Quotes
Surprise Xander: "So. Buffy's party. Mañana."
Cordelia: "Well, just because she's Ms. Save the World and everything, you have to make a big deal? I have to cook, and everything!"
Xander: "You're cooking?"
Cordelia: "Well, I'm Chips and Dips Girl."
Xander: "Oh, horrors. All that opening and stirring."
Cordelia: "And shopping and carrying."
Xander: "Well then, you should have a person who does such things for you."
Cordelia: "Well, that's what I've been saying to my father, but does he listen?"

Xander: "Maybe we should just admit that we're dating."
Cordelia: "Groping in a broom closet isn't dating. You don't call it a date until the guy spends money."
Xander: "Fine, I'll spend, then we'll grope, whatever."

Xander: "Forget it. Must have been my multiple personality guy talking. I call him Idiot Jed, glutton for punishment."

Xander: "You ready to get down, you funky party weasel?"
Giles: "Here comes Buffy. Now remember, discretion is the better part of valor."
Xander: "You could have just said 'Shh.' God, are all you Brits such drama queens?"

Xander: "Buffy! I feel a pre-birthday spanking coming on!"
Jenny: "I'd curb that impulse if I were you, Xander."
Xander: "Check. Cancel spanking."

Giles: If Drusilla is alive, then it would -- it could be a fairly... cataclysmic state of affairs."
Xander: "Again, so many words! Couldn't you just say, 'We'd be in trouble?'"
Giles: "Go to class, Xander."
Xander: "Gone! Notice the economy of phrasing. 'Gone'-- simple, direct."

Giles: "You dreamt that the Master had risen, but you stopped it from happening."
Xander: "You ground his bones to make your bread."
Buffy: "That's true. Except for the bread part."

Xander: "Well, that's not a perky birthday puppy."
Willow: "So much for our surprise party. I bought little hats and everything."

Giles: "We're having a party, tonight."
Xander: "Looks like Mr. Caution Man, but the sound he makes is funny."

Xander: "Yup. Vampires are real. Lot of them live in Sunnydale. Willow will fill you in."

Xander: "Well, clearly the Hellmouth's answer to 'What do you get the Slayer who has everything!"

Willow: "What was that?"
Oz: "It looked like an arm."
Angel: "It can't be. She wouldn't."
Xander: "What? The vamp's version of snakes in a can or do you care to share?"

Giles: "His touch can literally burn the humanity out of you. A true creature of evil can survive the process. No human ever has."
Xander: "What's the problem? We send Cordy to fight this guy, and we go for pizza."

Willow: "I can't get over how cool Oz was about all this."
Xander: "Gee, I'm over it."