[Peter's Condo]
Peter and Lexi are lying together uncomfortably on a patio lounge chair, Peter in his robe and Lexi in an oversized shirt, her long legs dangling from the shirt tails. Peter comments, "We've been sleeping together for almost a month now, and I don't even know, are you a breakfast person..." "Un-uh" Lexi grunts. "I'm not even a morning person." Who cares, with the flimsy thing she's wearing, I'm busy moving my head to and fro trying to find out if she's a thong or bikini panties person? They start to kiss, but are interrupted by a knocking at the front door. Peter wonders who would be calling at 7 am and heads inside. Peter finds a seething Coop at the door, who storms in ranting about Lexi getting ahold of his real financial records, having a judge schedule a hearing over the property settlement, and subpoenaing both Peter and Michael. Coop asks Peter to be flexible with the truth at the hearing, to tell the judge that Coop doesn't get a base salary, or that he doesn't get paid for what he does. Considering that I haven't seen Coop do anything at the office yet anyway, this would probably be telling the truth. Coop tells him to show up at 9 am tomorrow at the Beverly Hills courthouse. As soon as Coop leaves, Lexi enters, saying she can't believe Coop thinks he's going to get away with not paying her what she deserves. Peter says he feels a little sorry for the guy, admitting he got something good out of it, referring to Lexi. She purrs, "Yes, the gift that keeps giving, and giving, and giving..." as she pushes Peter on the stairs such that he's now lying on his back. Then straddles him, offering her little pink bunny that keeps going, and going, and going... "Energize me!" she cries out. Looks like a morning person to me!

[MP, Amanda's Apt]
Meanwhile, Kyle, obviously another not-a-morning-person, crawls out of bed and finds Amanda in the kitchen, pouring a cup from her Mr. Coffee. It's the first time in a long time that Kyle's found her with a Mr. and hasn't become jealous! So, if he's not jealous, then it must be her turn again. She quips how Kyle took so long to comfort Taylor last night, but when Kyle reminds her it was her idea he go down to see her, Amanda cuts him off, telling him not to explain. Before she gets the chance to leave
for work, Kyle asks her why she told Eric about him losing the restaurant. She assures Kyle she and Eric are strictly business partners, and swears she didn't say a word. Kyle says he has a feeling Eric's somehow involved in the Boston buyout. This upsets Amanda, who thinks Kyle is picking on her Eric-poo.

[Burns-Mancini-Coop Medical Office]
Michael invites Jennifer and Craig over to the office to introduce them to the man who will make them all millionaires. They enter, where they find a dweeb by the name of Dr. Mosley wearing some sort of apparatus on his hand. Here, he demonstrates a prototype of The Mancini Glove (yes, another original name by the oh-so-creative writing staff). He pulls out a steak from a cooler and plops it on the table to represent a human limb. Michael slices it with the same precision he uses in the operating room, and comments on how the blood pools at the edge. Dr. Mosley then runs the pinkie of the glove over the cut in the steak. Steam rises from the raw beef and a sizzling noise is heard throughout the room. "Viola!" Michael exclaims, just like George Foreman does when he's selling his Lean Mean Fat Reducing Grilling Machine. "Completely cauterized, just the way you like it, medium rare!" Michael tells Craig it costs less than the traditional cauterizer, but that they could sell them at 4 or 5 times the price. Craig wants to set-up a company, and figures they'll be in the black in about a year. Michael, on the other (gloved) hand, so-to-speak, doesn't want to wait that long, so he opts that they sell out to a big pharmaceutical firm instead. The two start arguing, while Dr. Mosley just wants to get paid his $20,000 for the over-hyped soldering iron on a finger doohickie. Craig reluctantly hands over a check to Dr. Mosley, adding, "Okay. I paid the man, so we're doing it my way." Unfortunately, Dr. Mosley took the glove and left, so Michael has to put the hot dog he's holding back into the cooler, unable to show how John Wayne Bobbitt could've taken advantage of such a glove device.

[AWA, Eric's Office]
Megan drops by Eric's office for their luncheon date, but before they go, Megan has Eric sit down so she can discuss their "relationship." Eric chokes momentarily, asking "Isn't it a little too soon to be having that kind of talk?" Megan tells him it's regarding her job hunting, and how it occurred to her that Eric is this incredible business man. Megan continues, "I know I don't have a lot of job skills, but I do have a lot of people skills. And I work hard, or at least get people hard..." Before she can describe what $10 will get him, Eric figures out what she's getting at and blurts, "You want to come work for me!" Actually, she wants Eric to be her mentor. He accepts the challenge. She thanks him by giving him a handshake-job, a peck on the cheek, and a hug. Kyle spots Amanda out of the corner of his eye heading towards his office, so he grabs Megan and gives her a good tonguing just as Amanda opens the door to the office. Amanda apologizes for the intrusion, but Eric tells her it's okay, that Megan was just thanking him for agreeing to show her the ropes, the same way he must've shown Amanda many a year ago. After Amanda leaves, Megan asks why he did that. Eric apologizes, saying he got carried away with lesson one. They go to lunch.

[Upstairs Jazz Club]
Jennifer and Craig are slow dancing. Jennifer whispers, "You're such a good dancer. I bet you all the girls you've danced with ended up sleeping with you." She looks up at him and drools. Craig replies, "I know what you're trying to do, Jennifer, but I've already made up my mind. I'm not interested in any get-rich-quick schemes. Either we start a company, or I'm not involved." Obviously, he has NO CLUE what she's up to. Didn't he hear what she just said. She wants sex, Mr. Life Buoy. Jennifer explains to Craig that while others were learning to walk, Mancini's were learning to manipulate. She begs Craig not to give in to Michael. Craig replies, "You have 24 hours to turn Michael around. Twenty-four hours, then I'm pulling out my money and leaving town. This time for good." Jennifer pouts, knowing all too well that means no nookie. 


[Kyle's the Restaurant]
Kyle presents Taylor with a letter stating that the building where they have both the jazz club and restaurant is being sold, and from now one they're on a month-to-month lease. He notices that it's the exact same thing that happened with his Boston restaurant and thinks something fishy is going on. In a moment of genius, Kyle figures Eric Baines is somehow involved. Taylor mentions that she paid the rent in person, allowing her to chum it up with their landlord, Mr. Bender. She says she found out
that the buyer's name is Upper West Holding Company. Kyle mutters the name to himself, as if it's going to trigger another brilliant thought to come from his brain. It fails. Taylor tells Kyle that the deal is going down tomorrow night at the Belle Vista restaurant. Kyle tells her he doesn't even want to know how she got that information, so Taylor tells him, "You know, tight dress, big lips, works like a charm." She demands to go with him tomorrow night since her interest is at stake here too.

[Beverly Hills Courthouse]
Michael fails to show up at the Sterling vs. Cooper hearing. A deep voice announces, "Round Three, FIGHT!" Peter can't really say much on Cooper's behalf, other than how he did a stellar job in saving the world from Shang Tsung. But Lexi is worse than Kitana, and poor Johnny Cage doesn't stand a chance. Shao Kahn, acting as judge, rules in favor of Lexi, and
awards her with most of Coop's worldly possessions, including a summer home on Nantucket. Lexi will soon become the subject of all the "There once was a girl from Nantucket..." jokes. This is truly one mortal combat. The judge rules that Coop must make monthly payments to Lexi until she marries again. Coop figures either Michael or Peter must've turned over his books to Lexi's lawyers. Peter comments that he's here by Coop's side, while Michael's not. Coop, in a moment of Meganitis, states, "It must be Michael."

[Dr. Mosley's Lab]
Jennifer pays Dr. Mosley a visit, and as usual, scantily clad. I'm beginning to wonder if she's simply using Megan's old wardrobe now that Megan has a day job. Jennifer purrs that she just had to see him again, leading her way with her breasts. Dr. Mosley mentions that he actually has several versions of the Mancini Glove. One of them is perfect, however, another one of them has a short somewhere in the system which could cause the glove to "turn on its master." She gets wet while coming
on to him, by spilling a cup of water on herself. She asks him to get her a towel from the men's room and to wipe her dry. While he's away, she switches the labels on two of the gloves, the Mutha Glover and the Cauterizer-Me-Elmo models.

[Burns-Mancini-Coop Medical Office]
Michael arrives at the office only to find Coop sitting behind his desk. Coop mentions the fact that someone turned over his books to his ex-wife, but it doesn't seem to phase Michael, and why should it since he was too busy stealing Coop's glove idea, which is the next item on Coop's agenda. Michael informs Coop that the patent has already been filed. Coop wishes Michael luck, saying he deserves everything that's coming to him.

[Belle Vista Restaurant, 7 pm]
Taylor and Kyle are staking out the bar from one of the tables at the restaurant. Taylor spots Bender arriving, which causes her to offer Kyle a fishy-smelling shrimp. Kyle tells Taylor he found out that the Upper West Holding Company also bought the Boston restaurant. Then Kyle spots Amanda seated at a table nearby. Kyle knows who's boss in his new relationship, so he tells Taylor they've got to get out of there. Taylor protests, but Kyle assures her he'll find another way to nail Baines. So they try to sneak out, and as they do, they manage to scoot their chairs across the floor, causing a discordant noise to ring out. Amanda looks up and sees the two McBrides slipping out. But before she can get up, Eric arrives with Megan. Eric sees a man at the bar giving him the eye and motioning for him. Even though this is West Hollywood, Eric takes his chances and approaches the fella. Luckily, it's only the landlord, Bender, who hands Eric a contract, giving Eric the rights to both Kyle's the restaurant and Upstairs Jazz Club.

[MP, Coop's Apt]
Coop is lying on his Matt-couch, enjoying a fine wine, when he gets a call from Kimberly's mother, Mrs. Shaw. Apparently, Mrs. Shaw hasn't moved from her favorite chair since the last time she and Coop spoke, although she does appear rather dolled up for Brett, as she calls him. She's showing off her legs from underneath a short black skirt, as well as sporting a tight cotton sweater. Too bad, Mrs. Shaw, that these things make little difference when simply talking on the phone. Anyway, they
trash talk about Michael, and Coop promises that he'll get back at Michael for stealing his invention as well as for providing Lexi with those files. Mrs. Shaw offers some words of wisdom I once read in a fortune cookie. It read: "We should not dwell on the bad things in life, we should eliminate them... in bed."

[MP, Amanda's Apt]
Amanda is lying awake in bed waiting for Kyle to come home. When he finally does, she tests him by asking him if the club had a busy night, knowing all along he was actually with Taylor. Kyle lies by saying yes, all the regulars were there. He strips down and enters the bed, but that's all he's going to be entering tonight. Amanda rolls over to turn out the light, then remains that way, her back to him.

[Peter's Condo]
Peter wakes up and finds Lexi, despite not being a morning person, packing her bags. Now that the settlement is over, she's on her way back to Cleveland. Peter can't believe that she used him to get to Coop. She replies, "I can't drift from man to man without any direction." She heads out the door with Peter in tow. He rambles every line he used on Amanda months back, but it's no good and Lexi drives off.


[AWA, Billy's Office]
Sam brings a big advertising prop for Acapulco Cheese Snacks that she's been working on to show Billy. A big cheese doodle wearing a sombrero is what I call a good use of an artist's talents. Sam groans that she works and lives with Billy but still doesn't get any. Billy runs to the door, lisping all the way about privacy, and shuts it. He runs back to Sam, whose blouse is barely being held together by a single button, and they press their bodies together. Billy reaches down and says, "One moment,
while I whip this out." Sam, her hands doing some exploring of her own, did notice a small, yet hard thing down around Billy's midsection. "Is that your little Willie, or do you have a diamond ring box in your pocket?" she asks. Lucky for Billy, it's the latter. He gives Sam an engagement ring. Sam gets so excited that she rips her blouse off. Just then, Amanda comes in to ask for some man advice from Billy, so Sam scurries to hide. Billy takes Sam's blouse and stuffs it down his pants while telling Amanda to be happy with what she's got, even if it is just Kyle. Amanda thanks him, then comments about the company's policy regarding casual dress means wearing more than just a bra.

[Office Park, St. George's Pharmaceutical Co.]
The board room is full of business people from the pharmaceutical company, ready for a demonstration from Michael and Dr. Mosley. It is highly reminiscent of the demo scene from Robo Cop, with pretty much the same results... "Dick, I'm very disappointed in you." No one gets killed in this scene, but the volunteer who put on the Mancini glove ends up getting electric shock treatment, since the glove that Dr. Mosley brings is the one with the short circuit in it as a result of Jennifer's earlier
shenanigans. The company is not too impressed by this glove and they disperse. Jennifer takes Michael aside and convinces him they must return to their original plan to use Craig.

[Eric's Hotel Suite]
Megan pays Eric a visit to confront him about his behavior in the office the other day, referring to the kissing scene between them. She wants to clear the air and find out whether their relationship is one of business or pleasure, because even though that was true in her old line of work, she's set new standards. Eric laughs and tells her that he was just giving her lesson #1, kissing the boss' ass or other orifice. He informs her he's not interested in her "that way." Megan asks if he's gay, after all, Melrose is looking for a replacement for Matt, but when he says no, she doesn't know whether to feel stupid or insulted. Well Megan, everyone already knows you're stupid, so I vote for insulted. He explains that he just needs to use her every once in awhile.

[Upstairs Jazz Club]
Amanda, heeding the advice of Billy Campbell, her first mistake, decides to surprise Kyle with a picnic basket. Only she's the one in for a surprise, because when she opens the door to his office, she finds Kyle and Taylor sitting together on the couch. Amanda tries to run away, but Kyle catches her. He and Taylor explain to Amanda that the same holding company that bought-out his Boston restaurant is also behind the deal with his restaurant and club here in LA, and that Eric is somehow
involved. Amanda, the jealous ball still in her court, defends Eric, saying that Eric is dating Megan, and that Taylor is probably the one behind this whole charade, in another futile attempt to get closer to Kyle. Amanda blames Kyle for slowly destroying their relationship.

[MP Courtyard]
Amanda asks Megan how she and Eric are doing. Megan says they're okay, but wants to know why the interest. Amanda admits it's purely for selfish reasons, saying, "Maybe if he's happy and in love, he'll lose interest in my agency."  "All I can say is, he is all business, all the time, with me." Amanda shrugs her shoulders, surprised that Megan's backing into tricking. For years, at this time of year, the phrase "Trick or treat" always meant the same thing to Megan. Megan adds that Eric is definitely not interested in her, she thinks he's actually in love with someone else, and that he's simply using her to make this other person jealous. Megan is fine with this because Megan actually feels she used Eric to make Michael jealous, although she doesn't exactly know why. Amanda comments, "Well, if you're looking to start a support group, two of Michael's ex-wives are dead. But I do have Jane's phone number in Chicago."

[Wilshire Memorial Hospital]
As Coop is heading from the hospital parking lot to the building, Mrs. Shaw approaches him. Coop can't believe she's there and he grabs her by the arm to lead her away, saying "If Michael sees us together it could ruin everything!" Mrs. Shaw demands, "Please take your hand off my arm... NOW!" Coop steps back, sort of excited, looking at Mrs. Shaw as if to say, "Wow, that was just like the way Kimberly used to say it!" He warns her that Michael is as smart as the devil, and the only advantage I have is that he doesn't know what's coming." Mrs. Shaw begs for Coop not to dismiss her, saying, "I can be a valuable ass...et." Then she adds, rather melodramatically, "We've got to get him!!" Coop dismisses her overacting, trying to pacify her by saying, "I'll keep you posted, I promise. Now go back to Ohio, even though your city is gone, where all your favorite places, were reduced to parking spaces." Mrs. Shaw accepts this and leaves to back and sit in her favorite easy chair.

[Burns-Mancini-Coop Medical Office]
Michael finds Kimberly packing up and asks what she's doing. Megan tells him When Megan informs Michael that she's already landed another job, working for Eric Baines, Michael resorts to low blows, saying, "Once a hooker, always a hooker." Megan grabs him by his wrist, and wrestles him to the ground, threatening him. "Michael, if you ever call me hooker again, I'll kill you." Boy, doesn't this feel just like the set-up prior to J.R. Ewing getting shot? First, Mrs. Shaw, then Coop, now Megan? Not to mention Craig once Michael screws him again.

[Eric's Hotel Suite]
Amanda discusses Eric's relationship with Megan. Eric explains that it's strictly business. Then she asks him what their relationship is. He tells her it's close, but has room for improvement. He leans over and they kiss. Amanda tricks Eric into admitting his real feelings for her, saying he's loved her for a long time. She reciprocates, saying "I love you, too. He boasts, "I knew you'd finally come around," then leans over for some more tongue candy, when she adds, "...as a friend." She sets the
record straight, telling Eric he's strictly her partner in business and that she loves Kyle. She confronts him about the Boston restaurant, as well as Kyle's and Upstairs. Eric admits he's been behind everything. She gets up to leave, so Eric does the only thing he knows in order to stop her. He hurls the bottle of wine at the door in front of her as she tries to exit, the bottle shattering and leaving a big wet spot on the door. That must've been one awfully dry Chablis, because in the time it takes
Amanda to spin around and look back a Eric, the stain on the door behind her has magically dried up! Eric makes her an indecent proposition, saying she must choose, Kyle or her ad agency in return for the million dollars he gave her. Amanda chooses Kyle and tells him she's not scared. He warns her that she should be, because when he said lose everything, it
included Kyle.

[MP, Coop's Apt]
Lexi stops by the apartment complex on her way to the airport to pick up her first settlement check. Coop doesn't want to let her into his apartment, so he leaves her outside while he gets the check. Meanwhile, Billy, Michael, and Craig stumble out of Billy's place, where they perform a Three Stooges reenactment for Lexi. Billy tries to explain to Michael that he has a signed contract with Craig, then suggests they change the glove's name from The Mancini Glove to something with a catchy name, like Glove-O-Matic or something. Just then, Megan comes down the stairs with some laundry (thank God she's finally washing some clothes. By the look of what she had been wearing this episode, it was obvious she had reached the end of her wardrobe!) Megan sees Michael in the courtyard and assumes he's there to see her. She turns around and heads back to
Jennifer's. Then Peter shows up. The Three Stooges wonder what he's doing there. He answers them when he tells Lexi he's been looking all over for her, because he wanted to tell her he loves her. Coop comes out just in time to hear this statement, and can't believe what he's just heard. Neither can the audience, considering they've only been together a few times in the past couple of weeks. Lexi, in order to continue this absurdity, responds, "I can't leave you, I love you, too." They start kissing, and Coop contorts his face in disbelief, when he should be kicking up his heels in joyous celebration. After all, this may be the
first and last settlement check he's going to have to write!