In Name Only Part 6 Entering the study, Natalie saw the anxious face of her brother and the seemingly indifferent countenance of Joshua Collins turned in her direction. She took a deep breath, knowing one would hear her news with great disappointment while the other would be overjoyed with her decision. There was nothing to be gained by postponing her announcement any longer. "Natalie? What have you decided?" "Be assured, Andre, I have given this matter a great deal of serious thought. I have examined all sides of the situation, contemplated the results of answering either way and have had little else on my mind for days." "Yes, yes, and what have you decided?" Natalie's gaze met Joshua's for a brief instant. Had she heard impatience in his voice, or was his tone that of a man anxious to know what role she would play in his future? The tarot cards had been no help to her in answering this question, leaving Natalie to follow her own good sense. "I have decided..." Natalie glanced at her brother, wishing she did not have to do this to him, but was unable to make any other decision. "I have decided that yes, I will marry Joshua Collins." What? No! That was not her decision! She had decided not to marry Joshua, that even as simply a business arrangement, with no other expectations or responsibilities involved, she could not be tied to that man for the rest of her life. Natalie did not hear the responses of the men, so great was her own confusion. Andre was overjoyed, grateful his sister was willing to sacrifice for him, pleased to see this uncharacteristic unselfishness on her part, to assure the continuance of the family fortune. Joshua was more reserved, accepting her decision with a stoic calmness that gave away nothing of his true feelings, but as he turned away to pour them each a drink of celebration, Natalie was certain she saw him smile with delight. Why? He was no more anxious to marry her than she was to wed him. Why had she said yes?!! Natalie accepted the drink from Joshua and only distantly listened while her brother proposed a toast. Why had she said yes? Her decision had been no, she was prepared to tell them both no. It had not been an impulse that caused her to say yes, nor was it a basic carnal desire to see her dreams enacted. Yet she had said yes. Why? "Natalie... Natalie.." Pulling herself back to the conversation, Natalie blinked and looked at her brother as he laid a hand on her shoulder. "Yes?" "Are you all right, Natalie? Your gaze was troubled and distant." "As a matter of fact, Andre,... I was wondering how quickly we could arrange the ceremony. I should like to be married as soon as possible." NO! Why was she saying these things? She did not want to marry Joshua, and certainly not immediately. None of this made any sense! Despite the lack of a telltale mark on her hand, Natalie was nearly convinced she was somehow being influenced by the spell of a witch - by Angelique. But why? She had not approved of Angelique's marriage to Barnabas, but she had certainly not opposed it. Nearly ready to call in Reverend Trask, Natalie remembered he had disappeared quite suddenly. Who then; who could help her understand why she was saying things the exact opposite of what she wanted to say? Once again she was pulled back to the immediate conversation by Joshua's words. "...quietly and tastefully, without the need of extravagance, I believe we can accomplish the marriage and sign the final contract with a week. Will that give you adequate time to prepare, Natalie?" "Yes, that will be most acceptable, Joshua." Natalie smiled, but did not believe her own words. How could this be? She glanced at Joshua, who gave her a brief smile and nod of acceptance, then looked at Andre who was asking if she would allow him to negotiate the marriage contract for her. Natalie agreed, her mind suddenly on wedding plans. None of it made any sense. |
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