MM: I don't know Goddess, this one might be a little too violent for you.
GC: (blank stare)
MM: Alright. But don't say I didn't warn you. It's called...The Debt. (insert maniacal laugh)
GC: Stop that. And get that flash light beam out of your face, you look like a girl scout for Zeus sake!
(((Gabby is kinda zoning out in the woods)))
GC: hey she looks like you. Same blank stare.
MM: (blank stare)
GC: yeah, that's the one.
(((Gabby Thanks Xena for sticking by her through everything.)))
GC: don't you have something to say to me Melissa?
MM: (blank stare)
GC: Yeah yeah, we've already established that - you got the look down perfectly. Now, what have you got to say to me? Hmmm?
MM: Thank you Goddess.
GC: for?
MM: (sigh) Sticking by me through everything.
GC: and?
MM: and?
GC: yes, and?
MM: and...uhm...for being you?
GC: good girl. (ruffles my hair)
(((Gabrielle to Xena: "I hope I never disappoint you Xena.")))
GC: why can't you be more considerate like that?
MM: (mutter)
(((FLASHBACK: Xena is being crucified. A roman soldier breaks her legs)))
GC: (eyes light up with excitement) rewind.
(((Xena rampages across the countryside)))
GC: all that over a little broken leg?! My whole family was murdered for Zeus-sake!
MM: She could have used an Advil.
GC: (blank stare)
(((Xena is stopped from killing a man by Boris)))
GC: That peacenick again? I thought he died.
MM: It's Boris, Goddess.
GC: Do I look like an idiot? That is clearly just Krafstar in need of a hair cut.
MM: (squinting) Hey! You're right.
GC: is there some sort of bardic handbook on stating the obvious that I am unaware of? Of course, I'm right! But that does nothing to answer my question. Why is the peacenick here?
MM: It's not actually the peacenick Goddess, it's an actor who plays him.
GC: oh. I mean, shut up pissant.
(((Xena: "Boris, I want the dead.)))
GC: Now what could she possibly...want with...the... (shudder) that's just gross.
MM: You alright Goddess? You don't look so good.
GC: I'm fine.
(((Xena "I say kill ‘em all!" Plants a pole into the ground with the head of a dead man on it)))
It would take Trancer and two firefighters 45 minutes to revive the Goddess. It would then take them another 45 to revive the bard. While Melissa survived the gross factor, she was less fortunate surviving the wrath of Gene. Seems the local psychologist was less than pleased to discover Melissa had undone years of therapy with the Goddess in less than 3 seconds.
(((Xena intimidates a young boy by making faces at him. Then she spits water at him through her teeth)))
MM: oh my how tough you are....(suddenly finds herself drenched in water) (heavy sigh) (turns slowly to look at Callisto)
GC: (innocent grin) (wiping water droplets from her chin) What?
MM: (slowly turns back to the TV)
(((Gabrielle: "and to think two people like that made a beautiful child like Solon.")))
GC: (blank stare) Solon? Xena had a son? (evil grin) uhm, excuse me bard. I got something to do. (vanishes)
Moments later Callisto returns covered in rubble and in a rather somber mood.
MM: You ok Goddess?
GC: Nothing works. I don't feel better, just empty.
MM: (lip starts to quiver)
GC: Gods sometimes you can be so melodramatic, I just wanted you to make me a sandwich.
(((Xena tells Gabby, "It's not about hate, it's about love.")))
MM: love? She thinks that's love? Now I see where you get it from.
GC: shut up pissant.
MM: (inward smile)
(((Xena and Boris are having sex on a horse)))
MM: They must really hate each other.
GC: (blank stare)
MM: how do they stay up there like that?
GC: (shrug) I mean....how should I know?
(((Xena puffs on opium)))
GC: now that's attractive.
MM: yeah.
GC: what?
MM: I mean....she could really use a hair brush.
(((Lau Ma: "You're wrong. I don't eat meat)))
MM: ::blush::
GC: (blank stare)
(((Lau Ma kicks Xena's hinder)))
GC: oh, I like her.
(((Lau Ma: "Fill yourself with desire and see only illusion. Empty yourself of desire and understand the greatness of real things.")))
MM: oh, I like her.
(((Xena plays Tic Tac Toe with Ming)))
MM: Goddess?
GC: No.
MM: But...
GC: I said no.
(((Gabby "You kidnaped that child and you would have killed him if you didn't get what you wanted?" Xena: "yes")))
MM: Apparently that no killing children policy she's got is pretty liberal.
(((Gabby: "I'm sorry Xena but I can't help you commit murder.")))
GC: I don't think she needs your help at that, dear heart.
(((Xena is in a bamboo cage)))
GC: (big Grin...one might say a big goofy grin, well you know, if one didn't value their life)
(((Xena is chased down by dogs)))
GC: Say Melissa, do you want to play a game?
MM: NO!
GC: ya big baby.
(((Lau Ma rescues Xena)))
GC: That woman is really starting to get on my nerves.
(((Xena hides in the hot tub)))
GC: Is that guy blind? It's WATER! Hello - clear. You can see through it.
MM: maybe she'll drown.
GC: (smile) ya think?
(((Lau Ma breaths air into Xena's mouth)))
MM: Don't even think about it Goddess.
GC: ::blush:: I'm not.
(((Xena covers herself in mud)))
GC: don't even think about it bard.
MM: (blank stare)
GC: oh.
(((in a montage of memories Xena recalls Callisto drowning in the Quick Sand)))
MM: Goddess? Were you pleading for you life?
GC: NO! ... I mean, Damn that Xena, her memory never was very good.
(((Xena prepares to kill the Green Dragon, but finds Gabby hiding in his place. Gabby: "I'm sorry Xena I couldn't let you do this.")))
GC & MM: (mouths drop open in shock)
(((guards capture Xena)))
GC: oh, you would be so dead.
MM: (apparently she located the book on stating the obvious)
(((TO BE CONTINUED.....)))
GC: What the! Bard, where is the rest of the show?
MM: (whimper)
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