Chapter One: Misery Loves Company

It was a perfect evening.  Tree frogs singing, maple keys scattered every where, 
lilacs in bloom…  The delicate scent of the late spring flower wafted across the 
lawn, carried on a light breeze that cut the heat from the bright sun that had 
beat down on the party throughout the afternoon.  Carly Roberts leaned against 
the concrete wall of the patio and breathed in deeply, her eyes closed.  Enjoy 
this, she told herself.  You're going to find at least ONE thing to enjoy about 
this day, one reason to justify your complete STUPIDITY for being here.  

Her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of the band striking into an upbeat 
number through the French doors.  The blast of the horns brought her back to 
reality.  HORNS?  What was this… 1942?  This entire "event" put her teeth on 
edge.  From the dress, which she had hated on sight… color AND style… to the 
damn harpist at the ceremony.  Why was she here?  What kind of craziness had 
convinced her this was a good idea? 

Depressed people, she thinks, scowling at the ground, will do just about 
anything for attention.  And by this point, it was damn near pathetic what she 
would do just to get Jason to smile at her.  And he had.  Twice.  One, two… 
Heart in throat, pinpricks on the back of her neck, dizzy spells… Oh, no doubt.  
She wasn't even close to "over" him.  And for those two short reasons she had 
endured all of this.  Besides.  What kind of choice did she have? Years and 
years of coming second, of trying to make Jason see… first by her trademark 
manipulations, and then by trying REALLY hard to be patient, understanding.  
Bending over backwards, swallowing pride, biting her tongue, and getting her 
heart kicked and stomped on repeatedly… And THIS is what she gets?

Only Robin would have the gall.  The unfathomable nerve… And of course no one 
saw it for what Carly was sure it was… Robin had won the war, now she wanted to 
string Carly up in the Town Square to have the locals spit on her. But there had 
been no way not to look petty, vicious, and generally bitchy and still get out 
of it.  So she'd decided to do the last thing saccharine Robin must have 
expected.  She still relished that moment, the sweet smile she'd plastered on 
her face as she'd cooed "Oh, Robin!  I'd love to be one of your bride's maids".  
The look on Robin’s face, the momentary flicker of shock, was something she 
would hold in her memory forever.  

WHAT had she been ON?  Self destruction was one thing, but this… This was 
insane.  She had endured dress fittings with Brenda Barrett, for God's sake. She 
had consented to wear this yellow atrocity with flats (can't TOWER over the 
bride, after all) and all so that Jason would think well of her, so that she 
would look as saintly and forgiving as Robin had endeavored to look in asking 
her.  Saintly perfect wonderful Robin.  The woman of the dreams of the man of 
her dreams.  

Carly glanced down at her watch.  She'd been out here almost half an hour and NO 
ONE had noticed her absence.  It was official.  The evening was a bust. For some 
reason, as deeply sunk into wedding details as she had been, it hadn't really 
hit home for her yet.  This all meant one thing.  In the end, finally and 
definitely, she had lost Jason for good.  She felt tears threaten and made a 
face, putting a hand over her abdomen.  Somehow, some part of her had thought, 
right up to the bitter end, that Jason would come to his senses. And when he 
did, there she would be.  Frumpy, badly dressed, yes… but there! Ready and 
waiting, just like always.  Steady and unwavering all these years. And THIS TIME 
he'd see.  This time it wouldn't just be sex for him.  This time it would be 
something real.  This time he'd look at her with that deep gaze he always gave 
Robin.  This time he'd whisper sweet nothings in her ear, this time he'd lie 
with her in his arms all night…

It didn't seem fair.  HOW was it possible that she could love someone like this, 
that it could fill her up until she overflowed with joy, and not have them love 
her back?  How was it possible that it had happened this many times? Never.  She 
never got loved back.  She just got stepped on.  

Ohhhhhh… All right.  Yeah.  It was time to get drunk.  

Carly pushed herself off the wall and shuffled in the horrible shoes across the 
patio back to the door.  She slipped in and was immediately assaulted by the 
image of Jason and Robin dancing together, the music now slow.  They gazed 
lovingly into each other's eyes as they glided across the floor, the other 
couples parting, and watching in awe at the undeniable purity of their emotions.

"Oh, just shoot me," she breathed to herself.  The bar… There was a bar here 
some place.  She scanned the room, and spotted it finally.  Her heart sank at 
the sight of her Uncle Luke standing, an elbow propped on the edge of the bar, 
deep in conversation with the bartender.  No…  Not a good idea. She could hear 
it ringing in her ears.  "Sweet Caroline!  Why so blue?"… She shuddered.  Not 
tonight.  She couldn't take it.  

Unsure of what to do next, Carly walked aimlessly, never straying far from the 
wall, and looked down at the floor to avoid the eyes of the guests.  She knew 
too many people here.  In fact, with the exception of some of Robin's medical 
school pals, she knew everyone.  

A waiter glided past with a tray of champagne flutes.  Ah ha!  Good enough, she 
decided, and grabbed a glass off the tray as he passed her.  She took a serious 
gulp.  It was premium, of course.  Everything was, in its irritating, soft focus 
sort of way.  She leaned gracelessly against the wall, tucking her free arm 
under the other, and surveyed the room critically.  The flowers, she had to 
admit, were nice.  All the place settings had crystal bells for the guests to 
ring instead of tapping water glasses to get the couple to kiss. NOT that they 
needed any encouragement.  They were nauseating enough all on their own.  She 
glanced back at the happy couple.  Jason was wearing a tie. Jason.  And the 
meal, salmon and asparagus.  She knew he would have preferred pizza.  But he 
probably handed the reigns over to Robin, let her make all the decisions, since 
he wanted her to be happy and he didn't care.  That was Jason.  She knew him too 
well.  

Carly felt that same and familiar ache grab her by the throat, and she downed 
the remaining contents of her glass quickly.  She turned against the wall a 
moment, hoping she was not being watched, and surreptitiously wiped at the tears 
threatening to run down her face.  

This was her hell.  Watching the man she loves marry someone else at close 
range, and having to wear mascara through the whole thing.  Life isn't fair, she 
thought.  There is no God.  Sucks to be me.

Carly raised her head and looked around desperately.  She had to get out of 
here.  She spotted the station where the waiters were filling the glasses of 
champagne.  She smiled to herself, the escape she'd been looking for offering 
itself.  

"It's about time," she sang to herself under her breath.  

*~*~*

Nikolas Cassadine stepped out into the night air and took a deep breath.  This 
had been a really long day.  There had never been any way he wasn't going to be 
here to support Robin, but it had been painful all the same.  To see that 
clearly, that even after all this time, it had always been Jason.  

Not that she'd ever lied to him.  Or led him on.  It had been understood, she 
was in love with a man who's lifestyle she couldn't abide, so they continually 
split up and struggled, and fought, and in all that time, he'd been there. The 
strong shoulder to cry on.  Waiting, even though she told him it was hopeless, 
for her to come to her senses and realize that he was a constant. That he didn't 
hurt her.  That his lifestyle, contrary to popular opinion, didn't get people 
shot.  Toppled off of parapets, shoved down stairs, yes… But that was all in the 
past.  

None of it had mattered to Robin, not in the end.  Yes, they had "dated", but 
he'd always been kept at arm's length, both physically and emotionally.  He 
hadn't had the same attitude about their relationship.  He had opened up to her, 
spilled everything he held inside.  That was the really sad thing.  Robin knew 
him better than any woman ever had, and with the exception of a few kisses, all 
of which he had initiated, their relationship had never gone anywhere.  

Yet here he was, the friend, the confidant, and the loser.  To a mob boss who 
was risking her life just by openly caring for her.  Robin had decided she 
couldn't live with out him, though, so there was no other choice but to wish her 
well and say good-bye.

That was what he'd hoped to be able to do tonight.  Say a final goodbye, and get 
on with the rest of his life.  It hadn't worked.  She looked more beautiful 
tonight than she ever had before.  Her dark hair curled and framed by a soft 
lace veil, her brown eyes sparkling, her entire being glowing with happiness.  
She was radiant.  There was no other word.  And she would never be in his life, 
not the same way, ever again.  

Nikolas leaned back against the wall and looked up at the stars feeling 
magnificently sorry for himself.  He should be used to this.  He always ended up 
alone in the end.  Everyone always left for greener pastures.  It was a pattern, 
going back to infancy.  

He started slightly, coming out of his pity party, at the sound of doors 
opening.  He stifled a groan, and sank back into the shadows.  He couldn't 
imagine that it was going to be anyone he wanted to see… quite the opposite, 
actually.  Sure enough, Carly Roberts appeared and strode across the patio, a 
magnum of champagne in one hand, an empty flute in the other.  She set the 
bottle down on the wall with a flourish, obviously pleased with herself. Nikolas 
watched in the dark, as she began to twist the metal caging around the cork, 
singing quietly to herself.

"Please baby can't you see my mind's a burnin' hell…  I got razors a rippin' and 
tearin' and strippin' my heart apart as well… "  

She stopped singing and took a closer look at the cork, suspecting that she was 
not making any progress at all.  Once she'd determined the problem, she started 
again, a little louder.  

"Tonight you told me that you ache for something new… And some other woman is 
looking like something that might be good for you."

Nikolas frowned, and looked from his shadowed corner, back to the door.  She 
looked occupied, he could probably escape unnoticed.  He started to move when 
she stopped and laughed bitterly, tossing her head back.  

"Go on and hold her till the screaming is gone… Go on believe her when she tells 
you nothings wrong"

Her voice cracked on the last note.  Nikolas held his place, staring at her. She 
wiped tears from her eyes, then returned her attention to the champagne bottle, 
her hands shaking.  This time her voice comes out acidic, obviously bitter. 

"But I'm the only one who'll drown in my desire for you…"

She laughs again, peeling the foil off the cork. Nikolas narrowed his eyes at 
her and stepped back into the shadows. This looked just a little too familiar to 
him. Someone might actually be having a worse time at this wedding than he was.  

"It's only fear that makes you run…  The demons that you’re hiding from, when 
all your promises are gone"

She took a deep breath, her voice now clearly shaking, as it dropped down to a 
whisper.

"I'm the only one"

Carly closed her eyes, finally letting some of the tears spill.  She'd been 
fighting them off too long and at this point, she didn't care.   It didn't 
matter.  She'd lost Jason, the one thing she'd had left, and now she was all 
alone again.  Just her and enough champagne to drown a small rodent.  She picked 
up the bottle, bracing it against her stomach, and twisted the cork slowly, 
easing it out of the mouth of the bottle.  She jostled the bottle slightly, 
biting her lip and focusing all her energy on the task at hand.  She was not 
going to cry anymore.  She had the rest of her life for that.  Tonight she 
wasn't planning on feeling a whole lot more pain.  The cork finally gave and 
popped out of the bottle like a shot.  Carly jumped back from the wall, righting 
the bottle as the cold liquid bubbled up and spilled over her hands. She smiles 
to herself, sadly, and sucked a bit of the champagne off the back of her hand.    

"Ok…  Now we're getting somewhere."

"Where's that?"  

Carly let out a yelp and spun around.  She could see the figure leaning against 
the wall.  She squinted into the darkness, but couldn't make out the face.  She 
scowled at the mystery man anyway.

"What do you want?"  She demanded, her voice harsh and guarded.  Nikolas stepped 
forward, revealing himself, and Carly's dour expression faded into confusion.  
Nikolas Cassadine?  Great.  Rich kids with nothing to do, this was her audience?  
She put the bottle down on the edge of the concrete wall, and crossed her arms, 
smirking at him.

"Well, well…  Hiding out?"

The biting tone of Carly's voice immediately caused Nikolas to regret speaking 
up.  He furrowed his brow, feeling a little defensive.  The irritated look on 
his face set Carly at ease, and she leaned back against the barrier

"I was looking at the stars, getting some air," he told her, shrugging.  "What 
were YOU endeavoring to do?"

Carly sucked on the inside of her cheek, nodding, a bitter smile playing on her 
lips.

"I'm ENDEAVORING to forget this day ever happened.  You?"

"I already explained myself."

"Surrrrre…  And you know what?  I believe you, too."  Carly turned away, looking 
out at the vast country club lawn again.  Nikolas looked at her back. He barely 
knew this girl, except that she had, over the years, caused Robin a lot of 
heartache.  How or why was beyond him.  But it had appeared to be all for the 
love of Jason.  Though Robin had continually told him people like Carly Roberts 
didn't understand real love.  Nonetheless, there was something about her manner 
that made him curious.  After all, what was she doing here? A bridesmaid 
preparing to get drunk all alone on the terrace in the middle of the reception.  
Not something you see every day.  Well, not one that was reported to hate the 
bride.  Nikolas found himself crossing to the barrier, unsure of why he wasn't 
just going back inside.  Probably because Robin, in her infinite wisdom, pulled 
one hell of a seating chart joke on him, seating him with Lucky and Lizzie.  
Painful.  No other words for it.  He and Lucky were generally civil, but a 
forced meal?  Lucky had gotten through it by focusing on his adoring girlfriend 
even more than usual and the whole thing had made Nikolas feel a little bit like 
too much rich food.  He looks back at Carly.

"Don't bridesmaids have duties they're supposed to attend to?"

Carly made a face.  "If I spend another minute with my fellow "maids" I'm likely 
to go completely postal."

"Postal."  Nikolas made the question into a statement, trying to hide his 
amusement at the woman's complete lack of embarrassment at the depths of her 
bitterness.  Carly frowned at him.  

"It's a word."  

"I KNOW it's a word," Nikolas informed her.   "I even know it's slang meaning."

"Congratulations," Carly sneered.  Nikolas took a step back, shaking his head.

"I didn't think I'd find anyone else here to rival the mood I'm in, but you're 
doing an admirable job."

Carly looked momentarily confused, then a slow, sly smile spread across her 
face.  

"Oh… Right…" she laughed, shaking her head.  "How could I forget? Yeah, you're 
Robin's ex, aren't you?"  

Nikolas' shoulders tensed visibly.   "I'm Robin's FRIEND.  Period."

"Sure.  Yeah, I know.  But who's choice was that?"  Carly raised her eyebrows, 
clearly enjoying torturing him with this.  Nikolas turned away from her.  Not 
that being insulted wasn't a welcome break from smiling numbly to everyone who 
approached him to talk about how beautiful the ceremony was, or how Jason and 
Robin so clearly belonged together, or how it gave you hope in the world… No, in 
a twisted way, this was preferable treatment.

Carly watched Nikolas carefully, sizing him up.  This was the only prolonged 
conversation she'd ever had with the guy.   She'd seen him around, certainly. 
Heck, in some circles they'd probably even be considered cousins, in a round- 
about, totally dysfunctional kind of way.  But he'd never been of any concern to 
her.  He was completely useless as far as keeping Robin away from Jason was 
concerned, and once she'd decided her best tactic was to give Robin a taste of 
her own medicine, she hadn't had much use for digging around in other people’s 
lives.  No, during all of Jason and Robin's break-ups… and they had been 
plentiful… she'd never worried much about what Robin was doing.  Just about when 
she was coming back.  

"Look,” Carly said, slowly,  "Whatever your problem is, I've got the cure, ok?  
And you can either help me imbibe, or take your sorry self back inside." 

Nikolas looked back at her. 

"Is that some sort of invitation?"  

Carly shrugged.  "We'll call it the toast to the also-rans."  She picked up the 
champagne flute from the wall, and carefully poured a generous serving. She held 
it out to Nikolas.  He stared first at the glass, then back at her. Slowly he 
started back across the terrace.  Well… What else was there to do? At least it 
was quiet out here.  He reaches her and extended his hand to take the glass from 
her.  Carly snapped it back at the last second, and eyed him suspiciously.  

"How old are you, anyway?"

Something in her tone let Nikolas know that she was teasing more than actually 
policing his liquor consumption.  He laughed slightly.  "I'm 21.  You?"

"Hey!"  Carly exclaimed, with put on embarrassment,  "You're not supposed to ask 
a girl her age!  I thought you were supposed to be polite to a fault," she 
raised the bottle to him.  "Cheers."  

Nikolas watched, with a mixture of awe and distaste as Carly took an impressive 
swig straight from the bottle.  

"Who have you been talking to?"  

Carly lowered the bottle, and licked the champagne from her lips. "My mother."

"Oh,” Nikolas smiled at her, lowering his head confidentially.  "Well. Bobbie 
likes me."

He's flirting with me, Carly thought to herself.  Strange.  But hey, why not? 
She handed him the glass.  "Tell me about it," she sighed, leaning back against 
the wall the champagne bottle still in her hand.   Nikolas shrugged modestly.  

"If you take a survey you'll find arrogant and domineering come far above polite 
in the list of adjectives people use to describe me."

Carly found herself smiling.  "Arrogant and domineering…” she mused.  "I 
wouldn't put that in your personal ad."

"My what?"

"PERSONAL AD,” She over-enunciated, as if talking to a small child.  "I'm 
assuming after tonight, you're back on the market."
 
Nikolas looked at her oddly.  Was she flirting with him?  It was hard to tell. 
There seemed to be a fine line between playing whatever game they were playing 
with each other and actual flirtation.  "I think," he said slowly  "I'm going to 
give the 'market' a rest."  

"Huh," Carly regarded him from under half-closed lids.  "Isn't that what you've 
been doing while you were waiting for Robin-sweetheart to declare her undying 
love for you?"

Nikolas' face darkened immediately.  "Exactly what makes you think that's what 
I've been doing?"  He asked, his voice cold.  Carly stared at him intently.  She 
was about to say something typically smart-alecky, but she stopped herself, 
recognizing something in his eyes.  

"You're the only person who's come out here alone all night," she said without 
emotion.  "Except me."  Nikolas stared at her.  There was a strange softening of 
her features.  She no longer looked bitter, just sad.  She turned away from him, 
looking back out at the green.  "I don't know about you, but I have to get out 
of here."  She tossed him a look over her shoulder, forcing a twisted smile.  
"You game?"  

Nikolas looked at her, then turned and glanced back through the closed doors to 
the twirling couples on the dance floor, then turned back to Carly who was still 
looking at him with an odd sort of anticipation.  He wondered what she expected 
him to do.  He looked down at the still untouched glass in his hand, and took a 
deep breath, chugging it quickly.  

"Ok," Nikolas said, looking back at her,  "Let's go."