Cafe?" ------------------------------------------------------------ Loki crossing the Atlantic (Unregistered User) Banzai! Once again the door banged open, this time admitting something that looked like a big fuzzy egg roll with feet, loping along in a rather clumsy run. Seeing that he was inside he attempted to stop, but slid gracelessly on the linoleum at the entryway shouting "Whoa!" until his forward progress was noisly arrested by the table and chairs he collided with, finally coming to rest in a tangled heap of fur and furniture. "Jeep?" said Eugene quizically. Ronnie Rabbit was the first to recover from the stranger's explosive entrance. "My, but you are a klutz, aren't you?" "I am not, I'm a sea otter," said the otter, for indeed that's what he was. "I just haven't got my land legs yet." Disentangling himself with the help of the Cafe servobots, he finally stood and waved generally at everyone in the room. "Hi, my name is Dana!" (pronouced DAY-na) "Yippee!" said the Enduring Man-Child, "I've always said there should be more mustelids in fan fiction! Can I hug you?" Ronnie had suffered such an attack before, and warned the newcomer, "I wouldn't advise it," But Dana just threw open his forepaws and said, "Sure! I'm friendly . .OOF! Yah, ease up there, let the blood flow, thanks." "Wow, soft!" said the Enduring Man-Child in admiration. "Thank you," said Dana "Of course, that's why there aren't more of us. Bad people used to hunt us for our fur." "That's terrible," said CD. Even Raven Warhammer agreed that was a shameful thing for people to do. "So where's Loki at?" drawled SomeGhol. "He's still five days out of home-port, and said he'd be along as soon as he could, but he sent me on ahead to introduce myself." Something seemed to strike just then, and he snapped one of his forepaws. "Oh, who's Winston?" Winston looked up from the device he was compiling which was now emitting a rather sickly glow and waved. "Loki said for me to tell you that you should try reversing the polarity of the neutron flow on that thing before you accidentally vaporize the cafe." Winston frowned and regarded the device. "Hmmm, that might just do the trick. I was getting kinda worried about the glow. I guess you do learn useful things in the Navy after all." "So," said Dana, rubbing his forepaws together in anticipation, "can I get some urchins and a kelp salad here or what?" ----------------------------------------------- "Does Pete's insurance cover being eaten?" Dale wanted to know. "How should I know?" Chip wanted to know. Administering a bonk to Dale's head he continued, "Don't just head straight for it, take evasive action or something!" "I'm not flying," Dale answered, "the computer is on autopilot!" Chip smacked his forehead in exasperation. "Computer! Take evasive action!" "Evasive action not possible," the computer replied calmly, "guidance control system failure due to external energy field." "Well give me full manual control then!" "Okay," the computer replied. Suddenly the smooth panels in the control room slid aside, and a profusion of levers, buttons, knobs, switches, dials and instruments of every size and description sprang from every surface, crowding the Chipmunks back innto their seats. "Is there a manual for this stuff?" Dale asked. "Where did you get your pilot's license, off a box of Crunchy Wunchies?" Chip retorted. He would have bonked Dale, but there was a forest of control levers in the way. "YI-I-I-I-I-I-I!!" the Chipmunks yelled as the maw drew ever closer, and destruction, or at least ingestion, seemed all but certain. -------------------------------------------------------- Karl (Registered User) Meanwhile, back at the coffeehouse... A somewhat ratty-looking rat edged in past the unspeakable evil half-blocking the doorway. It took no notice - in fact, it lay there in a sort of catatonic stupor. "I hope you don't mind? I duct-taped a service manual for a Harris Sigma Plus + UHF transmitter over that thing's eyes." The rat shuddered, "It seems to have the same effect on that... thing, as it has always had on me." "You don't expect us to believe Ultimate Evil is that easy to overcome?" the Enduring Man-child muttered into his cup. "Oh, not at all! After a few minutes of trying to make sense of that wretched manual, I usually fly into a blind rage and..." The monstrous evil screamed! "Oh dear." Qouth Attic Rat. ------------------------------------------------- SomeGhol (Registered User) SomeGhol knocked back another hotchocholate And then turned to Dana. "So, you're a sea otter huh?" Dana looked at the scruffy fellow sitting next to him at the bar, wondering if there was any point in responding since it was obvious that the guy hadn't listened to his introduction. In the end, the eerie silence, which permeated the Coffee house, compelled him to reply. "Yes, I am indeed a Sea Otter." "Don't remember one of those before." SomeGhol muttered into his now empty mug. "Excuse me?" The on-again-off-again writer looked up in surprise, "Oh, nothing." he said quickly. "So, when did Loki meet up with you? I don't recall there being Otters in the Met." Dana frowned, "Well, that's a question probably best left to him. I'm sure he'll fill you all in on the details when he arrives. I just hope he can make it through the snowstorm." "Yeah, it's gettin pretty rough out there, and it was plenty bad when I showed up." SomeGhol paused for a moment to think, a rare and terrifying occurrence to any who knew him. "You know what it reminds me of? It reminds me of a scene from "Fly to The Light"." "Wow! it's covered up the unspeakable evil that's blocking the door!" Someone, it sounded like CD, shouted from one of the front windows. Dana snorted. "Some Unspeakable Evil. It was defeated by a wooden door!" "Well, there's been worse." stated Winston as he joined the Otter, and the Vagabond at the bar. "Name one." The Otter was not about to be contradicted by someone who had nearly shorted the lights out just alittle while earlier. "Uh... uhm." Winston looked to SomeGhol for help, but the ignorant Tennessee’en could only shrug in blissful ignorance. "Um, Gargamel?" Winston finally offered. Dana blinked, then nodded. "Well, that's right. That fellow really was pathetic." "At least he didn't let himself get covered with snow." "Speaking of which." said SomeGhol as he moved around behind the bar to find some more chocolate mix, "If that doesn't calm down soon we're libel to get stuck here." he searched and searched, but couldn't find any little packets of joy. Winston grinned. "Well, if it does happen, at least we have a lot of chocolate to keep us warm." his grin faded as SomeGhol came up empty handed. "Or not?" "It's all gone." "All of it?" "Every last pack." Dana was shocked. "But there must have been two whole boxes of it just thirty miniuts ago! Who could have drunk it all in that short of time?" he paused as he noticed Winston and SomeGhol glaring at something across the room. He followed their gaze, and found his eyes led to a very guilty looking Chipmunk. "Uh, sorry?" Dale gulped audibly as he tried desperately to flick the last flecks of powdered coco from his lips and face. SomeGhol looked at the device that had been giving Winston so much grief. "That thing work?" "More likely to explode if I turn it on." replied the other Rangerphile, grinning as he tossed it from hand to hand like a grenade. "Excellent," SomeGhol smiled, took a deep breath, and shouted at the top of his lungs. "GET THAT MUNK!" just as he vaulted over the bar. "EEP!" was about the only comment that Dale made as he scrambled away from his rampaging fans. Chip might have helped his best friend, had he not been rolling on the floor laughing. The Chase was on... ______________________________________________________________________ Meanwhile, the great behemoth, having had its fill of fairy-tale fare, crossed over the horizon of Dragon planate into a land of eternal darkness; a land in which all creative effort was sucked into, and as in the event horizon of a black hole, crushed with no hope of escape. The door to the gargantuan white office building which dominated the bleak, lava filled landscape was one that struck terror into the hearts of good, fun loving people across all the lands. The monster swooped down, and knocked politely on the front offices of Disney Legal. -------------------------------------------------- Winston (Registered User) After the ensuing chaos... "Aww, c'mon guys, I've learned my lesson!" Dale called from the corner, struggling against the ropes that he had been tied to a chair with. "Untie me, wouldja?" "Sorry Dale, you should have had more self-control." SomeGhol shrugged. Chip said nothing, he was still chuckling at his friend's plight. Indy looked around the Coffeehouse in alarm, surveying the overturned tables and chairs lying everywhere after the wild chase. "Okay, the excitement's over, time to clean up the mess." He said sternly, glaring at Winston and SomeGhol, who had been the two most responsible for the commotion. "Yeah, he's right. We did a number on this place." Winston commented, righting a table and pulling it back into it's proper place, then pushing in the chairs that went with it. "Lucky nothing broke." "Aww, it's not luck..." Gadget's voice suddenly called from the front door as she walked in, followed by Monty and Zipper. "Everything here's made of superstrong materials. And it looks like it's a good thing, too... what happened here?" Gadget asked, looking around the trashed room and peering quizzically at Dale tied up in the corner. "Looks like there was a real scuffle, it does." Monty commented. "We had some trouble with hot chocolate." SomeGhol said vaguely. "How does hot chocolate... hmm, maybe it's better NOT to know..." Gadget wondered. "So where have you guys been, anyway?" Ronnie Rabbit asked. "This blizzard held us up." Gadget explained. "It's really hard to navigate in weather like this." She and Monty took off their coats and hung them up. After all the tables and chairs were back in their rightful places, Winston was fiddling with his experimental device once again. "Gadget, you said this place is made of really strong materials, right? Could the walls stop, say, something with the force of about a .50 caliber bullet without being damaged?" he asked. "Oh, easily." She said without thinking, and then a suspicious look crossed her face as she inspected Winston's device, curious why he'd asked. She put her hands on her hips and glared sternly, obviously not pleased. "You're building a railgun?" she asked. Winston thought for a moment about how to put a positive spin on his response. "Well... a magnetic mass driver, yeah." Winston answered sheepishly at last, not thinking of much. "Don't you realize how dangerous those are?" Gadget scolded. "What if the rails fly apart on you?" "I know the risks, yes... but I also know what I'm doing." Winston said. "Besides, I've got all the problems worked out, and it's ready to testfire for the first time. Nothing's going to fly apart, I've got it all secured together way above spec for the amount of electrical current I'm going to be putting through it." He insisted. "Hmm... I guess one firing couldn't hurt..." Gadget pondered. "Excellent." Winston grinned, flipping a switch. The sound of capacitors charging up hummed faintly in the air with a high pitch. He dropped a small piece of metal between the copper rails of his device. "Here goes..." With the flip of a second switch, a shower of sparks three feet high and blindingly bright momentarily shot out of the machine with a sharp cracking sound. In an instant, it was over, the capacitor bank having discharged it's energy. The room was utterly silent for a moment. "So where's the projectile?" Gadget asked, breaking the silence as she looked around on the floor. "Still in the machine." Winston said, puzzled, peering inside. "It didn't overcome friction fast enough. The heat from the electric arc welded the rails together. I guess that's the end of that." Winston shrugged. "I thought for sure it would work... Oh well, back to the drawing board, as they say. Maybe some sort of high-temperature superconducter would... nah, that's a project for some other time." ******************************** Shortly after the dark creature knocked, a guard opened the door to the white building. "Name and your business here?" The guard asked, sounding bored. "My name is not your concern," the dark behemoth growled, "and I'm here to apply for a job." "Job applicant? Oh, well come on in, then." The guard said, throwing the door open wider. ---------------------------------------------------------------- Ronnie Rabbit (Registered User) Rabbit Tracks Ronnie suddenly realized he'd actually SAID something to Gadget, and had been so flustered by the day's events he hadn't even realized it. ( This is my chance! ) He thought, excited. ( She's heeeere! I'll go over and tell her what a wonderful person I think she is, and thank her for being Gadget, and all of those things! Yes! ) Gathering his tiny body's tiny courage, the orange rabbit composed himself, strode purposefully forward, and promptly fell into the still-open rabbit hole he'd used to enter the story five posts ago. Gadget glanced around, certain she'd heard something that sounded vaguely like "Ow.", then shrugged... must have been her imagination. ***** Crusher and Geordi do absolutely nothing during this post. ***** "As it happens," the employment agent told the roiling mass of black fumes that had been ushered into her office, "We ARE looking for various evil entities to take care of some problems for us. The usual- harass small schools and churches that are painting pictures of Mickey on the walls- eating mail we get pleading for DVD releases of old shows- that sort of thing. What are your qualifications, precisely?" The billowing cloud of darkness gathered itself into a foul, cohesive mass of utter depravity, leveled a baleful red eye at her, and intoned, "I am... ANGST." "I have just the job for you," the agent affirmed, beaming. Her eyes settled on the opening that had been handed to her just moments before, about a problem that needed taking care of at some place called the Acorn Cafe. ------------------------------------------------------ Chip Chap (Unregistered User) the dynamic duo delivery service Pete leaned back in his chair and puffed lightly on the cigar he held in his mouth. He glanced impatiently at the door to his office and scowled unpleasantly. "Where are those two? If those rodents don't hurry up and get over here I'll have to start hiring moogles." His thoughts were interrupted by a scratching sound emanating from the base of his office door, followed by a bonking sound and a series of high-pitched chipmunk chatter. The anthropomorphized cat couldn't help but chuckle at what was probably happening outside his office. The doorknob suddenly turned and the door swung open, allowing the two chipmunks to enter the office and climb on top of the cluttered desk. "You called, Sir?" the two employees asked simultaneously. "About time you guys got here." Pete grumbled as he pulled out a stack of papers from a desk drawer and thumbed through them. "I've got a job for you two. Baloo called up sick, evidently he got something called the General Tsu's Chicken Pox, and he can't fly the Gummi Ship so I need you two goofballs to pilot the Gummi Ship Boobyprize and make sure these items are delivered properly. "Wowie Zowie! Ya mean we get to fly the spaceship?" Dale asked energetically. "Darn right! And you'd better not crash it or do anything stupid, if you two guys do ANYTHING to raise my insurance, I'm taking it out of your pay!" "I doubt that." Chip said sarcastically, "Considering that you pay us about two bucks work of peanuts a week, you really can't take that much out." The serious chipmunk shook his head as he read the inventory they would be carrying "Two thousand bags of charcoal and a copy of 102 Dalmatians to be delivered to Hades." He flipped to the next delivery. "A hundred cutlasses, twenty bandannas, set of gold plated novelty hooks, and a can of crocodile repellent to be delivered to Never Neverland." He turned to the next page. "Four hundred chairs, a hundred tables, seventy five cabinets, eighty sets of dinnerware, twelve clocks, ten bath tubs, a dozen toilets, a stove, a couch, five hundred feather dusters and a bottle of mega-monster mixture to be delivered to..." he flipped the page over "a formerly enchanted castle located in France." The serious minded chipmunk looked up at his employer accusingly. "You saved up all the weirdoes for us, didn't you?" "Hey, you two either delivers those items or you can kiss those lifetime space taxi privileges of yours goodbye." "Hey Chip, the guys at the Acorn Cafe ordered twenty pizzas, ten gallons of ice cream, five buckets of candy, three barrels of assorted party favorites, a dozen bottles of WD-40 and a jumbo-sized cake." Dale looked up from the papers in front of him, "Do you think there's going to be a party?" Chip double checked the list, "Looks like it, and if the guys at the Cafe are having a party then..." "Gadget will be there!" the two chipmunks said together. "Hey Pete, can we stop off at the Cafe?" "Sure, if you get that other stuff delivered first." Pete waived them off. "Now get outta here I got work to do." The two chipmunks ran out of the office determined to get their jobs done and get their delivery to the guys at the Cafe. ----------------------------------------------------- The Enduring Man-Child (Registered User) Somebody's knockin' at the do'. "Who could that be?" Man-Child wondered, though he welcomed the opportunity to get as far away from Winston's dangerous-looking work as he could (without looking like he was running away). Imagine his surprise when at the door he found (conveniently and appropriately re-sized) none other but Chip and Dale themselves! "Okay, who ordered pizza?" Chip wanted to know. "Not I," Man-Child said, "I don't even eat pizza. Was it you, Winston?" "Nope," Winston answered, though his attention was fully focused on wiring the frillbiz into the frammis of his ploomflangle. "That's weird," Chip said. "Hey, maybe Eugene ordered it!" Man-Child suggested. At the mention of his name Eugene suddenly appeared in the air before Chip and Dale, much to their momentary alarm. "Did you order the pizza, boy?" Man-Child asked. Eugene "Jeep"ed and shook his head to indicate no, but immediately devoured the pizzas anyway. "So who's gonna pay us?" Dale asked. Man-Child quickly changed the subject. "So what are you guys doing delivering pizzas anyway? You appear to be the Chip and Dale from "Rescue Rangers" rather than the classic version. "Oh . . . Toon Disney duty," Chip said, wiping his forehead with a handerkerchief. We're helping out in the main office of all the Disney toons two days a week. No big deal, really. We all take turns and today was our day." "That's nice," Man-Child said. "But the question is . . . " Chip begain. "Where's our money?" Dale asked. Chip rewarded him with a bonk. "Mind your manners, dummy," he said. "And I was going to say the question is who ordered the pizzas if you guys are the only people here and none of you did it." "Hey, maybe it's someone who's on his way here at this minute!" Man-Child suggested, "Maybe there's gonna be a Rangerphile or toon character party, and we're just in time to get in on it! And maybe we'll have another adventure!" "Yeah, and now the pizzas are all gone," Dale pointed out, still rubbing his head. Even Chip had to agree that Eugene's gaffe could prove embarrassing. "Not to worry!" Man-Child said, "Eugene is a magical Jeep (quite unlike bats which aren't magical or supernatural or sinister in the slightest), and I'm sure he can do something to help you!" He turned to Eugene in anticipation. "Jeep! Jeep!" And with a snap of his fingers Eugene produced twice the number of pizzas he had eaten. "Wow! What a neat trick! More tips for us!" Dale enthused. Chip bonked him again. Suddenly Eugene began to act very strangely. Every strand of hair stood up straight (assuming he has hair) and he began growling and hissing defensively. "Does that mean some Evil Presence is nearby?" Chip asked. "Goodness . . . I hope not," Man-Child said, "but even if it is, maybe it's only Brutus. Is that who it is, boy? Is Brutus coming?" Eugene shook his head emphatically. "The Sea Hag?" The same reaction. "Well . . . maybe something -is- stirring somewhere amongst the worlds," Man-Child reluctantly admitted. Chip and Dale looked at one another. This did not look good! ----------------------------------------------------- Chip Chap (Registered User) Two unwanted guests Suddenly the room began to shake as if the very foundation of their world was coming apart. "What's happening?!" Dale yelled as the tables began to rattle and move across the room. "I don't know." Man-child said trying to act calm, but it doesn't look good. A loud blood-curdling howl sounded outside the entrance to the cafe. It was the sound of a predator that, having tracked down it's quarry, was closing in for the kill. The two chipmunks obeyed their instincts that thousands of years of evolution had granted them and froze statue-like to avoid detection. "Huh?" Winston glanced up from his machine and noticed that everyone was staring in fear at whatever lurked beyond the door. "Hmmm... it's probably just a Balrog that decided to stop by for a drink." he said and calmly peeked outside the door. After a quick glance he noticed what was outside and immediately slammed the door. "OHMYGODITSHIDEOUS!!!" Winston screamed and began boarding up the door with lightning speed. "Wha...wha...what is it?!" Man-child asked as he looked for something to jam the door with. "Evilevilevil!!" was the only reply Winston could vocalize. Until a loud explosion sounded outside. "We've got to get out of here...fast!" Eugene beeped worriedly as a metallic arm tore through the Cafe's door like tissue paper, revealing the fiery inferno outside. Chip and Dale were jolted out of their immobile state at the sight before them. "Oh my god it's... THEM!" Chip screamed, completely forgetting to be the leader of the situation. "Who are they?!" Man-child yelled more out of fear than expecting a response. "A being of evil beyond anything mortal man dare observe." Winston shouted as he desperately began to adjust the device he had been constructing. "A creature so foul that Hades shirks from it's path, a monster so despicable that it makes Sephiroth look like a friendly boy scout, a beast so depraved and twisted that it makes the characterization in Indy's "Daring to Dream" look perfectly normal!" Dale looked at Winston curiously "I thought Indy did a great job with that story." Suddenly Winston’s machine hummed to life, lights began to flash and with sudden burst of light a shimmering portal opened up in the air. “Hey, that not supposed to happen.” Winston looked at the mysterious opening as it immediately coughed out a chipmunk who apparently liked wearing extra-long sleeved jackets. Their fashion-blind visitor promptly stood up, dusted himself off, and began reading from a card that he pulled out from one of his pockets. "Actually “Daring to Dream” was perfectly acceptable until Indy decided to give Dale a secret lair. That forced the reader to believe that Dale, an expressive and fun-loving individual who already watches TV, reads comic books, sits around eating, listens to rock music, and plays video games still has enough time on his hands to secretly fence, paint, make costumes, and hollow out a couple rooms out of a tree over a period of at least a few months without alerting the four other occupants and the countless other park residents of his activities.” The speaker took a deep breath and continued on. “While it is admirable that he wrote a story in which Dale was able to win Gadget’s heart, Indy’s method of doing so leaves much to be desired. The unexplained intrusion of Baloo the bear, Henry Higgins, Gaston, the transformers, Charlie Brown, Robin Hood, Maid Marian...” Chip shook himself awake and grabbed the intruder by the collar. “Okay, who the heck are you and what are you doing here.” Chip’s prisoner only kept reading through the speech on his card, although he showed definite sighs of worry. “...and Darth Vader only serve to disillusion the reader to any pretense of there being an actual plot to the story. Chip’s resulting nervous breakdown and unusually violent behavior as a result of this ridiculous display of incompetence on behalf of...” “I said WHO ARE YOU!” Chip yelled as he yanked the card from the speakers grasp. He looked his prisoner straight in the eye. “I...I...my name is Enaye...and...let go of me!” Enaye immediately shoved himself free and made a grab for his card. “Hey, this guy is Chip Chap’s avatar.” Man-Child observed. “Who’s Chip Chap?” Dale asked innocently. “Some Newbie at the Cafe.” Winston offered as he tried to make out what was on the other end of the portal. “So far he wrote one fan-fic, and I think the deleted scenes were probably the best parts of it.” “Why would send an avatar to tell us his lousy opinions about somebody else’s story.” Chip asked as he ripped up the card so that Enaye couldn’t bug anyone with his master’s message. “Probably so that if he ever talked to you it wouldn’t turn into an Abbot and Costello Comedy routine.” Man-Child offered. “Anyway I think we could actually use this guy.” “How’s that?” “Well, his stupid blabbering just bored that monster to death.” Man-child said pointing to the hideous beast that lay unconscious on the Cafe floor. “Jeep! Jeep!” Eugene honked at the others as he sped through the portal. “Hey Eugene get back here!” Man-Child yelled as he followed the strange creature through the portal. “ARRRGHHH!” the beast immediately rose to it’s feet revealed a set of wicked looking nano-injectors on its hands. “What is that thing?” Dale asked as he backed away from it. Ring! Ring! Ring! Everyone glanced at Enaye as he pulled a cellular phone out of his pocket and put it to his ear. “Oh yeah... really... uh oh... sounds painful... okay I’ll tell them.” Enaye hung up the phone and turned to Chip. “It’s a borgified Michael Eisner. It plans to assimilate the Cafe and turn it into the Eisner Saloon.” Everyone (except Michael Eisner and Enaye) looked at one another with concern, then they looked at Eisner, and looked at each other again. “AAAAHHHHHHH!!!” They all yelled. “Don’t worry.” Enaye said, calming everyone down. “This portal connects to a different plot sequence, one that my stupid author more-or-less started. We should all be more or less safe there.” Everyone (except Michael Eisner and Enaye) looked at one another with concern, then they looked at Enaye, and looked at each other again. “AAAAHHHHHHH!!!” They all yelled. “Hey, either walk through the portal and be faced with the imagination of a lousy fanfic author, or stay here and become the Michael Eisnerteers.” Winston, Chip and Dale immediately ran through the portal. “Okay, I guess that takes care of that.” Enaye immediately turns to the reader, “If you want to add to this story (which I would really appreciate) , put it after Loki crossing the Atlantic’s “Banzai!”.” The avatar quickly shut off the machine and leapt through the portal as the fabric of space quickly sealed itself, thereby preventing the Eisner-Borg from following the others. However he managed to put in a few parting words “Oh, and by the way Indy. I really did like your story...” ----------------------------------------------------- CD (Registered User) Somewhere, in a dimensional vortex not to far from fiction The entire group had reached what appeared to be the other side of the portal. Which was simply black, everywhere you looked. Even through the blackness all Rangers and Rangerphiles were able to see each other clearly. "Well, doesn't look to bad." Steve noted as he looked around. "Please remember that the owner of this reality can change our surroundings at any time he wants." CD warned, knowing the power of fanfiction. "Well, until now the worst thing I've seen is you drooling over a picture of Clarice so I feel like I can take on the whole world." Gus reasoned. ---------- Meanwhile, the army of Evil Eisner had attempted a second attack at the Coffeehouse but they were faced with the Ultimate Horror (tm). "Boss, that looks like the old you combined with machinery." The Lab Assistant noted. "It's horrible! What are we going to do?" The Eisner Brain screamed and shook in it's tank. "How about giving the command to 'fire at will'?" Mickey suggested. "Ow, allright. OPEN FIRE!" The Brain commanded and the soldier rushed the Borg creature. "Would you two mind explaining me what you did with my body?" Eisner's Brain demanded. "Well boss, we gave it to a strange group that called itself the Borg. They seemed interested in assembling human bodies." The Lab Assistant explained. "WHAT!?" "You heard her, we gave it to the Borg." Marshall Mickey repeated. ---------- What will happen to the dimensional travelers. And who will win the fight between Eisner's Brain's army and the Borg Eisner? That depends on the next one to write. Good day and never donate your body to cyborgs you never saw before. ------------------------------------------------------------------ Indy (MB Admin) Meanwhile, across the galaxy... On the largely-unknown-until-recently planet Knokoffo, Widgo Fett was overseeing the production of an army of genetic knockoffs of herself. Annoyed, she snapped a question to the lead knockoffer. "Why don't they look like me!" Widgo said. "They look like that goody-two shoes, Gadge (pronouced Gadgey) Rambalona!" The lead knockoffer, a two-headed snake--well, you knew they had to come from somewhere--hissed in frustration. "Well, you sssshould have ssspecified, your excellency. Bessssides, we are all Gadgephilessss on Knokoffo. Gadge is one of the most popular knockoff charactersssss in the universe. She keepssss us in businessss." On the planet Coriscant, an aging Jedi Master groaned as he felt a disturbance in the Force. "The dark side I sense," Yoda said, addressing the Jedi Council. "A parody there is of events in our reality. Much danger from this I sense. Into this alternate reality I must go, and determine the source of the problem, I will." Back in the alternate reality in question, on the planet Boohoo, Gadge Rambalona was taking a walk with a young Jedi chipmunk(okay, I'm not parodying everything and apologies to Chipper) named Acumen Whybother. Gadge found she liked Acumen, but something was much more pressing on her mind. "Acumen, how does that light saber of yours work? It's been my experience that a coherent energy field is difficult to contain like that." "Oh, not that again!" Acumen shouted. "I want you to listen to my problems, like how Ol' Wannabe Charlie never listens to me!" "That's because he's always near cheese whenever you try talking to him," Gadge said. "I hear it runs in his family. But now we must hie ourselves to the Dragon Planet, for I sense through some strange plot device that we must go there." "The Dragon Planet? Where's that?" Acumen asked. "We don't really need to know," Gadge said. "We'll conveniently appear there. Well, okay not conveniently but through the writer's desire to skip unneeded exposition. Not that all exposition is unneeded--in fact, used well it can explain quite a lot without--" "Uh, Gadge? Let's just get in a spaceship and get going." Indy appeared at the Coffeehouse, his trademark fedora casting a fine shadow on the opposite wall. He ordered a latte and settled in just in time to hear Chip say, "I don't care if it takes like cardboard! You still owe us $7.50 on the tip!" ------------------------------------------------------------------ Loki crossing the Atlantic (Unregistered User) And just then, reality shattered, leaving everyone floating in a space that was more or less not exactly pink . . . "Now you've done it," said Gadget. "Done what?" asked one of the authors, or maybe one of their creations. "The fabric of local reality has been shattered," Gadget said, trying to figure out which way was up. "You clowns tried to cram too many separate and disparate ideas into the story framework, and it burst." "So which reality is this?" asked Chip, in an effort to figure out just how he was supposed to feel about Gadget now. "None of them, that's the problem," Gadget answered. She twisted around in an effort to orient herself, then gave up the idea and pulled out a pad of paper, upon which she wrote a horrendously complicated equation in magic marker that she showed to the others. "You see? We've been suspended outside the entirety of the fanfic space-time continuum." "I see a lot of squiggly things," remarked Dana, "but none of them explain why we're all floating in a space that is almost, but not quite, entirely pink." "Jeep," added Eugene in agreement. "How do we fix this thing?" asked Dale, trying to swim in nothingness in an effort to find a comfortable position as far as he could get from Michael Eisner's disembodied brain. "This just isn't fair!" cried the ultimate evil. "Here I was about to receive gainful employment and everything, and now I find myself floating in a giant cotton candy. Whoever wrote this mess, you just wait until I get myself a good lawyer!" "Put a sock in it," suggested Karl, "There's got to be some way out of this mess. It requires only a little imagination to set things right again." "Has anyone else had any visions lately?" asked the Enduring Man-Child. The succession of blank stares he received in reply led him to conclude that no one else knew what he was even talking about. "You mean like Mrs. Brisby?" asked Dana, catching on. For all his lack of education, Dana was exceptionally bright. The Enduring Man-Child began to wonder if the task of writing them out of this increasingly bizzarre situation was going to fall to him again. "If my mass driver hadn't fused itself into slag," Winston mused, "I might be able to use Newton's third law to propel us about." "I have a sneaking suspiscion that the laws of physics, as we understand them in the physical world, don't really apply here." Gadget looked around for something, anything for inspiration. "I'm getting airsick," said Dana. "We're stuck in what I can only guess is a striation, a crevice between realities," said Gadget. "Somehow, we've got to get back to the Dragon Planet. It has no fixed point of reference, so it's probably the easiest place to get to from an interdimensional rift. But I have to confess that I'm fresh out of ideas at this point. Well, not out of all ideas, I have a few ideas about some things, but they really don't have anything to do with our current predicament." The phalanx of blank stares that greeted Gadget's discourse did little to reassure her. "Oh for cryin' in a bucket." "Now what?" asked Dale. "That does it," said Michael Eisner's brain. "I'm suing." ---------------------------------------------------------- The Enduring Man-Child (Registered User) Um . . . er . . . um . . . er . . . Man-Child held tightly onto Eugene with one hand and to Dana (who was wonderfully soft and smooth!) with the other, his eyes shut tight and his brain on overdrive. "Are we in the portal or back in the Coffeehouse?" he wanted to know, "and are Chip 'n' Dale here with us or on the Gummi Ship, seeing as how they were here with us one minute and piloting the Gummi Ship the next! What's going on here???" "You are in the Great Void of Infinite Possibilities, my son," came a familar voice. Man-Child opened his eyes, which shone with unutterable love as he beheld his very own personal Furry Toon Mother, Mrs. Jonathan Brisby! "Oh, I am so glad to see you!" he said, dropping both Eugene (who floated) and Dana (who didn't) to hug his great Protectress. "I'm so confused! First we were in the Coffeehouse, then this Ultimate Evil thing was really throwing down, then Chip 'n' Dale showed up, then CD and his gang came in, and there was a portal, and we went in it, only we didn't, and Chip 'n' Dale were back on board the Gummi Ship, and . . . " "There there, my son!" she spoke calmingly to him. "You said no strings attached, remember?" "Yeah, but--" "Then one must be prepared for multiple storylines, not all of them fitting together. Is this not true?" she asked. "Yea, verily, yea," Man-Child saith. "But fear not," she said, "for I have a feeling that ::ahem!:: SOMEONE out there who is partially responsible for this mess will explain it all in such a way as to bring all the strands back together." "Oh Mrs. Brisby, are you sure?" he asked. "No." "Oh." "But be that as it may," she said as her body began to glow and effervesce into toony nothingness, "at least you are momentarily safe from Michael Eisner, the most evil entity in all the worlds. Beware him, my child! Beware! Beware! Beware!! BEWARE!!!!!" And suddenly she was gone. "Who . . . who was that?" asked Dana. "It was . . . her!" Man-Child answered. No other explanation was necessary. "Now I am ready to die in peace!" said Dana, his eyes shining just as Man-Child's were. Meanwhile, Eugene "Jeep"ed and drew their attention to the same portal they had just gone through. On one side was darkness, on the other, Michael Eisner. What a dilemma! "Now what do we do?" asked Dana. "We keep asking questions until they tell us the truth," answered Fox. "Oh shut up," Dana said. ----------------------------------------------- Chip Chap (Registered User) Enaye tries again As Man-Child, Eugene, Dana, fox, and whoever else had somehow gotten trapped between worlds huddled together. Chip and Enaye ran up to meet them. Enaye: What are you guys standing around here for? You're supposed to be in the thread right after Loki's Banzai story! Chip: What are you talking about? For that matter, who the heck are you? Dana: And why did we suddenly switch to script format. Enaye: Right now we don't seem to be anywhere, but I'll try to explain things later on. As for who I am, I am the Messanger of the Author. Man-Child: The Messanger of the Author? Enaye: Yup. I'm just a character who deliveres messages from the author to the fictional world. Chip(slowly backing away from Enaye): You mean you're a Mary Sue character? Enaye: Sort of, my only Mary Sue powers are my ability to show up and vanish for no logcal reason and my ability to carry messeges from the author. I have absolutly no desire to either marry Gadget, become a Rescue Ranger, or steal the show, although later on I might serve as a hit man to eliminate characters that the author hates. Man-Child: So you basically are a Mary Sue that doesn't pretend to do things of your own free will? You're a perfectly decent character that carries out the orders of the author? Enaye: Pretty much. Chip: Then what are you doing in this story?! Enaye: When Man-Child first started the story thread, my master Chip Chap wrote "The Dynamic Duo's Delivery Service" to create a sort of Kingdom Hearts Crossover that would give everyone a much wider range of worlds to put in the story. However, at that same moment Winston wrote the story "A few moments later..." this created a split in the storyline that made everything confusing. In order to fix this problem, my master wrote "two unwanted guests" on the thread that followed his origional story. He then sent the Eisner Borg and me to destroy his storyline world and transport you guys to the other stoyline so that there would only be one linear plot. Man-Child: Soooo... Chip Chap put everything off to a bad start so that nothing makes sense, and now he sent you (a character so pathetic that almost nobody replies to a message you deliver and nobody tries writing you into a "no stings attached" coffehouse thread) to patch things together? Enaye: Thats pretty much how it works. Dana: So what do we do now? Enaye: Well, all I have to do is reach over here and... Enaye reaches over to a perfectly empty section of air and pushes it slightly, causing it to swing outward like a door. Enaye: ...walk right in. The group follow him inside where they find themselves back in the perfectly restored Acorn Cafe with Winston, SomeGohl, and Dale inside. SomeGhol: Hi guys, what took you so long? Chip: Don't ask. Enaye: Now, I think that covers most of everything. Winston: What about all the Eisners that are hanging around here? SomeGhol: And the weird monster thats flying around in parts unknown. Chip and Dale: And the fact that we are still flying that gummi ship delivering all that junk Pete dumped on us. Enaye: How should I know?! You think I'm made of answers?! Suddenly a loud ringing noise is heard from Enaye's pocket. Enaye: Well, looks like my master does. Enay pulls out his cell phone and listens for a few moments befor hanging up. Enaye: Okay then, both the Eisners are stuck in the destroyed Cafe and will never be heard from again. Everyone: Horay!! Enaye: Unless somebody really wants them in the story, in which case they walk in through this door that I left wide open. Everyone: Doh!! Enaye: The evil monster was really Batmunk from "I dream of a new Ranger" and he's coming here to meet Dale and be friends with everyone. Everyone: Horay!! Dale: Isn't the Batmunk copyright The J.A.M.? Enay: Mind your own business! Chip and Dale are still flying their ship but will soon get sucked into a wormhole that sends them far enough back into the past so that they will get all their deliveries made in time to get here to the Cafe. Everyone: Horay!! Man-Child: What about the fact that the new posts on the stoyboard are slowly pushing us down the list until nobody can find us anymore? Enaye:........why don't you start a sequel to this thread. Everyone: Urrrrrr. Dale: Hey, Enaye where do you get that weird name? Enaye: Well since I'm technicaly not an actual character per se, Chip Chap named me N.A. for non applicable. You know like if I'm filling out a form and it asks my name than I just write down N.A.. Man-Child: Well, I guess the plot is more or less united now. Enaye: Yeah. Oh and by the way, if anybody wants to use me as a character in this or any other story that isn't supposed to make sense its alright. Just remember that I can do anything as long as its to either introduce or remove me from the story, when I voice a message from the author then I either hear it off the phone or have a pretyped letter. Other than that, do whatever you want. Chip: Well let's see what happens next... ------------------------------------------------------------